The Inkwell

The Inkwell is a resource for First Year Composition at Florida State University. All the exercises and assignments have been submitted by FYC TAs and Instructors who have used them in their classrooms--from ENC 1905 to 1101/1102 and 1142/1145. Some TAs frequently surf the Inkwell for daily writing exercises and activities. Other TAs use the Inkwell to brainstorm their own writing exercises and activities.

We've grouped the exercises under the links below - feel free to surf and borrow at your leisure. This version of the Inkwell is an updated and expanded version of the original--created by John Grosskopf. "Paper Topics" and "Fiction Exercises" are new to the Inkwell - so there's not much here, yet. We're very interested in expanding these two new sections, in addition to the others. If you've got an exercise that you feel would make a good addition to the Inkwell--under any of the links--please submit it via e-mail to Liane Robertson at ler07c@fsu.edu or Emily J Dowd at edowd@fsu.edu.

Exercises for Our Own Words

Arguments on Trial

“Arguments on Trial”
by
Doug Hattaway

Activity Accompanies: “The New American Epidemic” (OOW 2006-2007)

Time Required: 50 Minutes

Goal/Purpose: To teach students how to identify areas of their paper that will require additional research

Procedure: Instructor will divide the class into five groups, and each will read the first draft of “The New American Epidemic”. As students are reading the draft, they will act as defense attorneys for student drinking by picking out weaknesses in the original argument. Are there any claims the author makes without using supporting evidence? Does the argument employ vague generalizations? What counter-arguments could be made? Are these arguments addressed? After reading the paper, students will a “case” developed.
The next step will be to test this case against the paper’s final draft. Would you still be able to defend student drinking? What additions in the drafting process made this argument stronger? Are there any areas where additional research would strengthen this case?

Background for the Activity: When writing argumentative research essays, many students fall into the trap of supporting opinions with opinions. By forcing students to attack an argument, they will learn to be more aware of potential holes in their own arguments, and the importance of documented research when making assertions.

Deconstructing Source Integration

1. Title: “Deconstructing Source Integration”

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea: Tana and Timothy Welch

3. Title (of the essay or section): Liam O’Flaherty’s “The Sniper” and the Irish Civil War
4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity: To show students how to successfully integrate outside sources with one’s own ideas in order to produce a new piece of writing.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: This is a homework-based activity that will require a few days of the student’s time outside class. In-class time: two sessions.

6. Procedure to Follow:

Day One: Read and discuss “Liam O’Flaherty’s ‘The Sniper’ and the Irish Civil War.” Place students into small groups.

Homework: Assign each group one of the sources from essay. As homework, each group should then find, read, and summarize the source they are assigned. They should also reexamine “The Irish Civil War” and analyze the author’s use of their assigned source—paying attention to 1) how much of the source was directly quoted, 2) how the author used the source to back up his own view, 3) how well the sources strengthen the argument, and 4) how heavily the author relies on the source. This might be best accomplished by highlighting or marking the physical page to see where the sources appeared within the essay and making notes in the margins. Each member of the group should have their own photocopy of the source. It may also help to note the different ways the author transitions from his own words to source material.

Day Two: Each group should then present their findings to the class.

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:

Many students believe a research paper is nothing more than stringing together a series of articles and then regurgitating them to the reader. By having students deconstruct a finished research paper, it is our hope that they will see the true purpose behind successfully utilizing sources. In the process, this should also help with quote integration and MLA citation. This will also give students practice looking for sources, especially when finding books in the library.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

Ideally this exercise would have better success using a research paper with more sources.

Drawbacks—instructor will probably need to take a look at all the sources used in “The Irish Civil War.” There aren’t many sources used, so the groups will be large in nature. If the instructor wishes to have groups smaller than five, some groups can be assigned to look for additional sources the author could’ve used. Also, groupwork this size can become problematic, therefore it would help if, at the end, each student can write a reflective journal detailing their experience with the assignment as well as any issues they faced while working with their group. It may be useful to have the students read Liam O’Flaherty’s “The Sniper” in class. If the source is checked out from the library, they may gain additional experience by familiarizing themselves with the interlibrary loan. It may also be challenging to “share” a book within a group, however there may a group leader that photocopies the pertinent source material and then distributes this to the rest of the group.

Dialogue & Writing

Dialogue and Writing
by Kameelah Martin and Williams Hobbs

Activity Accompanies Jessica Mansfield's "Growing into Life" (2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 50 minutes

Goal/Purpose: Teaching students how to correctly incorporate dialogue into their writing

Procedure: Instructor is to choose one section of the essay that has a good deal of dialogue, remove all punctuation and formatting that indicates dialogue before class.

* Divide the students into five groups
* Assign the edited section of the essay to each group and instruct them to re-write it applying the correct punctuation, paragraph format, etc. They should have about 10-15 minutes to complete this task.
* Each group will then present their version of the dialogue to the class by acting it out as if on stage. Each group should take no more than 5 minutes.
* When each group has performed, the instructor will then ask the class to collectively determine which dialogue sounded “natural” and why.
* The instructor will then show the class the correctly punctuated section of the essay and entertain questions about how and why to correctly incorporate dialogue into an essay.

Background for the Activity: The essay itself used a lot of dialogue and many of our own students are intimidated by using dialogue which inspired the activity. Showing them how to use it correctly will hopefully alleviate any anxiety and help to improve the range of writing skills.

Additional Comments: Instructors may decide to allow student to use handbook for this activity, but I think the spontaneity will be more effective.

Dialouge Exercise

1. Title for the Activity: Dialogue Exercise

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea: Kara Candito, Chris Findeisen, Lamar Garnes, Ashley Harris, Fayaz Kabani, Rebecca Lehmann, Lessig, Colin Lessig, Toby McCall, & Jenny Moffit

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): Allison Rose

Title (of the essay or section): “Sing with Me Somehow”

Edition: 2007-2008
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing06/?q=node/550
4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:
This is an exercise about writing dialogue. It teaches the students how to write realistic, engaging dialogue (content) as well as showing them the correct form; for example, how to use dialogue tags and correct punctuation.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 45 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:

1) The students should have read the essay before class, and highlighted places in the essay where the author makes good use of dialogue. At the beginning of class, have a short discussion about the use of dialogue in the essay. Ask them where it works best and why, where they think there should be more dialogue, and why. Discuss the tags used and the appropriate use of punctuation within dialogue, i.e. use of quotation marks, commas, periods and question marks. Have students break up into groups of three or four. This exercise can work for classrooms with computers and without computers.
2) If you have a computer classroom, do a demonstration on the overhead projector. In a blank Word document, write two lines of dialogue, double-spaced. For example,
“Have you seen my cat?” Julie asked Cathy.

“No, I haven’t. Maybe you should check the back yard,” Cathy replied.

Then, scroll down the page so that only the last line of dialogue is displayed. The next person in the group will then only be able to see the last line of dialogue. That person must write two more lines of dialogue based on what they have just read, and scroll down the computer screen so that only the last line of dialogue that they wrote is showing. This process is continued with each group member repeatedly for about twenty minutes. If the classroom does not have computers, have the students use a piece of lined paper and just fold down the paper over the dialogue they have written, making sure to leave adequate space between each line of dialogue so it’s easily covered.
3) Up to this point, the group members have no idea what was written by the other members because they have only seen one line of dialogue at a time. After the twenty minutes is up, have each group look at the entire sequence of dialogue that they have created, and have them read the stories aloud. This often gets a few laughs from everyone.
4) If you have a computer classroom, have the students submit there dialogue exercise to the class web page so you can bring it up on the overhead projector. This way, you can examine each line of dialogue and discuss whether the form is correct. If you do not have computers, you can use the doc-cam to display the paper and discuss it that way.
7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s), which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:
A former creative writing professor of one of the group members inspired this activity.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

We would recommend this activity when the students are writing personal essays or short stories in which they are using dialogue.

Don't Take This Exercise for Granted

Activity Accompanies Meagan C. Arrastia's "The One I Took for
Granted” (2004-2005 McCrimmon Award Winner)

Time Required: 35 minutes

Goals/Purpose: The goal of this exercise is to encourage students
to explore ways to employ effective detail-driven transitions within their writing.
The model paper draws on a series of incidents in the student's life and ties
them together by finding "common threads." Many students feel that
one (usually boring) incident is enough to fill 5 or 6 pages. This exercise
allows them to connect many disparate events through one unifying theme. This
assignment can work with group papers or individual papers.

Procedure:

For Group Paper:

Divide the class into groups of three or four. Have them brainstorm on common
themes in their life (ex: "overcoming adversity," "growing pains,"
"influential people," "trips," "beliefs," etc).
The students will then list as many important moments or ideas that have defined
their lives and that they feel circle around this common theme. The groups will
select one event from each member’s list, based on which event sounds
the most interesting and that they'd all like to hear more about. It doesn't
matter how disparate the events or moments are. As a matter of fact, students
should be encouraged to choose events that don't tie together in obvious ways,
to make their group paper more interesting.

Each group member will then freewrite on his or her topic. After 10 minutes,
group members will come back together and share what they have written and try
to figure out how they can string the story together. Ideally, they will work
out ways to transition between the snapshots of the lives of different group
members in an engaging way.

For Individual Paper:

Estimated Time Required for Activity: 45 minutes

Students are asked to choose "a significant person," "a significant
event," and "a significant belief," and list them on a clean
sheet of paper. Below each "significant" header, students choose and
list three scenes or incidents that are especially vivid about that person,
event, or belief. They are encouraged to choose scenes that are far apart in
time and place and perhaps don't seem to connect in obvious ways.

Students then trade their paper with classmates. Each classmate votes for which
topic sounds the most interesting, based on the "scenes" listed. Students
should get at least half a dozen opinions from class members so they have established
where the reader's interests lie.

When students gets their sheets back, they are tied to the topic that received
the most "reader votes." For each scene in that topic, they start
listing the personal emotions they felt, the adjectives that describe the person,
event, or belief as well as their state of mind. The goal is to keep them from
tying their paper together in a simple chronological way, and to order it ideationally.
Hopefully, they find that in many of these scenes they were in a similar state
of mind.

Have them begin freewriting one of the scenes, and as soon as the student finds
themselves expounding on one of the adjectives or emotions that help tie the
scene together, they jump to the next scene (they can always come back later
to flesh out the scene fully, but they have the ever-important and ever-missing
from freshman writing transition). They do this until they've tied together
all their scenes, and they have the bare bones of a personal experience paper.

Background Readings: For other ways of "making connections,"
students can look at Becky Godlasky's essay "Using Metaphor to Make Connections,"
which is in The Inkwell. Also look at the Raymond Carver's poem "Sunday
Night," in Bishop's On Writing. (As Bishop writes, "what small, overlooked
elements might loom large in your composition?" In other words, how can
find unique connections in the minute details of your stories?)

Additional Comments: "The One I Took For Granted"
is the 2004 McCrimmon Award Winner and is chock full of good things that students
can learn from. Even if you don't use our exercise, this group doesn't believe
there is a better essay you can show your students for "what to do right."

Exploratory Drafting

Exploratory Drafting by Beth Nuckolls, Debi Carruth, Amanda Carr

Time Required: about 20-30 minutes

Goal/Purpose: Often times students will add to their drafts,
change grammar errors from time to time, but they don’t really go in and
change what they have already written significantly. The goal of this activity
is to show students radical ways to approach the drafting process – to
fall out of love with what they have already written. This exercise should help
students to realize that just because they have a good draft doesn’t mean
that it cannot be better, or different and just as good.

Procedure: While this may be a good story, it seems to jump
around, touching lightly on a number of different issues, but not fully exploring
any of them. As a class, discuss what this story is about, and list each answer
on the board. For example, this story is about friendship, the dangers of advertising,
the desire to fit in and/or be cool, visiting someone in jail who has wronged
you, etc. Then divide your class into groups, and set them to making a list
together along the following lines: If you were going to rewrite this draft,
and place more emphasis on (turn to the list and assign each group one of the
topics the class came up with), what would you need to add to the next draft?
What would you need to take away? After about ten or so minutes, have each group
present their findings.

Additional Comments:

If you wanted to take this further, you could:

Ask your students to follow up on the lists that they made and have them
each rewrite the essay to accommodate the new emphasis of the paper. Then, each
group could read over each other’s essays, and see how even when emphasizing
the same points of the same papers, how different the results can be. or,
Have students take one of their own works in progress and workshop with their
peers, with the same idea in mind: what are the main ideas, what are the points
supporting it... and then either spending time in class on free-write revision
or have them turn in their next draft with a polished revision based on one
of the main points their peers saw.

Exploring the Interplay of Text and Visuals

Exploring the Interplay of Text and Visuals
“Exploring the Interplay of Text and Visuals”
By: Natalie Szymanski, Rory Lee, Olivia Johnson, Emily Baker, Ruth Kistler
Activity Accompanies: “Harry Potter and the Mystery of Magic” (OOW 2007-2008)

Time Required: 50 Minutes

Goal/Purpose: To help students explore the interplay of text and visual and further explore the effects of visual rhetoric

Procedure:

Gather the class together as a whole and introduce the activity’s main set of questions:
1. How do these visuals inform the text? (How can visuals “enhance” a text?)Likewise, how does the text inform the visual? (How can text “enhance” a visual?)
2. How can picture or text placement/layout convey a different emotion/intent/message?
3. How can font style/size/color choice convey different emotions/intents/messages?
4. Does the combination of both text and image make an argument that neither element could make on its own?
5. How does such visual rhetoric relate to the Harry Potter piece we’ve looked at on OOW?
Walk the students through each set of pictures and discuss how each of the five questions apply to our study of the interplay of text and visuals?
Replay the video for Harry Potter in class and discuss how your new understanding of the interplay of text and visuals informs your interpretation.

Post-Question Activity (in groups):

Split into groups of 3 or 4 and have them create as a group their own version of this visual rhetoric activity. Students can either choose one image and pair it with multiple words to convey different meanings, or choose one word to pair with various images to convey different meanings (in other words, they either experiment with the image or experiment with the text). Have them discuss (within their groups) why they’ve made the decisions they have, possibly using the five procedure questions from earlier; then have the groups present their images and explanations to the class and attempt to foster a discussion/debate atmosphere concerning their choices.

Exploring Web-Project Expression and Development

by Andrew Cohen and Patricia Thomas

Activity Accompanies Jonathan and Jason Trost's
"Napster Support" in OOW 2001-02

Time Required: This
assignment has multiple facets and thus can be compacted
into a one-class exercise (or homework assignment) or
expanded into a full-length project of several weeks.
The procedure listed below is the expanded version (although
any of the steps would be a worthwhile assignment on
its own).

Goals/Purpose: To enhance student understanding
of the effectiveness of website design by critiquing
both the virtues and the shortcomings of the Trost site;
to allow students to explore the facets of argumentation
and analyze the style and detriments of advocacy essay
writing as well as the benefits of scrutinizing both
sides of an issue. This activity will bolster a student’s
analytical ability by requiring independent research,
and foster the growth of interpersonal relationship
skills by allowing students to work within groups. Students
will be introduced to web-project development and will
gain the opportunity to explore expression in the computer
realm as well as develop interests in any aspect of
the technological medium. In addition, students will
discover that composition is not limited to the page
and that “writing a good paper” requires a
creative effort at all levels of a project.

Origin: This activity was inspired by the “Napster
Support” website itself as well as Pedagogy Workshop
and OOW. Also, there is always a need for another
lesson-plan regarding the creation of web-projects and
their integration into the FYC classroom.

Procedure:

The individual student will analyze the NAPSTER
web-project as to its successes and shortcomings.
This analysis should cover all aspects and ideas of
this web-project (technical design / presentation,
strength of the argument, clarity of language, explication
of intent, etc.) and nitpick down to the details.
This critique will then offer suggestions on how to
make this web-project-paper better / more complete.
Students will then be assigned into workshop groups
(approximately 4 students depending on class size)
to discuss each these critiques. Each group will choose
from a list of controversial issues (or propose their
own for the teacher's consideration) and create an
outline for a web-project based on their accumulated
critiques. (Note: depending on student computer proficiency,
supplementary reading material or instruction may
be needed).
Individual students will then research two sources
(conferring with each other to avoid duplication)
from each side of this controversial issue and develop
the most effective approach for integrating these
sources into the project.
Meeting again in groups, students will then build
their web-project. When completed, each group will
present the project to the class.

Note: These steps may be repeated to hone the
web-project and to convey the importance of the drafting
process. Ideally, if time allows, students would be
given supplementary material (readings / examples of
argumentation [essays, Chapter 14, “Understanding
Academic Analysis and Argument,” from Ede’s
text, etc], examples of effective websites, relevant
freewriting exercises, etc.) meant to parallel the construction
of this project. Creating a self-evaluation and a group-evaluation
would benefit each student.

Additional comments/Observations: Certainly
a CWC would facilitate this project. If one is not available,
this assignment (or variations of it) may be adapted
to classrooms with media consoles. Since the assignment
/ project is technology-based, its success relies on
the use of technology to some level. In the creation
of groups, techno-savvy students should be dispersed
throughout the class. If planning the expanded version
of this project, group conferences would be beneficial.

Food & Family

Food and Family
by
Kelly Bryan, Mya Guarnieri, Barrington Seetachitt, and Susie Lee

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): OOW, author not listed
Title (of the essay or section): No Woman, No Cry
Edition: 2006-2007 edition
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/book/view/437

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:

This activity is intended to inspire students to write very descriptively, and it can be used as an invention exercise for a personal essay in 1101 or a research essay in 1102

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity:

This activity, if used in its entirety, will take about a full class period, depending on how in-depth you want your students to get with the exercise.

6. Procedure to Follow:

1. Have students make a list of their ten favorite foods from childhood in their journals or wherever you have them do invention exercises (or, depending on what you are having them write about, you could modify the exercise and have them make a list of least favorite foods, current favorite foods, ten foods they would most like to try, ten favorite ethnic foods, etc). This step shouldn’t take longer than about five minutes for most students.

2. Once most students have completed their list, have them answer some questions about each item on their list in their journal. When or where did you first eat this food? Who served it to you? How often did you eat this food? What memories do you associate with this food? Do you still eat this food today? How is this food prepared?

3. Now, have your students choose several items to examine more thoroughly. Have them create a list of adjectives that could be used to describe each word. Encourage them to think about using all five senses.

4. Display “No Woman, No Cry” on the projector screen and have students read the essay.

5. Have the students discuss the following questions: What about this essay is particularly powerful? Do any images (sensory details) pop out at you? Why do those particular images stand out and what do they do for the essay? What is effective about the organization/focus? What, if anything, doesn't work for you? How does food function as an organizing factor in this
essay? How does the author transition from food to family? Is the transition effective?
How does the piece "move" overall? In regards to the essay overall, what could have been
done differently?

6. Using “No Woman, No Cry” as an example of effective description, tell your students to choose three foods from their lists to write a paragraph about. If possible, have them include a vivid description of the item as well as a specific memory that relates to that food.

7. Call on a few students to share their best paragraph, and discuss what techniques each student has used effectively in their writing.

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:
This idea came largely from recent 1102 class discussions about food, which seems to engage students more than almost anything else we have talked about.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

This activity is designed for a TEC classroom. It can be modified for employment in a technology-free classroom if you make Xerox copies of “No Woman, No Cry” for students to read in Step 5.

Don’t let your students get hung up on Step 1. Some students have a hard time coming up with something like their top ten FAVORITES, so you could suggest that they simply list the first ten things that pop into their minds.

Have some backup questions and an additional angle for fast-working students to continue working on so that they have something to keep them occupied as slower students are still completing the basic exercise.

Free Speech vs. Correct Speech

Free Speech vs. Correct Speech
Created by Wei Xiong
Activity Accompanies: “The Dixie Chicks: Taking the Wrong Way?”
Our Own Words: A Student’s Guide to First-Year Writing 2008-2009
Available at: http://writing.fsu.edu/?q=node/699

Goal/Purpose of the Activity: to attempt to define the representation of “objectivity.” We live in a society where freedom of speech is celebrated. And, as a consequence of the variety of viewpoints, the accusations of “media bias” have consistently increased. In her writer’s memo, the author of this essay writes that she/he attempts to examine the Dixie Chicks saga through her own sense of fairness—unobstructed by media-biased reports in either direction. However, each reader has his/her own calibrations of “objective” and “fair.” This activity, then, asks student to examine and compare their own senses of “fairness” and, more importantly, to effectively articulate and argue his/her case.

Estimated Time Required: 30 minutes before class. 30 minutes in class.

Procedures to Follow:

1. Before class, ask students to independently research the Dixie Chicks incident (read media portrayals from at least 3 sources), and then read the essay.
2. Ask student to rate the essay in objectivity on a chart from one to ten—one being extremely anti-Dixie Chicks and 10 being extremely pro-Dixie Chicks.
3. Ask students to prepare a “case” for his/her rating number which may include analyses of specific instances in the essay or printouts of other articles on the Dixie Chicks incident.
4. In class, ask students to break into groups of no larger than 3.
5. Each student presens his/her case to the group members.
6. Each group picks a winning “case” based on his/her argumentative strategy—not the opinion on the Dixie Chicks incident itself.
7. Ask the winning “cases” to present to the class and facilitate a discussion.

Genre Blending

Genre Blending
by
V. Wetlaufer and Frank Giampietro

Activity Accompanies: “The O” (OOW 2007-2008) and "Videotape" by Don DeLillo in Convergences

Time Required: 50 Minutes

Goal/Purpose: To teach students how to blend genres to create more interesting short stories by analyzing the element of surprise and its effect on the readers' response.

Procedure: Instructor will divide the class into five groups, and each will read the first two paragraphs of the final draft of “The O.” The groups will then report on what genre this piece represents. Teacher writes their responses on the board. Keeping in mind what they originally thought, they should note the point in the piece where their understanding of the genre changed or was reinforced. Each group will present their findings and answer the question about genre again. Using the audience's expectations of traditional genres you can complicate your own story to take advantage of surprise to increase tension and maintain interest on the part of the reader.

Background for the Activity: Too often students feel constrained by preconceived notions about what an essay should look like. This activity helps students realize that they can go way beyond the five paragraph while still maintaining a scholarly and academic viewpoint of the material they wish to present. It also helps students think more deeply about their audience—what they think their audience expects to read and what they as readers experience when reading something that challenges expectations. By reflecting on their own experiences as readers of such an essay, they will become more aware of their own readers’ experiences and take audience into account as they construct their own essays.

Good Humor

by John Bickley

Activity Accompanies Charles C. Mason's "BOO" (2004-2005
OOW)

Time Required: A Class Period

Goals/Purpose: This exercise is intended to help students
think a bit about the uses of humor in their papers: how it can benefit or hinder
their writing. Some or all of the following essay can be used. If computers
are not available to each student, then copies of the passage/paper should probably
be handed out to each student.

Procedure: The basic concept is simply to pick apart the paper,
looking specifically for humorous moments and their effects (intended or not).
I suggest having the students read over the passage/paper and highlight anything
that made them laugh (or that they think was at least intended to make them
laugh). Using the students’ suggestions as points of analysis, the pros
and cons of each humorous instance can be discussed, remedied, expanded on,
or what-have-you.

Below is a copy of the first third of the paper, with a few humorous moments
underlined and some sample comments inserted here and there. The entire paper
follows this sample section.

Sample Passage:

Boo

The room is blacker than the night sky on a new moon. Clutching to the warm,
reassuring, non-psychotic body in front of you, you lower your head, cowering
from the utter terror converging on you from all possible angles. You move like
a bat out of the hell that you are now in towards what you desperately hope
is an escape. Suddenly in the hustle, you hear a scream, which is instantly
drowned out by the bloody lunatic slamming into the chain link fence mere inches
to your right. Turning back to what you figure is forward you find that the
person in front of you is gone! You’re all alone, without your trusty
guide. It’s impossible to see where to go, and a multitude of eerily loud
noises make you feel a level of discomfort unequaled by even that antiseptic
hospital smell in the doctor’s office. Wait! There’s a light up
ahead, and that looks like that lost soul formerly in front of you! Making a
mad dash to rejoin a comrade lost in the confusion of this hell you feel like
you just might get out of here. But then just as quickly as your elation hit,
all hope is lost. Your leader’s jeans and t-shirt have now become torn
rags, and that purse she was carrying is now a twelve inch machete! This is
not another horror film, it’s not a bad night in a busy, crime ridden
city, nor are you just having a bad day at a shopping spree filled with thousands
of bloodthirsty people looking for the best deal. It’s the experience
millions of Americans flock to every year. But is it really worth it? And what
does this really say about us as a people?

(The Humorous Set-up: The writer hints at the humorous tone of the paper in
the second sentence, but leaves us hanging for a bit as he describes what will
either be a truly frightening or else humorous/zany experience. By the time
he makes the “shopping spree” reference, which is tactfully placed
at the end of the (rather long) paragraph, we are prepared for the comic tone
of the paper.)

Upon observation of the facts, Halloween Horror Nights just doesn’t seem
like a worthwhile venture. Not only is it expensive, but the park is also densely
crowded. It’s plagued by bad parking, continuous walls of crowds, and
lines longer than those found at the DMV, and once again, it’s expensive.
It just doesn’t seem to be something that would attract the average American.
I don’t know too many people who like spending money, just to wait around
in different spots all night, especially when most of us can find jobs that
actually pay us to do exactly the same thing.

(Comic Rhythm: like stand-up comedy or sit-coms, a humorous essay should have
a sense of rhythm with its comic moments. Too sparse and the reader gets bored;
too frequent and he/she becomes distracted.)

The whole experience can be very aggravating. It’s actually a wonder
why so many migrate to Universal Studio’s Halloween Horror Nights. First
of all tickets start off at around $59. Deals for Florida residents notwithstanding,
that’s a lot of money, especially to the younger age group more likely
to go. To someone aged about fourteen to about twenty-five, the age group that
seems to be most widely present, sixty dollars can be a major dent in one’s
wallet. And that’s just the price of admission. Keeping with the theme
of most theme parks, sports events, insurance companies, and religious institutions,
Universal Studios squeezes you for every penny your worth. The park makes sure
that no one brings in their own merchandise. They actually physically search
you, and your belongings. Granted the reason for that is to stop the flow of
drugs, alcohol, and weapons into the park, but if they catch you bringing in
a picnic basket of sandwiches, or any outside food, they’ll make you get
rid of it before you’re allowed entry into the attraction. After they
strip you of your dignity and your carefully hand-crafted, 30 cent sandwiches,
they make sure to clean you out by overcharging every single product inside.
I remember one slice of pizza and a small drink fell somewhere in the neighborhood
of ten to fifteen dollars. Needless to say, other than a bottle of water, that
was the only purchase I made. This would logically seem like enough to drive
most people away from the attraction. As an American myself, I can tell you
the overwhelming joy we take in spending our money. So much in fact that I think
they should double the entrance fee. That’s right, and Star Wars was based
on a true story a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. But because thinning
our wallets is not enough to keep seemingly anybody from attending, Horror Nights
tries to scare us away again.

(Humorous Diction: Notice how the writer is playful with his language. The
people “migrate” to the park, like so many flocks of birds; the
play on “theme” and “theme park”; the slightly over
the top reference to “hand-crafted” sandwiches.

Too Funny? But can humor be distracting? Is the line about Star Wars funny,
or just silly? How far is too far?)

After dropping sixty dollars on a ticket, thirty or so on the trip, and another
small fortune inside, you are met with one of the most crowded locations on
earth, only beaten by the one billion plus population of China, and that’s
debatable. The lines are notoriously famous for their length. They’re
almost better known than the attractions themselves. Every time the event is
the subject of conversation, the long lines come up as an issue. The wait times
are so well known in fact, that when someone tells about hour long waits, people
show surprise, and remark about how they must be getting shorter. The average
time I’ve had to wait in the past has been no less than two hours. I’ve
never gotten into an attraction faster than forty five minutes, and that was
on a blue moon, during a planetary alignment, at the stroke of midnight. With
these wait times, you can only expect to experience a fraction of the attractions
you paid to see. In fact, when you go, you pay full well knowing that you’ll
only be seeing about two or three of the haunted houses offered. Even though
you’re carrying that lucky rabbit’s foot, you woke up on the right
side of the bed, and a part of you is hoping that somehow, someway, through
the intervention of a higher power, you will just happen to be the only person
in the world going on your night, but you know better. But because the lines
keep returning along with the event year after year, this is obviously not enough
to turn people away. But long lines and empty bank accounts aren’t the
end of the horror that is Halloween Horror Nights.

(Appropriate Comical References: Does the line about planetary alignment seem
appropriate for the subject matter? Even when trying to make the reader laugh,
the humor still manages to remain relevant and appropriate.

Transitions: notice how the last two paragraphs have similar transitional sentences
at the end. How does the writer avoid boring repetition with humor?)

Not only are the lines insanely long, the park itself is crowded beyond belief.
Just walking up to the front gates can sometimes be an act of pure agility,
speed, strength, and satellite imagery, in order to find a path through. But
once inside, nothing will help you navigate through the masses, unless of course,
you happen to be one of the few mystical humans that can fly. There is a literal
swarm of people, everywhere you look. The park’s 7 p.m. opening is like
a dinner bell to a starved wolf pack, and the place is packed tight no more
than fifteen minutes after the hoards of excited patrons are unleashed. You
and your friends find yourselves back in kindergarten, holding hands as you
travel from place to place, so as not to get lost. If the attractions aren’t
enough for you, just going from point A to point B, is an event in itself. Just
walking around, you will repeatedly find yourself in intimate contact with complete
strangers. Journeying from place to place can sometimes be an experience of
personal violation by half of the people you come across. But even the combined
issues of the price, the wait, and the can of sardines effect created by the
park’s popularity aren’t enough to turn people away.

(Again: Is this humor effective, or too much? If it’s effective, why?
If it’s too much, at what point and for what reason?)

And on in this fashion for the rest of the paper.

The Entire Paper:

Boo

The overpopulated nature of the park actually starts before you even arrive
at the entrance. The first hints that you will be herding like buffalo appear
in the vast parking garage. The parking situation is, needless to say, very,
very bad. If you don’t happen to arrive early, like say hours before the
park opens, you will probably need some additional belongings, like plane tickets,
a passport, three days of rations, and a native guide to get back from your
parking space. The parking fills up just as quickly as the park does, and the
parking garage is a good walk from the entrance of the park. They do offer valet
parking for those willing to pay, but then again, that costs money, and if you’re
like me (cheap, because I’m broke after that $60 ticket) then you’re
going to park your own car. Now for people like me, there are amenities such
as moving sidewalks to aid guests in their speedy arrival to the gates, but
a long walk, is still a long walk. Plus at the end of the night you still have
to walk back, remember your parking section, and find your lost automobile,
after spending all night walking and standing around. I’ve personally
had the experience of automotive location via remote activated security system
in that massive parking garage. It’s about as fun as, well it’s
as fun as stumbling around a huge building looking for a car you can’t
see, after you’ve been standing for a good five hours. But even with all
of these factors combined, it is just not enough to stop people from going.

So why do people keep going? What reasons would a person have to willingly
submit themselves to the torture I have just described? Why in the world would
someone spend money to be herded like cattle all night? Not surprisingly, as
it turns out, there are a number of reasons, starting with the attractions offered.
The haunted houses themselves are enough to invoke the undeniable urge to return
year after year.

The haunted houses throw each patron into their own live action horror movie.
It’s as simple as that. It’s all about the thrill and the feeling
of “don’t go in there” we all get when watching our spooky
favorites, recreated in front of our eyes. It’s no longer imagination,
it’s not drug induced hallucination, the monsters are there, right in
front of you. You can see them, hear them, touch them (and sue them because
physical contact is not allowed), and even smell them, though I wouldn’t
recommend it, cause they’re probably pretty sweaty in those costumes.
They are right there jumping out at you with the pretend intent to kill from
all angles, including above and below. Just imagine walking down a dimly lit
hall and suddenly some freakish looking guy on rollerblades smashes a trash
can into the chain link fence right next to you. Or maybe you take a turn and
another guy in a bloody jumpsuit literally jumps down from the roof and springs
back up. If this doesn’t make you flinch, the houses are flooded with
other atrocities with nothing better to do than get you to scream for mommy.
It’s the thrill of being in your own movie, the thrill of being scared,
the thrill of almost messing yourself in a near death experience that seems
to be the leading factor in the massive amounts of returns Universal receives.

The other most likely main cause of people willingly emptying their pockets
to enter the park is the experience of the park itself. Walking through the
park, as anyone who has gone can tell you, is its own attraction. Universal
really goes out of its way to scare you whenever the opportunity presents itself.
They brilliantly made us of an opportunity to do this to the roaming hoards
of people traversing their sacred ground. So with a formula that includes, some
completely psychotic costumed employees, a dark night, smoke, light, and sound
effects, a few inebriated individuals, and mass confusion, they succeed in recreating
horrors only surpassed by the real thing. And since most of us don’t get
run down by monsters with chainsaws, knives, and glowing red eyes, this is about
as good as it gets. They’ve effectively set things up, so that you never
know just when the next ghoulish creation is going to appear with a chainsaw
just inches from your face. The “monsters” themselves are so good
at what they do, that unless you have either eyes in the back of your head,
or high tech surveillance equipment, you really never know where they are. In
some instances you’ll turn to talk to a companion only to find a six and
a half foot tall zombie casually strolling along side of you. Meanwhile your
gracious friend, who felt you didn’t need warning, is running for their
life in the opposite direction. Everyone who leaves the park at some time or
the other gets attacked, and leaves with stories upon stories of how that monster
jumped them in that place, and each memory wreaks a smile upon their face.

So finally I should ask just what does all of this say about American’s?
Just how does this portray us as a people who are willing to put up the bucks
for something like this? It says two different things about us thrill seekers.
The first is that we’re fulfilling a void. Human emotion is like a lot
of things, it requires fulfillment. One of those emotions is pure and utter
fear. By traveling to Halloween Horror Nights and creating one void in our pockets,
we are effectively filling another inside of us. Along with our thirty minutes
of exercise a day quota, we’re also meeting our fear quota, in one of
the most exciting ways imaginable. It’s a lot easier, not to mention more
fun to play a game and be scared by pretenders, than to go walking blind into
the darkest alley of the worst neighborhood. We’re here, because we have
a desire, almost a need that we want to satisfy. And when it’s offered
in a way much more fun then say walking in on your parents in a state of undress,
we have every reason to take it. So the first thing all of this scary stuff
says about us American’s is that we’re filling in that pot hole
in our lives. But this isn’t the only thing we can say about us. We’re
also a population all about our most revered art form, the movies, and this
attraction is our way of being part of that.

Universal Studios is a name synonymous with movies, and they’re traditionally
known for allowing us to experience them first hand with all of their attractions.
This event of massive fear filling proportions is no exception. Horror films
are an American classic, and we all want to be in the movies sometime in our
lives anyways. So why not use a slasher film? Its seems a lot better than doing
a documentary on the buffalo of the wild, or a cheesy B romance movie, and the
horror aspect just seems like our chance to be a star, because while not everyone
can pull off a Shakespearean monologue, anyone can scream. Finally we get the
opportunity to be that group of stupid teenagers that enters the broken down
mansion, even though it should be obvious that we should run away. No longer
do we have to watch others do what we want to do. We get to be in front of the
camera, we get to be movie victims, and we get to experience our dreams. It
just proves how Hollywood we all are.

So that’s it, there it is, plain and simple. We have needs that need
to be fulfilled. Somewhere in almost everyone’s inner child is a movie
star, unless of course, you’re already a movie star. But the rest of us
hold within us a movie star that wants to feel some form of excitement. And
here is a place that offers that chance. It’s enough that we’re
willing to endure never ending lines, bankruptcy, virtual sexual harassment,
and walks equaling those taken by the ancient nomadic tribes migrating with
the mammoths. It’s an experience of a lifetime packed into a stressful
short night. Halloween Horror Nights may be a prick when it comes to convenience,
but when it comes to something we want, it’s an inconvenience we’re
willing to put up with. All of this just goes to show what we American’s
will do to get what we want.

Humanizing Your Research: Facts and Fictions

Title for the Activity:

Humanizing Your Research: Facts and Fictions

Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea:

Brittney Boykins, Jenise Hudson, Laci Mattison, and Larkin Romaneski

Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): Unknown

Title (of the essay or section): “This Would Be A Love Story”

Edition: Our Own Words 2008-2009
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available:

Goal/Purpose of the Activity:

This exercise is intended to encourage students to humanize and constitute research (and researched essays) in a creative way.

Estimated Time Required for the Activity:

30 mins.

Procedure to Follow:

Note: This exercise can be done in-class and should accompany an early draft of a research essay (such as the third paper assignment for ENC 1102 Strand II). Instructors may also opt to assign this exercise as an out-of-class journal/ assignment.

Students should complete a character sketch of an individual who must be placed within the context of their research topic. Consider: Is this person male/ female/ other? What special features does this individual have (i.e. what does he/she/it look like)? (Students could accompany their sketches with an actual rendering of what this character might look like.) What is a typical week in the life of this person? What does he/she/it like to do on weekends? What outstanding qualities does this character have? What kind of food does this person like to eat and why? (etc.)

Once the character sketch is complete, students should create a fictional situation/ situations using facts from their research into which their character can enter. Students should use at least three to five facts in their short story.

Background for the Activity:

In the process memo for “This Would Be A Love Story,” the author indicates a dissatisfaction with his level of disengagement with the first draft. Consider the first draft and how the essay becomes humanized/ engaging.

Additional Comments/ Advice:
Students should bring research to class with them for this exercise. They could bring actual articles, books, etc., or they could bring a research-integrated draft. This exercise works well when students are researching a historical event or cultural issue. As students re-imagine/ construct history, they bring a “distant” topic into their frame of reference.

Hypertextuality and Online Research

Hypertextuality and Online Research
by
Derek Phillips, Lindsey Phillips, Stacey Suver, and Travis Timmons

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words):

Title (of the essay or section): “The Suburban Generation”

Edition: Our Own Words 2005-2006
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: https://campus.fsu.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp?tab=courses&url=/bin/common/course.pl?course_id=_78866_1

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity: The purpose of this activity is to accompany either chapters 2 or
3 of The Curious Researcher so that students can develop their skills in identifying and incorporating online sources. Additionally, this exercise is designed for provoking students’ awareness of hypertextuality—a growing phenomenon today—especially its potential in linking together information. Furthermore, hypertextuality presents interesting research possibilities, in that students learn how to develop connections between a primary and secondary text, while also learning how to discerning between specifically online resources.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 50 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:

· Begin with a discussion or freewrite about hypertext to get them thinking about how different aspects of texts are interrelated.
· Divide the students into groups.
· Then have the student read “The Suburban Generation” and think of the words they would hyperlink.
· Students will research and find a corresponding webpage to link with the words they would hyperlink. For example, the students could search for a page explaining “Raiki healing.”
· Have a group discussion and make the students justify their choices for hyperlink (both the word and webpage). This would be a good place to guide the students into a discussion about good versus bad research (reliable and academic websites).

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.: You could provide examples of hyperlinked texts on the Internet and discuss why certain words are hyperlinked.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice: This exercise would work best for CWC but it can be used in traditional classroom but adjustments will need to be made. This exercise could also be used to illustrate where a student may need to insert detail in their writing. Also, this exercise could be beneficial for classes that have a zine or adbuster for the final project and it will encourage them to submit their project electronically.

I Am a Plant

Jill Koopman, Justin Anderson, Scott Gage, Desiree Johnson, Trevor Newberry, John Wang

Activity Accompanies: “Pot Was Not My Motivation, Mom” (McCrimmon Awards 2008-2009, found online at http://writing.fsu.edu/?q=node/684)

Goal/Purpose of the Activity: This activity is geared towards increasing creative thinking and understanding of metaphor and symbolism, which, in turn, helps students navigate the use of figurative language in their own writing.

Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 30 minutes

Procedure to Follow:

* Have the students read the essay (linked above) from the 2008-2009 McCrimmon Awards.

* Discuss the use of metaphor and symbolism within the text, focusing specifically on the author's use of the hydroponic plants as a conceit for the struggles and challenges which the author himself was facing: "In a sense, the hydroponic garden resembles me. Standing on its own, the garden looks self-sufficient. Delve a little deeper and you see it needs its water changed every two weeks. Another source provides it with oxygen which it can't produce on its own. The vines are strong, but require a stake to stay standing in the face of wind and weather. Essentially, this experience let me know my own strengths and weaknesses, and continually reminds me to value every day as it comes."

* Brainstorm as a group about how the symbols function as a metaphor for the writer's internal life at the time the narrative occurred. Then, have each student perform a free-write of at least 5-8 minutes in which they conjure moments or periods in their lives that hold some significance. Be sure to ask the students to (1) write about each moment as a paragraph and/or paragraphs unto itself and (2) to make sure the students leave space in at least one of the margins.

* When the students complete the free-write, have them return to each moment or time they described and, in the margin next to these reflections, invent a metaphor for who they were or what they were feeling/experiencing/struggling through/etc. at that time. This metaphor could involve something that was directly involved with the period in their lives, such as the garden, or something else that they feel best represents them at during period. Ask them to use the template: I am a ________.

* In small groups, have the students discuss how each symbol functions as a metaphor for the moment they described in the free-write.

* Optional: You might conclude the exercise with 3-5 minutes of reflective writing and/or discussion asking the students to discuss what they learned about figurative language and how they might employ it in their own work.

I See Your Point

I See Your Point (A Point of View Exercise)

Created by Julia Smith, Carla Thomas, Evan Peterson, Jill Caputo, Becca Skinner, Kelly Israel, and Ryan Hoyle

Activity Accompanies:
Above Us Only Sky
2007-2008 Edition of OOW
available at: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing06/?q=node/547

Estimated time required: 10 minutes of preparation before class, 50 minute class period (5 minutes of explanation, ten minutes of invention/interaction, twenty to thirty minutes of writing, five to fifteen minutes of sharing with the group)

Goal: To teach and engage students in writing from a single, first-person point of view

Procedure:

1) Be sure to have students read the essay for homework before the exercise. Before class, prepare slips of paper with recognizable characters on them. The characters can be general ("cowboy"), specific ("kleptomaniac"), or famous ("Bart Simpson," etc.) Students should receive their character anonymously, such as picking the paper out of a hat, etc.

2) Students will interact with one another for ten minutes, impersonating their character. You may have them try to guess one another's identity or have it be open.

3) After students have interacted, students respond to a prompt (My worst day ever, Day at the Beach, My day off, New Year’s Eve, etc.) and write in first person as their character.

4) Students are invited to read their writing aloud and discuss the process of writing about characters.

Background and Additional Comments:
This activity can be modified in a wide variety of ways. Primarily, role-playing can take a longer or shorter time depending on the teacher’s requirements. The length of time spent writing can also vary. This activity was inspired by the essay mentioned above because of its use of a narrative personae and unique point of view, integrated with research.

Interpreting Quotes

by David Arroyo and Jennifer Hartman

Activity Accompanies Darla Woodring's "The Relationship Between
the Proliferation of Eating Disorders in Women and the Sociocultural Factors/Societal
Pressures to be Thin" (2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 40-50 minutes

Goal/Purpose: Students will learn to use their critical thinking
skills when integrating quotes in their work. This exercise should help studenst
avoid regurgitating bland data and use quotes to support their own analysis
and writing. After the exercise is complete, students should have a better idea
about developing their own thoughts on a quote--distinguishing between summarty
and interpretation.

Procedure:

Divide the class into groups of 3-4 students and give each student a copy
of the essay.
Give students the following list of quotes to examine in the essay while reading
it or have them locate their own list of 5-8 quotes/paraphrasing. (10-15 minutes.)

An example of one that will work for the exercise: "In the typical American
household the television is on more than 7 hrs per day providing among other
things exposure to over 35,000 commercials per year."

When students have finished reading and examining the quotes ask them to take
5 quotes from the list and use the double entry journal to freewrite ideas about
the quote. A sample of the double entry journal can be found in the Curious
Researcher pgs 146-152. Students should divide their paper into two columns--the
quote goes in the left column and their ideas or freewriting of the quote goes
in the right (10-15min).
After students have completed the journal give them some time to share their
developed ideas with one another (10-15min)
Have students, as a group, pick one quote that they have now developed ideas
on and revise the paragraph that utilizes the quote. The revision should show
movement away from regurgitation and more toward interpretation. (10-15 min)
Have groups share their revised paragraphs with the class. (5-10 min)

Background: Curious Researcher pgs. 146-152

Additional Comments: You may want to assign reading the essay
as homework to free up class time for group work. You may also decide which
quotes you want them to look at and have a list ready ahead of time.

Introducing 1102

by Nadia Johnson and Lisa Lakes

Activity Accompanies Helen Kuncicky's “Invincible”
(2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 50 minutes

Goal/Purpose: Students will learn how to transition from the
personal voice to an academic/objective voice.

Procedure: Make individual copies of “Invincible”
for student use. Read aloud. Instructor should model shifting voice using the
teacher section. Then, place 5 students into 5 groups and assign each group
a section. Have students change diction and style from informal to formal. Have
students create a handout. Give students prepared handout (included).

“Invincible”

Teacher Model Section

[A man stood upon a bridge in northern Alabama, looking down into the swift
water twenty feet below. The man’s hands were behind his back, the wrists
bound with a cord. A rope closely encircled his neck and weights hung from his
ankles.

“Okay Charlene,” he said. “You know what to do?”

“Yes,” she replied. “If your neck doesn’t snap, I cut
the rope. If you don’t drown, I shoot you.”

“Right.”

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes, for Chrissakes.”

“You know I’m not actually going to shoot you.”

“Dammit, Charlene, I know what I’m doing. Follow the plan.”

“Ok. If you insist.”]

[He glanced up at the rusty autumn sunset for a moment, then closed his eyes,
took a deep breath, and jumped. He felt himself falling briefly, then he felt
the rope catch. Panic suddenly washed over him as pain seared through his throat.
He started gagging and knew his neck hadn’t snapped. “Cut the rope,
Charlene,” he thought. “Do it now!”

He was falling again. With a slight splash, he hit the water and sank straight
to the bottom. He tried to breathe but couldn’t. His lungs simply refused
to expand. He waited, fear growing steadily in his heart. What would it feel
like to die? Was he really prepared?

He waited for what seemed like an eternity, watching the seaweed wave back and
forth in the current. A turtle swam by very slowly, pausing to nibble at something.
Ned still couldn’t force himself to breathe.

Finally, he heard gunshots. Two. He saw two bullets shoot past him in slow
motion and bury themselves in the sandy riverbed. “Keep shooting, Charlene,”
he thought. Four more shots came, the sound somewhat muffled by the water. All
four bullets lodged themselves deep in the sand. “What the hell’s
the matter with her?” he thought.

“She’s the best shot this side of the Mississippi and she can’t
even shoot a still target from thirty feet away!”

Standing on the bridge, Charlene eyed the gun she was holding. It looked perfectly
normal, but something was not right. She had shot Ned. She knew she had shot
him. Charlene had been in the NRA for years; her daddy had taught her to shoot
when she was seven. She even knew how to adjust her aim to the refraction of
the water, so the bullet would hit its submerged mark dead on. There was no
way that she had missed him with six shots. It was impossible.]

[At the bottom of the river, Ned stood wondering just how long it would take
before his lungs burst. Suddenly a surge of the current dragged his weights
across the sand, downriver and towards the east bank. He reluctantly tried to
kick the weights toward the river’s center, but only succeeded in pushing
himself closer to land. His head popped out of the water and his lungs instantly
expanded. Gasping for breath, he saw Charlene walking towards him, her face
white as cotton.

“What the hell happened, Charlene?” he yelled. She just looked
at him.

“You forget how to shoot or somethin’?”

“I shot you, Ned,” she said slowly, her eyes wide with disbelief.
“I shot you six times. In the back.”

Ned froze. His spine began to tingle like there were hundreds of tiny spiders
having a New Year’s Eve party on his skin. Then joy surged through his
body and he nearly leaped into the air.

“Can you believe this?” he cried. “It’s true! I really
am invincible!”

“You’re not invincible, Ned. In the first place, you’re going
to get hypothermia if you don’t get dried off pretty quick. In the second
place, no one is invincible. That’s like saying you’re the next
Jesus or somethin’.”

“Maybe I am.” His reply was calm, as though he had already thought
this through.

“Oh shit,” said Charlene. “I know this is weird, but you
can’t start acting crazy on me. I must have just missed my shots. Maybe
I was subconsciously afraid to shoot you, so my hands fucked up. Don’t
turn this into some big mess. And don’t keep tryin' to get yourself killed.
If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, great.”

“I think you’re missing the point, Charlene. Two days ago I was
run over by a bus. How often do people get run over and manage to be right exactly
between the wheels? I didn’t even get a scratch. And now it seems I can’t
be hung, shot, or drowned either. This is a miracle of God, Charlene. People
need to know about this. I might be a new messiah, for all we know.”]

[“Oh no, I will not listen to this,” she said incredulously. “Ned,
you go home right now and go to bed. Take a sleeping pill if you need to. Call
me tomorrow if you’re still feeling out of sorts, ok? And for pete’s
sake, put on some dry clothes before you catch pneumonia.” Charlene shook
her head and walked up the riverbank to her car.

“I’m not crazy Charlene,” Ned called after her. “You
said yourself you shot me in the back six times. I know you didn’t slip
up. You don’t miss. Ever.” Charlene turned around.

“There’s a first time for everything, Ned. Either I miscalculated
my shots, or you are one lucky guy. That’s all there is to it.”
She got in her car and drove away quickly, without looking back.

“I am not crazy!” Ned yelled at the retreating car. He looked back
at the river flowing behind him. “There is more to this than just luck.”

Charlene woke up the next day and dragged herself into the kitchen to make
a pot of coffee. She opened the door to let the cat out, and saw the morning
paper on her doorstep. The headline read “Miracle: Local Man Defies Death”.
She immediately called Ned, but the line was busy and remained so for the next
hour. As she walked out the door to go to work, Charlene stopped to pet the
cat. “Ned is taking this too far,” she told it. “I have to
stop him. Any ideas?”

At precisely that moment, Ned was talking to a Mrs. Marie Billings, who desperately
wanted him to cure her chronic headaches. Before her, it had been old Michael
Winters, with heart problems, and before that it was Annie McLarsen wanting
to rid her youngest son of nightmares. “This miracle business is tough,”
Ned thought to himself, as he patiently tried to explain to Mrs. Billings that
he was not, as yet, a healer.

“I am a death-defier,” he told her. “My expertise has nothing
whatsoever to do with headaches. I’m still testin’ out what other
miracles I can perform, but for the time being I don’t think I could do
much for your afflictions. I’m truly sorry, ma’am.” Mrs. Billings
angrily hung up on him. Ned sighed, stretching his arms out. His phone had been
ringing nonstop since six o’clock that morning with people wanting him
to perform miracles. “I wonder if Jesus ever got this tired,” he
said aloud to the empty room. “I could use a cup of coffee.”

That evening, Charlene decided to drop by Ned’s house after work. They
had been friends for a long time and she knew from experience that once he got
his mind set on something, he absolutely did not let it go. One time, when they
were children, he had jumped off his garage fourteen times because he was sure
that he could fly if he just got the hang of it. The only reason he finally
quit trying was because his father threatened to whip him if he didn’t
get off the damn roof. Charlene was afraid Ned would keep attempting suicide,
just to prove again that it couldn’t be done.]

[She turned onto Ned’s street and saw police cars lined up against the
curb. Her hands began shaking as she drove closer. “Maybe they’re
just asking him questions,” she said, trying to calm herself down.

She parked the car and walked up to Ned’s house, and her heart dropped
into her stomach. An ambulance sat in the driveway, but the sirens were off
and there was no frantic hustle to get to the emergency room. Instead, a stretcher
was being wheeled out slowly, covered with a white sheet. Charlene’s body
slowly started to go numb.

“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed to be here,”
a cop tapped Charlene on the shoulder, startling her into dropping her purse.
He picked it up for her.

“I’m a friend of Ned’s…is he…” she couldn’t
finish the question.

“I’m terribly sorry,” the cop said, his eyes blank. “I
just can’t believe it, it was so strange. We reckon he was making coffee
and the machine went haywire. Water flew everywhere, and he got electrocuted.
You can even see where part of his hand melted onto the coffee pot. The chances
for something like this happening are one in a million.” He looked down
at her and noticed the distress in her face. “Aw hell, I’m sorry,
ma’am, I wasn’t supposed to say anything. I, uh, I mean, you must
be in shock. Is there anything I can do?”

“No,” Charlene replied. “I’m fine. I just need to go
home and…and…”

“Ok ma’am,” the cop interrupted, “I’ll just need
to get your number in case we need to contact you. Just a formality.”

“Right,” Charlene said. They exchanged cards, and she walked slowly
back to her car. She drove home carefully and went straight to bed, feeling
exhausted from the inside out.

That night she dreamed that she and Ned were fish. They were swimming along
playfully when Ned suddenly shot up towards the water’s surface. Too late,
she saw the thin line reaching from his mouth up into a tiny boat. While she
swam around in circles underneath it, she heard the rip of Ned’s flesh.
His head plopped into the water, and she watched it sink slowly into the darkness.
If only she had seen the line before he took the bite…

Charlene woke up in a cold sweat. She went downstairs and poured herself a
glass of orange juice. She opened the door to let the cat out and saw a new
paper lying on her doorstep. The headline read, “Invincible Man Killed
by Coffee Maker”.]

Levels of Language-Handout

Formal Style

Often used in legal documents, scholarly articles, technical and scientific
reports, and formal academic papers
Considerable distance between writer and readers
Serious topics
Serious tone
Many long sentences
>li>Abstract and specialized vocabulary
Few personal references
Few contractions
Few action verbs

Informal Style

Often used in newspapers, popular magazines, Web pages, memos, and less formal
academic assignments
Moderate distance between writer and readers.
Mix of topics
Conversational tone
Mix of long and short sentences
Mix of abstract and concrete vocabulary
Occasional personal references
Occasional contractions
Mix of active and passive verbs

Casual Style

Often used in personal writing, fiction, casual conversation, and friendly
email
Almost no distance between writer and readers
Often personal or everyday topics
Relaxed tone
Short to medium-length sentences
Concrete language, slang
Frequent personal references
Many contractions
Many action verbs

This chart is taken from The Scott Foresman Handbook for Writers 7th ed. p. 267.

Writing for ENC 1102-Handout

English 1102 requires a different type of writing than English 1101. For the
most part, 1101 focused on your thoughts and opinions. In 1102, it is still
acceptable to incorporate yourself in the paper but you must also move beyond
your immediate realm of thinking. It is now time to think critically and analytically
about texts. Below are suggestions.

Review the assignment

Read the assignment carefully. Then, plan ahead. Think about what materials will be needed for the assignment. Remember, libraries do not carry every book, magazine, and journal. You may need to request books through inter-library loan or visit multiple libraries.
Narrow your topic

Limit your topic so that it can be discussed fully within the page limit. Writing
an outline may prove helpful at this point. An outline will help with staying
on-topic.
Support your claims and opinions with various reasons and evidence

Offer reasons, examples, and evidence for any opinions or claims you make in
your paper. College instructors are skeptical and it is your responsibility
to prove that your argument is valid.
Understand the difference between academic writing and pop culture writing

Academic writing requires more formal diction and relies heavily on current
supporting materials. Compare a popular magazine article with an academic article
written on the same subject. What are the differences between the two articles?
You should expect differences in language, style, and length. Also, most popular
magazines do not rely heavily on multiple sources.
Document sources and give credit

You must use parenthetical documentation (cite sources within the body of the
essay) and you must include a works cited page for any sources used within the
paper. Also, credit the author for any information that was paraphrased.
Follow research and writing conventions for your subject area

Understand the goals and approaches valued in your discipline. The humanities,
social sciences, and the natural sciences privilege different methodologies.
Know the methodologies for your area. If unsure, ask the instructor. Also, find
out if you need to follow APA, MLA, or Chicago Manual Style.
Submit a polished, professional draft. Proofread your paper and submit it as directed by your instructor. Word-process
papers, double space, and make sure you follow your instructor’s font
guidelines. Number all of your pages. Fasten your paper with a staple or paper
clip. Remember, your instructor’s guidelines take precedence. Please follow
your instructor’s directions.

This information was taken from chapter seven in The Scott Foresman Handbook
for Writers.

John Stewart Mish Mash

By Matt Price, Kevin Carr, Liz Jackson, Sarah Unruh, Stefanie Pickett, Tony Ricks, and Azita Osanloo

Activity Accompanies "The Impact of John Stewart" (2008-2009 OOW)

Time Required: 30-45 minutes

Goal/Purpose: This activity can help students improve critical reading skills and understand the main idea of paragraphs, while also demonstrating how visual images and text can reinforce one another. More often than not students have difficulty locating the point of their paragraphs and how each paragraph works together towards a completed whole. This activity works best with 1101 classes in the CWC, and courses that do zines.

Procedure:

* Break up class into groups of 2 or 3. If you are not in a CWC you could divide the class the day before the activity, and ask them to bring their laptops.
* Have the students read “The Impact of John Stewart” individually for 10 minutes. While reading they should underline the main point of each paragraph.
* Then each group should discuss what they underlined, and then begin to look for images online that correspond to the main idea of each paragraph. If you are in CWC then you should have them cut and paste the essay into word or NVu so that they can paste images into the document.
* Then the students should write brief captions to their images which describe how the image corresponds to the paragraph.
* At the end of class, each group will present their interpretation to the rest of class.

Background for the Activity: Considering that our students get their daily news from shows like Jon Stewart’s, our group came to the conclusion that students could begin to understand how these programs work rhetorically, while examining how to achieve an effective paragraph.

Additional Comments: Our group believes that this activity can be successful in a non CWC classroom. However, it might be a good idea to space the activity over two classes instead of one. For a regular classroom, one could let the students read and discuss, then work on embedding images into their document, or transform it into a power point. For non-CWC classrooms the teacher should, probably, have a day of presentations where the class and the teacher can engage how each group integrated the visual with the texts.

Make It Interesting / Make Me Want to Read It

Make It Interesting/Make Me Want to Read It

Lamar Garnes

This is a voice activity in which I make the students aware of the fact that many of their papers lack personality and that many of them sound exactly alike. This exercise is an attempt to realize that their papers do not have to be as dry as they tend to be. I pull first sentences from some of their papers and first sentences from published sources and mix them up. None of them are identified. I put them on the overhead and the students rank the sentences from most interesting to least interesting. Usually, their sentences are at the bottom of the list, and often, many of the writers do not recognize their own sentences.
After I point out which sentences are which, we then discuss why they ranked the high sentences as high as they did. We discuss voice and how the writers seem to get right into what they are writing about. I then challenge them to rewrite their first sentences. After they feel like they have successfully done this, they share their sentences and discuss why it is better or worse than the original sentence.
As a final part of the exercise, I challenge the students to maintain the voice throughout he first paragraph, and as a requirement for the next draft, they have to deal with voice and sustain an interesting voice throughout the paper, which shows that they are conscious of the audience.

Sample First Sentences:

“The fellas and I were hanging out on our corner one afternoon when the strangest thing happened. A white boy, who appeared to be about eighteen or nineteen years old, came pedaling a bicycle casually through the neighborhood” (3).
Nathan McCall Makes Me Wanna Holler

“He came to kill the preacher. So he arrived early, extra early, a whole two hours before the evening service would begin” (193).
Edwidge Danticat The Dew Breakers

“By our second day a Camp Crescendo, the girls in my Brownie troop had decided to kick the asses of each and every girl in Brownie Troop 909” (1).
Z.Z. Packer “Brownies”

“I was fourteen that summer. August brought heat I had never known, and during the dreamlike drought of those days I saw my father for the first time in my life” (1)
William Henry Lewis “Shades”

“My desert-island, all-time, top five most memorable split-ups, in chronological order:
1. Alison Ashworth
2. Penny Hardwick
3. Jackie Allen
4. Charlie Nicholson
5. Sarah Kendrew” (3).
Nick Hornsby High Fidelity

“I was born twice: first, as a baby girl, on a remarkably smogless Detroit day in January of 1960; and then again, as a teenage boy, in an emergency room near Petosky, Michigan, in August of 1974” (3).
Jeffrey Eugenides Middlesex

“I lost an arm on my last trip home. My left arm” (9).
Octavia Butler Kindred

“I was born in a toilet.”
Anonymous Medical School Personal Statement from Lisa Lakes

Sample First Paragraphs/Pages

“I started with a dress. A hot little thing. A spaghetti-strapped Armani number, with a skintight bodice and a long flowing skirt, in that shade of orange that black girls do the most justice. I bought it in La-La Land precisely because it reminded me of New York in the seventies, with its sexy sistas (girls with names like Pokie, Nay-Nay, Angela, and Robin) and those leotard and dance skirt sets they used to rock back in the day. This was back when I was a shorty with cherries for breast and absolutely no ass to speak of. I used to sit on our tenement stoop mesmerized by the way those flimsy little tops knew how to hug a tittie in all the right places, or the way a proper Bronx Girl Switch (two parts Switch to one part Bop) could make the skirts move like waves. Wide-eyed, I watched regal project girls transform into Black Moseses capable of parting seas of otherwise idle Negroes.
“And I couldn’t wait to be one” (17).
Joan Morgan When Chickenheads Come Home to Roost

“I’m deep inside Paisley Park. Past the front hallways where walls are painted sky blue with real looking clouds and the ceiling is night navy with stars and cosmos. Past walls filled with platinum and gold album plaques—some commemorating sales in Sweden, Germany, Japan, Portugal, Australia. Past the doves that live there. I’m in the back, in the rehearsal room, where, on one end there’s a stage, and on the other end, amid some plush couches and sound mixing boards, there’s a basketball hoop. It’s a little bit too high.
“I’m playing two-on-two. My teammate? Guess who. He’s pretty good. He jitterbugs around the court, a sleek little lightning bug in red and white high-tops, so fast he’ll leave a defender stranded and looking stupid if a defender ain’t careful. So I’ve got the ball at the top of the key and I’m dribbling and I see he’s in good position under the basket. I flick a quick pass toward him. The ball is floating through the defense safely, then I realize he doesn’t know it’s coming. Instinctively, I call out to him. The man I’ve none, sort of, for fifteen or twenty years. The man who, like Sinatra for another generation, made our official lovemaking music. I call out, ‘Prince!’
“But he’s not Prince anymore! What happens if you call him prince now? No doubt, he’ll storm out of the room and banish you from the Paisley Palace! Titanic faux pas! But before the second part of the word slips out, before I can say more than ‘Pr—‘ I catch myself, put my hands over my mouth, and watch the ball fly out of bounds, thankful I caught myself before … Then, he smirks and says happily, and to no one in particular, ‘He didn’t know what to call me.’ Laughing with my quandary, forgiving my mistake, and being, just, cool. He didn’t know what to call me (248-9).
Toure “You Can Call Him Prince” [Icon Magazine 1998]

Out from under the Rug

“Out from under the Rug” Activity (2006-07 OOW)
by
Erin Moore

Time Required: 15-50 minutes per exercise

Goal / Purpose: Teaches students to think about stories/their own papers from a different perspective. Reinforces the revision process.

Procedure:
1. Rewrite this story from the perspective of another character. Divide the students into groups and assign each group a different character: Madison, Aidan, Mrs. Halbrook, Landon. You may wish to have students do a brief character sketch first and then rewrite a specific scene. This exercise will help students begin to think about their own papers from a different perspective.

2. Rewrite the story with a different ending. Since this story is very dramatic, anything could happen. Have students rewrite the ending of the story:
a. Rory ends up with Landon
b. Rory breaks up with Aidan
c. Rory decides to be single
d. Landon and Aidan fight over Rory
e. Madison confesses her love for Aidan, Landon or Rory

3. Exploding the Moment. Pick sentences from the story that could be described/explained in more detail. Some possible sentences/moments to expand:
a. “She knew exactly why she had blurted out Australia and it was not good. That was where they (Rory and Landon) were supposed to have gone together for their wedding.” After reading the story, have students describe the scene in which Rory and Landon decide to get married in Australia.

b. Aidan tells Rory, “Oh, would the other part have something to do with the guy in the laundry cart yesterday?” Have students write a scene that describes what could have happened with the guy and the laundry cart.

c. Mrs. Halbrook said, “Mr. Halbrook just got a call from Buddy, the caretaker of our ranch back home. Something about him shooting some man trespassing on our property.” Have students expand this sentence into a scene by thinking about the following questions: Who is Buddy? Who trespassed on the property? What happened to make Buddy shoot the trespasser?

Background for the Activity: Students often dislike revising, particularly at the beginning of ENC 1101. They feel that whatever they’ve written is set in stone and cannot be changed. These exercises which focus on rewriting a story show students that revising is possible and can even improve a paper.

Point of View Switcheroo

Point of View Switcheroo
by
Cassie Casiano

Essay: “How the Public Schools Changed My Life”
Available at: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/book/view/432
The goal of this activity is for students to explore changing point of view as a revision strategy. It also deals with age-appropriate voice techniques.

Estimated Time Required for the Activity: Depending on how many “journal entries” you request students to revise, this could take anywhere between 15 and 45 minutes.

First, have students read all or part of “How the Public Schools Changed My Life.” Then discuss the age-appropriate voice and its evolution. Look at language and observations. Have the students look for alternative narrators in each entry. For example, the teachers. Ask how this might change both the observations and language. Students are then to revise (a) section(s) in one of two ways. 1) Rewrite the entry from the point of view of the adult student looking back. 2) Rewrite the entry from the point of view of another character mentioned in the original entry. For instance, have the teacher discussed in each entry narrate the student’s story from an external P.O.V.

This exercise was originally designed for use within a short story writing assignment, but point of view can also be played with in personal essays.

Put Your Heart on the Page

1. Title for the Activity: Put Your Heart on the Page

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea: Kara Candito, Chris Findeisen, Lamar Garnes, Ashley Harris, Fayaz Kabani, Rebecca Lehmann, Lessig, Colin Lessig, Toby McCall, & Jenny Moffit

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): Allison Rose

Title (of the essay or section): “Sing with Me Somehow”

Edition: 2007-2008
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing06/?q=node/550

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:
This is an exercise to help students write with emotion. This exercise is from the book What If? By Anne Bernays and Pamela Painter. They state,
Too many writers avoid their own strongest feeling because they are afraid of them, or because they are afraid of being sentimental. Yet these are the very things that will make beginning work ring true and affect us. Your stories have to matter to you the writer before they can matter to the reader; your story has to affect you, before it can affect us.
The essay, “Sing with Me Somehow” is an excellent example of a writer doing just that.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 50-65 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:

1) The students should have read the essay before class. At the beginning of class, have a short discussion about how the essay affected them emotionally. Did they think it was too sentimental? Did they feel the author’s emotion? Do they think that the author cares about what she is writing? Why is it important to care? Also, discuss what techniques the author uses to convey her emotions and different times in the essay.
2) After the discussion, have each student go to a computer or take out a piece of paper and make a journal entry about a childhood event or memory that brought some kind of strong emotion into his or her lives. It might be fear, happiness, anger, revenge, etc. Then they should write that story. They should try to bring us back to that time so that we can feel the emotion that they felt. Have them utilize some of the same techniques that the author of “Sing with Me Somehow” uses.
2) After they are finished writing, have volunteers read their stories aloud. Then, have the students discuss what kind of emotions that person’s story evoked. Discuss what techniques the author uses to evoke those emotions and perhaps some places that need more description and detail.
3) Finally, ask them what they think the point of this exercise is. Hopefully, they will be able to answer with ease, but if not, explain to them that if they can capture their emotions and put them on the paper, then the reader will be able to feel the same emotion as them. Therefore, they will be making a connection with their readers.
7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s), which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:
This exercise is in the book What If? Writing Exercises for Fiction Writers, 2nd Edition by Anne Bernays and Pamela Painter
8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

We would recommend this activity when the students are writing personal essays or short stories. It also goes along with the Show, Don’t Tell exercise on the Ink Well, if you wanted to do them back to back.

Puzzle Pieces

Puzzle Pieces
by
Dara Green, Brianna Noll, Danielle Boudreaux

Activity Accompanies:
Author (from Our Own Words): unknown prospect?
Title (of the essay or section): “Adaptations, Limitations, and Imitations”
Edition: (2006-2007)
URL: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/book/view/456

Goal/Purpose of the Activity: The author of “Adaptations, Limitations, and Imitations” wrote in a process memo that he/she initially encountered difficulty trying to organize the paper logically, but the final draft was structured beautifully. This activity should help students identify effective and creative transitions in the essay by restructuring the final draft. It should also show them how to allow the connecting ideas to serve as the transition in an essay vs. only using one-word transitions.

Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 25- 35 minutes

Procedure to Follow:
· Beforehand, make five copies of the essay and cut them up, separating the different paragraphs. (Numbering the paragraphs out of order may help in discussion).
· Divide the class into no more than five groups, with 4-5 students in each group. Give each group one dismantled essay and ask them to put the pieces together in “logical” order. This may take about 20 minutes.
· Students should discuss amongst themselves 1) the essay’s progression 2) what the transitions are 3) the lack of “obvious” conclusion (In brief, In Conclusion).
· As a class, ask students how they organized the essay and why. (This is where the prior numbering would come in handy. For example, the group would be able to easily say “We think paragraph D goes first, etc). Ask them to identify the connecting ideas for each paragraph of the essay (i.e. the second paragraph connects to the introduction because it continues the anecdote about the writer’s sophomore year of high school). If the different groups disagree about where the paragraphs go, ask them to explain why they think their transition works better.

Radical Revision Activity: Not the Same Old Story

By:
Sarah Grieve
Lucy Littler
Fatima Rashid
Liane Robertson
Kara Taczak
Lydia Yaitsky

Our Own Words -- Teaching Activity
Essay: Why me God?
Author: Ashley Metcalf

The 2007/08 McCrimmon Award-nominated essay, Why me God, stands as an excellent example of a final product that students can use to explore its writer’s process. This teaching activity is designed to make students take a critical look at the process of another writer, while exploring the concept of radical revision and how a “finished” story can be re-seen through new perspectives.

Time allotment: 75 minutes

Activity Detail: Radical Revision

Explain the concept to the class, stressing the importance of re-seeing the project from different perspectives and through different “lenses” that can produce interesting new work.
Read the draft together as a class.
Talk about the draft discussing strengths and weaknesses. Bring up things like linearity, showing vs. telling, use of dialogue, etc.

Divide class (of 25) into 5 groups. Each group is assigned one type of radical revision.
1. Collage—break the linear time by creating snapshots that will reveal the story with out relying on a set sequence of events.
2. Form—develop a series of phone calls, emails, diary entries, etc. that reveal the story through one or more characters’ perspectives.
3. Explode a moment—zoom in on one crucial moment and explode it into a story all on its own focusing on intense development of sensory details and dialogue.
4. Genre—turn the narrative into a script for a movie or a play focusing on stage directions, director’s notes, and dialogue.
5. Rewind—maintain the linear plot line but move backwards from beginning to end focusing on when and how to reveal crucial points in the story and attempting to create a sense of suspense in your reader.

Share radical revisions with the class, noting new discoveries and interesting developments in the work.
Have students brainstorm individually about how they might apply a radical revision strategy to their own work.

Background:

This teaching activity was inspired by our ongoing challenges in teaching students that revision is more than editing, and that any story can be revised to create a new perspective. Without a sense of what can be accomplished in the revision process, students often struggle with finding a way to make their own revision effective or to help others explore possibilities for revision when conducting peer review. By engaging in an activity that forces new perspectives on a “finished product” to emerge, students can better understand the potential within revision.

Comments:

• This activity can be conducted over two class periods, with the Genre activity acting as homework, and a transition from one class period to the next.
• We recommend a Journal Entry assignment allowing students to reflect on learnings and on applications to their own essays, following the activity.
• This activity work well as a precedent to a peer review session that asks reviewers to apply the “radical revision” model suggestions to peer work.

Radical Revision Exercise

by Siobhan Welch, Ilia Cuesta, and Jennifer Wolford

Activity Accompanies Blake Powers' “Beneath the Smile”
(2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: Entire Class period, preferably an hour fifteen
minutes class.

Goal/Purpose: “Beneath the Smile” is a creative
essay, very much like a short story, that contains inconsistencies in tense.
The essay centers around three characters: Leonard the Clown, his wife Nicole,
and the child, Bobby. The essay is written in the third person perspective of
Leonard.

Objective: To teach students radical revision techniques;
specifically, to show students that changing the point of view or tense in an
essay or story will often lead them to make unexpected discoveries in their
writing.

Procedure:

Have class read the essay for homework.
Discuss elements of the essay, particularly perspective and tense. Point
out inconsistencies in tense.
Divide the class into groups of four.
Have half of the groups rewrite the essay in present tense. The other half
of the groups will rewrite the essay in past tense. Emphasize the importance
of keeping tenses consistent.
Have groups read portions of the rewritten essay. Discuss what the effects
are of present tense versus past tense.
Have the groups rewrite the story (or a portion, depending on time) from
another character’s perspective (either Nicole or Bobby).
Discuss how the story changed. Discuss how students can apply radical revision
techniques in their papers.

Sharpening Structure: Structure of a Research Essay

1. TITLE OF EXERCISE

Sharpening Structure: Structure of a Research Essay

2. NAME (OF TA)

Nahal Suzanne Jamir

3. ESSAY (FROM OOW)

“Liam O’Flaherty’s ‘The Sniper’ and the Irish Civil War (by ?)
Our Own Words
2008-2009 edition
http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/?q=node/635

4. GOAL

The goal of this exercise is to examine structure as it works in conjunction with an essays controlling idea (thesis statement). Most students forget or are told to forget the five-paragraph essay form. Then, however, students are not sure what to think about structure. If they receive any instruction about structure in ENC 1101, it is most likely in the context of personal writing, more creative writing. This exercise provides a way to examine the practical, almost natural, way in which structure can be teased out of one sentence, a statement of an essays controlling idea. This activity makes outlining less arbitrary and more fruitful for students writing research essays.

*The essay chosen is about a short story, so this essay can be used by TAs teaching ENC 1142 who are having students write a case study on an author’s work or by TAs teaching literature in ENC 1145.

5. TIME

At least 30 minutes.

I have found that when dealing with a sample essay, it is best to deal with it in sections. For this exercise in particular, the class should all read only the first two paragraphs and then discuss those. I like to proceed two paragraphs at a time so that students are forced to be specific about the work each paragraph is trying to do. Breaking up the activity between reading time and discussion time prevents monotony/boredom.

6. PROCEDURE

I begin by showing students how a barebones outline can be pulled out of a controlling idea/thesis statement. I use a sample thesis statement from the UNC Writing Center’s web site:
Through its contrasting river and shore scenes, Twain's Huckleberry Finn suggests that to find the true expression of American democratic ideals, one must leave "civilized" society and go back to nature.
With the thesis statement displayed, I ask my students what the key terms are in this
thesis statement. I circle/highlight key terms. Then, I ask my students to help me
construct a barebones outline for the essay that this thesis statement belongs to. Students
will eventually get to a basic structure that alternates between river and shore scenes in
the novel.

After setting up as described above, we begin work with the essay from OOW. I have
students number the paragraphs. Students read only the first paragraph of this essay. Students find the thesis statement. We decide on key terms and construct another barebones outline.

The class continues reading two paragraphs at a time. I proceed in this manner to keep us
all attentive but also to have students remember the task. Additionally, proceeding in this
way forces students to speak specifically, about paragraphs, rather than more vaguely
about the essay overall. Reading just a few paragraphs at a time also shows just how solid
structure is important for purposes of audience because we see a point or points where the
class as a whole begins to question the essay too much.

As we progress through paragraphs, I write notes on the board for Paragraph #1, etc., and
these notes are about the paragraphs main point and function in relation to the thesis.

Initially, we get into conversations about relevant research. We discuss how much background material an essay needs up front. Then, we discuss uses of research that are not relevant to the author’s controlling idea/thesis, though the research may be related to the subject matter of the author’s project. We also discuss use and placement of summary (of literary and research sources). Perhaps the most important lesson my students learn from this activity is that key terms set up in an essays introduction can and should dominate the essay for purposes of clarity and cohesion.

7. BACKGROUND

I constructed this activity because my students were struggling, and it was easy to see that they were having trouble negotiating the large number of texts that a research project entails. Having them try outlining only seemed natural. However, I found that most of my students’ outlines were arbitrary, like a shopping list. So, I decided to use a sample essay to get us into a practical discussion about structure.

Prior to conducting this exercise, my students had done exercises with thesis statements in which we discussed the use of key terms. I pushed my students to realize that key terms are not the property of an intellectual or a published author. Any word or phrase can be set up as a key term.

Show Don't Tell / Conveying Emotion without "Feeling"

by Jason Nemec and Mike Croley

Activity Accompanies Allison Griffo's "The Fall of a Legend"
(2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 30 minutes

Goals/Purpose: Tired of students beating their reader over
the head with repeated phrases which “show but don’t tell”?
Then this exercise is for you; it could function in either ENC 1101 or 1102.
To demonstrate to students that unvarying, recurring phrases can function as
distractions and consequently weaken a paper. In “The Fall of a Legend,”
for example, the introductory phrase “I felt…” is used nearly
ten times to show, obviously, how the author felt about various parts of her
experience with the tap legend Gregory Hines. Might there be a better way to
convey this? Our exercise will have students brainstorm tactics for how to vary
these phrases and make the paper more detailed and interesting.

Procedure:

Have students get into groups of 4 and instruct them to find the recurring
phrases throughout the paper.
Students should discuss if and why these phrases are harmful to the paper.
Do they weaken the essay? If so, how?
Instruct students to rewrite all of the “I felt…” phrases
without using "I felt" Techniques such as “exploding the moment”
might be effective here if they need more direction. Give examples: e.g. In
the final paragraph, the writer says, "Pulling out the picture from the
performance, I suddenly felt calm and relaxed..." A better way to state
this might be, "Pulling out the picture from the performance, noticing
the excited look on my face mixed with concentration, waves of serenity washed
over me." (Yes, this is an extreme example, but you get the point)
Upon completion, each group must then share their best ‘modification’
with the rest of the class.

Sour Milk or Honey?

by Quentin James, Mark Palz, Jordan Lari, Susanna Childress

Activity Accompanies Yeniva Figueora's "The Land of Sour Milk
and Honey" (2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 25-30 minutes

Goal/Purpose: The exercise can be used to introduce issues
of cultural and personal awakening and to examine stereotypes or prejudices.
The essay and the exercise can be used in conjunction with a personal narrative
assignment.

Procedure:

Have students freewrite for 5 minutes or so about both the essay “The
Land of Sour Milk and Honey” and their own experiences with new surroundings
and how they adjusted. Ask them to discuss their hesitancy in the new situation
and what allowed them to feel more comfortable or confident.
On the same sheet of paper, have students make a list about how others perceive
them: “hotshot,” “naïve,” “generous,”
“lazy”; students should also make a list of how they perceive themselves
or how they portray themselves, which might not contrast the first list but
should take it into consideration.
Have students get into groups of 3-4 and discuss the ideas introduced in
both their freewrites and their lists. Instructor might want to ask specific
questions so that students address the issues of stereotyping others as well
as allowing themselves to be stereotyped.
As an entire group, have students share their ideas and how their discussions
were informed or inspired by the essay. While not all of these issues will be
culturally or ethnically related, those elements of the discussion might be
highlighted to discuss the greater issues of nationalism, ethnocentrism, etc.
Finish by having each student write a letter to him or herself five years
from now, one in which he or she discusses the “new surroundings experience”
as well as how he or she would like to grow, change, or reclaim some part of
his or her identity. Direct students to address the issues you have just discussed
in terms of stereotyping others and being stereotyped. (OPTIONAL: For the next
class, have each student bring a stamped envelope with his or her permanent
address and seal the letter inside. Instructor can collect these letters and
keep them to send back to the students in five years!)

Background for the Activity: “The Land of Sour Milk
and Honey”; other suggested readings: “Silent Dancing” by
Judith Ortiz Cofer and “The Cult of Ethnicity, Good and Bad” by
Arthur M. Schlesinger Jr., both from Convergences. Through extensive conversation
among our group we came to the conclusion that before writing about themselves,
students must first get a better understanding of who exactly they are.

Additional Comments: The discussion topics we have suggested
have a potential to make students feel very vulnerable. A continuously comfortable,
safe classroom environment will need to be previously instated so that students
will not feel nervous sharing their thoughts on themselves or their experiences.
Nevertheless, the instructor might want to monitor the discussions carefully
and make sure the students are responding and behaving appropriately to one
another. The instructor might also want to ensure the students that the contents
of the letter will be confidential and that even the instructor will not be
grading or evaluating them.

Studibagels

Studibagels
by Ashley Montjoy and Beth Wylder

Activity Accompanies Allison Sudfeld's “Studibagels” (2004-2005 OOW)

Goals/Purpose: “Studibagels” is an essay from the 2004 version of OOW. The instructions were to create a “visual narrative” about a place that was of personal significance to the author. In this case, the student didn’t a good job of creating visual imagery, but failed to use such imagery as means of support for, or creation of, a topic. In other words, the descriptions are vivid, but the essay lacks a purpose or point: it’s just a stack of images.

Procedure:

The following is a revision exercise which works to fuse the student’s visual imagery with a sense of direction, or purpose, for the essay.

1. Pick a particular paragraph or two that peaks your interest.
2. Circle any concrete images/phrases that the student used in the paragraph. In this essay, images relate to one of the five senses (taste, touch, smell, sight, sound).
3. Choose 10 of your favorite images.
4. Using approximately 2-5 of the phrases you circled, create an introductory paragraph for the essay. Remember: introductions are often a paragraph or two. By using the original visual imageries in the essay, you will create a direction for the existing essay. Be sure to maintain focus; that is, make sure your chosen direction still emphasizes a particular place.
5. After writing the new introductory paragraph write a brief statement of intent. Could the use of your imagery be strengthened to create a metaphor for this essay? Having created a new introduction, what direction does it now set up for the rest of the essay?

Symbols of Memory

Symbols of Memory
by Ashley Denham. Ashley McKelvy, Ali Salerno

Activity Accompanies Na Tach's, “Red Hibiscus”

Time Required: If the essay is read in class, this exercise can take all 50 minutes; if essay is read as homework, about 35 minutes.

Goal/Purpose: This could be the jumping-off point for a paper topic or could simply be used to teach the use of sensory detail and memory to express emotions.

Procedures:

1. Students should read “Red Hibiscus” as a class.
2. In the essay, the author employs a specific object and describes it using sensory detail in order to show its connection to a meaningful relationship in the past. The red hibiscus thus becomes a symbol of her memories. Individually, students should choose an object that is important to them and free write for 15 minutes (total—5 minutes for each section) on each of the following:
* a specific person it is related to
* a specific place it reminds them of
* and a specific memory of an event that it conjures in their minds
3. Students should be sure to use concrete sensory detail in their descriptions: what does the object look like? Feel like? Smell or taste like? Where did it come from? Does it have other associations attached to it? For example, in “Red Hibiscus” the author describes what the hibiscus flower represents to other people.
4. Once they have free written, ask a couple of students to share their object and its associated descriptions/memories. Then ask students to respond with their own associations with those objects and the memories the author’s free-writes may have sparked. This hopefully should lead to a discussion about meaning being relative and the importance of sensory detail in appealing to a reader’s emotions.

Background for the Activity: Any short story or poem that makes use of sensory detail may be helpful as an example.

Additional Comments: If students seem to be having trouble thinking of an object, ask them to remember an event or a place from childhood (or high school even) and then look around, mentally, at the objects present in that memory. Then, ask them to describe it using each of the five senses.

This exercise is similar to “What Is It?” by Kelly Tompkins, but takes her exercise a step further.

The View from Above: Making it New with Imagery

The View from Above: Making it New with Imagery
by Matthew Corey

Activity Accompanies Autumn T. Harrell's “Trolley Square” (2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: 35-50 minutes

Goal/Purpose: To instruct students in the composition of insightful imagery to include in either prose or poetry. Additionally, to open for discussion the nature of imagery and how it works to make for inventive, effective writing.

Procedure:

1. To prepare them to carry out this exercise, ask students to bring with them the current draft of an essay/poem on which they’re-working and distribute a copy of “Trolley Square” to each group.
2. Before class, prepare a list of non-place-specific nouns in the poem (i.e. “shingles,” “steel pipes,” “ceiling,” and “pizza shop,” but not “Trolley Square” as students may not be familiar with such) for group distribution, print this and cut it into strips – two or more nouns per strip should work nicely.
3. At the beginning of class, inform the students that imagery can work as a window into the perspective of their viewer – including such imagery allows the reader to share the author’s viewpoint. As it functions in “Trolley Square,” the images used work as a porthole onto not only the view of the square and its inhabitants but also into the emotional realm of its narrator. Also, it may help to discuss how the use of imagery can make a plain or stale noun fresh, vivid and new.
4. After forming groups of 3-5, distribute the lists of nouns with one strip of paper going to each group. Ask the groups to find their pre-selected nouns in the poem and have them discuss, briefly, how the author approached this. How does the image work? Is metaphor present? Simile? Are the images used in conjunction with the noun concrete or abstract? 5. Have each student make a series of lists, using the chosen nouns as a title for each. Then, ask them to brainstorm imagery in connection with each noun: these should include metaphors and similes, concrete images and abstract ones. They should come up with five to seven of these for each list. It may help to direct the students to create an image for each sense.
5. Prompt each group to compare the imagery and description that each member has devised. Then, have them choose which they believe are the most effective images of the lot and discuss why they work so well. Ask the groups to present the product of this exercise to the class – that is, the images that they found most interesting.
6. After disbanding the groups, invite each student to extract from their current draft of an essay/poem a group of nouns, perhaps three, that could benefit from a more expressive image-base. Prompt them to compose, on an individual basis, a similar list for each noun – they should select the most effective and consider applying these to their existing draft. 8. After such an exhausting procedure, it will certainly help to ground students by reviewing the benefits of including imagery and then discussing its practical application.

Additional Comments: An optional free-write may also work to ground students: ask them to think of an place that is close to them and describe it in great detail.

Unpacking the Object

Unpacking the Object
by Nicholas Allin

Activity Accompanies Philip Cory Cloud's "Home" (2004-2005 OOW)

Time Required: If it’s used as an icebreaker (everyone required to share—and I would recommend that), the activity could take the whole class period. If not, 20-30 minutes should do it.

Goal/Purpose: Like “Hypertext” from the Inkwell, this activity serves two purposes: 1) to promote class discussion, especially during the first few classes; and 2) to introduce students to the idea of using descriptive details when they write (this exercise may be most effective with the Visual Strand).

Procedure:

Have someone read “Jesus Lives” out loud.
Using the poem as an example, ask the students to:

Think of an object that you have come in contact with for as long as you can remember: a children’s book or a piece of jewelry, a stuffed animal, a picture, a rock, a machete.

I use the example of my raccoon puppet, Eric, who has traveled everywhere with me since I was four (he’s loafing on my desk as I type this exercise). Their pens should not have hit the paper yet. Give them a minute to picture their object fully. Now ask them to write according to the following questions (they don’t have to hit each one):

What is the object? Where is it? Where are you? What does it smell like? What color is it? What does it look like? Who does it remind you of? What is its texture? You’re starving. You figure, “Why not?” You eat the object. What does it taste like? You shake the object. What does it sound like?

Do you, like the speaker in “Jesus Lives,” take this object for granted? When have you “bump[ed] into it, alarmed”?

You get a tap on the shoulder. It’s your mother and your best friend, or your aunt and your second grade teacher. How do they react to the object? How do they interact with it? What do they say about the object?

Allow students to write about the object for about 7 minutes. Pick some people to share, or (better) go through the circle and let everyone read their piece, allowing a question or two from other students after each reading.

Since these are objects that the students care about and come in contact with often, there should be a built-in attention to detail and an excitement to write (and, hopefully, an excitement to talk about it).

Using Metaphor to Make Connections

Using Metaphor to Make Connections
by Becky Godlasky, Susan Ray, Robert Rorabeck and Ryan Holt

Activity Accompanies Helena Buonagurio's “Not So-Perfect Pancake” in OOW 2002-03

Time Required: 15-35 minutes, depending upon whether or not students do a free write

Goals/Purpose: To allow students to consider the power of metaphors to develop meaning. To analyze the possibility for an object or place of significance to have multiple meanings and associations in one’s life experience. For example, Helena compares her mother’s not so perfect pancakes to overall life experience but also to her mother’s love: “It was just like life, sometimes things would go as planned without any wrinkles, smooth, and other times I would need a steamy iron to get rid of the bunching of wrinkles.”

Origin: Pedagogy workshop—Inkwell, Presence of Others

Procedure:

1. Have students read the narrative and underline each instance in which pancakes are used as a metaphor. Students should evaluate what metaphoric purpose the pancakes are used for in each instance. What kind of life connections does Helena make with her mother’s pancakes?
2. Students should then evaluate the title’s meaning to the metaphoric purpose of the pancakes within the narrative.
3. How does the use of the pancake metaphor connect the different elements of the paper? How are pancakes used in the framing of the story?
4. Class discussion—students should share their interpretations with the class
5. (Optional) have students brainstorm on objects of significance in their lives and then free-write using a specific object to create metaphors of multiple meaning

Additional comments/observations:

* Emphasize class involvement
* Exercise can be administered with or without free-write

What's So Funny?

1. Title for the Activity:
What’s So Funny?

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea:
Catherine Altmaier, Hanh Hoang, Pete Kunze, William Silverman, Holly Wilson (After reading OOW, we have decided this idea is similar to one created by John Bickley, entitled “Good Humor.” However, there are modifications to procedure.)

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): Anonymous

Title (of the essay or section): “Knocked Up”
Edition: 2007-2008
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing06/?q=node/550

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:

This is a style exercise. Students will learn how to use humor and to what effect. Ideally, students will be able to apply what they have learned in their future writing.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 45 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:

1) Have students read each essay and highlight where they laughed.
2) Ask students what made them laugh. It may be helpful to brief explain the following humor techniques: hyperbole, understatement, irony, oxymoron, pun, comic reduction (talking lightheartedly about something serious), the humorous triple/rule of three (I live by simple virtues: love, respect, NASCAR)
3) Ask them when each may be appropriate. Are there certain times when humor is inappropriate? How can one use comic relief in a narrative with a solemn tone?
4) Discussion starters: Which passages does everyone agree were funny?
Which areas are funny only to a few?
Why?
What types of humor are most appealing?
5) Are there any sections the class did not find funny? Any areas where it became sluggish or boring? Using humor, try to boost the appeal of that section.
6) Ask them to re-evaluate a paragraph of their own writing. Where could humor be used?

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:

This activity was inspired by the variety of humorous techniques the writer employed to discuss something very stressful: pregnancy. Sometimes we thought it worked well; other times, it was questionable. We hope students can discern for themselves how and when humor should be used.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

We’d recommend this activity in a lecture on style in writing. Humor is a great way to keep the reader entertained and gain their attention. We hope by taking the not so serious, serious, writers will learn better ways to appeal to their respective audiences.

This activity can easily be augmented for 1101 for Lorrie Moore’s “How to Be a Writer” or, in 1102, David Sedaris’ “Ashes.”

Writing Dramatic Personal Narratives

1. Title for the Activity: Writing Dramatic Personal Narratives

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea: Aaron Moore

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to

Author (if from Our Own Words): Chill Will Hill

Title (of the essay or section): Reflections

Edition: 2007-2008 Our Own Words
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing06/?q=node/551

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity: The goal of this exercise is to teach students how to write good dramatic narrative prose, mainly focusing on dialogue, action, and imagery.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 50 mins

6. Procedure to Follow:

1—Read the entire “Reflections” essay aloud to the class. Be sure to read the essay with exuberance, particularly shouting out the opening paragraph. No introduction necessary. Just walk in and read. After reading, pass out copies of William Hill’s essay.

2—Proceed into a discussion of what constitutes drama in general, perhaps starting with various dictionary definitions, then focus into drama in creative writing, then into narrative drama specifically. Be sure to explain the importance of narrative action, dialogue, and imagery in order to give life and vibrancy to a story. Reference the parts of William’s essay you feel display the most energy. Few students ever know how to show rather than tell.

3—If necessary, teach the proper format for dialogue in prose writing before proceeding into the free write exercise. Also, offer a quick explanation of second level action in between dialogue. Ask students to write a short, dramatic scene in class. Force students to include dialogue, second level action, and as focused and specific imagery as humanly possible.
4—If there’s still time left, have some students read their scene aloud in class; otherwise, just have them share the next class. You may want to require them to read dramatically to encourage a livelier, less restrained classroom atmosphere.

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:
I was inspired by the fact that my ENC1101 students have no clue how to give a short story or personal narrative life. I came to the conclusion that most of them may have never thought about putting dialogue into their work, and some of them don’t even know how. Furthermore, most don’t know how to create specific, detailed imagery, or perhaps it just never occurs to them.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

I have not tested this activity, so I’m concerned about the time. If the discussion takes longer than expected, break this activity up into two class periods. You could allow students to finish their scenes as homework and come in and read their work for the following class.

Writing Good Sentences

1. Title for the Activity:

Writing Good Sentences

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea:

Lissette Gonzalez

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to:

Chapter 17: “How Do You Write Stylish Sentences”

Scott Foresman Handbook, Eighth Edition
(but may be used in conjunction with another handbook)

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:

The goal of the activity is to find and revise clunky, unclear, imprecise, vague, abstract, convoluted sentences that may be obscuring meaning, thus getting in the way of the author's argument, rather than furthering it along. Also familiarizes student with powerful revision concepts that they can apply in their writing throughout the semester.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity:

Varies--anywhere from 20 minutes to two full 50-minute class periods.

6. Procedure to Follow:

1. In preparation for this activity, have students read Chapter 17 of the Scott Foresman Handbook, Eighth Edition, titled "How to Write Stylish Sentences." If using a different handbook, locate and have students review the equivalent of this material in that manual. It may be helpful to assign some of the chapter's accompanying practice exercises along with the reading, in preparation for the in-class activity.

2. The activity is easily tailored to the needs of your class. The scope of and time required can vary. It can be kept relatively short by concentrating on just one or two sentence-level problems that keep cropping up in your students' writing (i.e., hackneyed or vague language; too much "creative" nominalization (e.g., "The utilization of documentation will lead to a maximization of accountability and a prioritization of values); sprawling phrases, etc.).

If you have limited time, have students tackle only one or two select concepts from the list below. Using this approach, students rewrite several sentences for each of a couple of types of problem you would like them to focus on. This provides intensive practice in solving a few particular problems at the sentence level while keeping time requirements to a minimum.

For example, you may choose to have students concentrate only on constructing clear agent/action sentences or on condensing too-long noun phrases. In this case, the activity may be completed in about twenty minutes.

On the other hand, you may choose to devote an entire class period or two to having students find and rewrite one sentence each of all of the concepts listed below. This approach provides an overview of many typical sentence-level problems found in student writing.

Since there are a number of these concepts, the more of these that you choose to have your students concentrate on, the more time you will need for this activity.

It may be helpful to introduce all (or as many as you need) of the concepts in one longer session of this activity early in the semester. Later in the semester, students can repeat an abridged version, reviewing only one or two concepts intensively, as needed.

3. Have students bring in a relatively polished draft of a paper, one that's ready to be edited at the sentence level.

Students can work on their own drafts or exchange drafts with peers. You can also have students continue to pass drafts around every time you call “time” on a concept, once the class is ready to move on to the next concept for revision. This would give each student the opportunity to help revise a number of their peers’ drafts. It might be simpler, however, to let each student work on just one draft throughout the activity. The more familiar the student is with the draft, the easier it will be to pick out problem sentences.

Explain which concepts you’d like students to work on. Copy and paste from the concepts as they appear below and tailor your own list to hand out to students for quick reference during the activity. If in a CWC classroom, students can open a digital file and refer to it on their monitors. Having the concepts to refer to provides a quick guideline that corresponds to and reminds students of the reading they’ve done to prepare for this activity.

Ask students to proceed “one concept at a time.” You can call “time” when you’d like students to move on to the next concept.

Students should read through the draft, circling or highlighting sentences that need revision and labeling each with a number (1,2,3,4...) in the margins. They can then rewrite the sentences on a separate sheet or on the verso of the printed draft page, labeling each revised sentence with the corresponding number, so the revision is later easily inserted where it belongs in the body of the paper.

4. Ask students to apply these revision concepts in their next draft and see if the quality of sentences has improved by the next workshop.

This activity should give students intensive, focused practice in writing "good" sentences, as well as enhance their awareness of what a good sentence looks like. It also familiarizes students with “keywords” or “key phrases” for important concepts that they can apply in their writing throughout the semester. The instructor can use this activity early in the semester as a way of introducing approaches to building good sentences. As the semester progresses, the instructor can continue to emphasize the concepts, requiring students to work on sentence-level problems as they come up.

=========================
Concepts for Sentence Revision
=========================

1. Agent/Action Patterns
Revise sentences using a clear agent and a strong action.
What is happening?
Who is doing it?

2. Overloaded Subjects
Find concise keyword subjects in long noun phrases. Avoid overcrowded openings to sentences. Remember that sentences may need to be entirely rephrased to accommodate a more concise phrasing. Instead of, “The continued maximization and prioritization of user ethical accountability will mean better results,” write, “Higher user accountability will lead to better results.”

3. Precise Action
Choose precise action verbs to convey meaning. Avoid long verb phrases. Ex: Many students agreed with the new measures. NOT Several students were in agreement with the new measures.

4. Faulty Predicates
Don’t lose track of what your subjects do. For instance, don’t write “The media, with its biased news coverage, means that viewers may be biased, too.” In this case, what does it mean that “the media means that viewers may be biased”? The logical connection between the subject (media) and predicate (viewers) has been lost. A better sentence is “The media’s news coverage often panders to viewer bias.”

5. Passive verbs
Avoid passive constructions. Identify passive forms in your sentences, then locate the word that actually performs the action and make that the subject of your revised sentence.

6. Precise Language
Avoid using vague, abstract language that skirts around your meaning. Instead of “personal legal services provider,” use “lawyer.” Instead of “my means of transportation,” use “my ‘94 Honda Civic.” Instead of “the recently hired healthcare providers began their employment not long ago,” write, “the new nurses and doctors started work last week.” It is difficult to read vaguely worded sentences. Be as precise as possible when choosing each of your words.

7. Positive Statements
Choose positive over negative phrasing. Instead of “It is not unlikely that the president will vote on this today,” write “The president will likely vote on this today.”

8. Chunk Your Writing
Sentences and paragraphs that are too long make it difficult to follow your train of thought. Break long sentences into smaller sentences. Aim for no fewer than two or three paragraphs per page.

9. Sprawling Phrases
Avoid using cliched, wordy phrases. They tend to litter your writing with unnecessary verbiage that obscures your points. Instead of using several words to phrase meaning, reduce to as few words as possible. Instead of “on a daily basis,” use “daily” or “routinely.” Instead of “at this point in time,” use “today,” etc.

10. Nominalizations
Avoid tacking on endings to verbs and adjectives in order to turn them into nouns. Instead of “The man procured documentation explaining the utilization of internet connectivity technologies” write “The man found documents that explained how to connect to the internet.”

11. De-clutter Verb phrases
Instead of “gave an indication” write “indicated.” Instead of “are of the opinion that” write “believe.” Instead of “managed to come up with” write “came up with.” Instead of “proceeding to tell” write “told.”

12. Redundant words
Cut out words and phrases that repeat the same ideas. Ex: “strange oddity,” “gorgeous beauty,” “four separate, different categories,” “spoiled by destructive overdevelopment.”

13. Repetitive Language
Avoid repeating important words and concepts in the same sentence. Ex: “I thought that it was important to point out the most important concepts.” AND “To understand these concepts, it is important to understand where the concepts come from.”

14. Intensifiers
Too many intensifiers make your writing read hyperbolic. Why say “We’re completely done with the project” when you can say “We’re done with the project”?

15. Overloaded prepositional phrases
Get to the point. Don’t write, “Behind the pink house on the street that winds through from one end to the other of the town where I was born, you’ll find a rose bush.” Write, “There is a rose bush behind the pink beach house on the winding street, in the town where I was born.”

16. Relative pronouns
Cut “that, which, who, whom” if you can do without them.

17. Vary sentence types and lengths
Use both simple and complex sentences. Write both long and short sentences in a paragraph. Note that “simple vs. complex” and “short vs. long” are separate concepts.

18. Similes and Metaphors
Use these to make vivid comparisons that bring life to your writing. Instead of “The jury had to decide whether the man was guilty or innocent,” write “With the accused’s fate in the balance, the jury weighed evidence that might prove his guilt or innocence.” Use these sparingly and deliberately, however. And be careful not to mix your metaphors.

19. “Fancypants” Language
Avoid using words that make your writing stiff and too formal. Don’t write, “The conflagration of convoluted details was exacerbated by a surplus of formalistic errors. Write, “Besides showing a number of errors of form, the paper was marred by too much attention to bizarre details.”

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:

The activity was first conceived as a way of focusing student attention on sentence-level problems. Many students who are quite capable of structuring a logical argument in a paper may not know how to edit their own language and sentences. Or students may get carried away and use language that is too formal, convoluted, or ornamented. Another problem is the use of too-vague or too-abstract language, which can make student writing sound like it is not saying anything specific at all.

The activity is based on concepts covered in Chapter 17 of the SFH, Eighth Edition, though it can be applied using another handbook.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

These concepts are abstract and some students may have trouble grasping them without practice. It is recommended that you tackle your class’s most pressing sentence-level-writing problems, selecting a handful of concepts to focus on. The more practice a student gains in using these concepts, the more successful the activity is likely to be.

Writing with Excitement

Writing With Excitement
by
Tao Valentine and Katrina Smith

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to
Author (if from Our Own Words): Unlisted

Title (of the essay or section): “Wrongfully Accused”

Edition: 2006-2007
URL(s) or page(s), or both if available: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/book/view/448
4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity: Help students with using descriptive words and phrases to make an essay more engaging to the reader.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 50 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:
1. Hand out copies of the essay to each student.
2. Give 5-10 minutes for individual reading.
3. Break students into groups of 3-4.
4. Ask each student to pick out 5 sentences or phrases which appear dull or in need of expansion.
5. As a group students re-write chosen sections.
6. Put essay on overhead projector.
7. Have each group insert their modifications as we workshop the essay together.
8. Explain purpose of activity and what you wanted students to get from the exercise.
9. Point out how rephrasing can benefit their writing.

“Pot Was Not My Motivation, Mom” Show-Don’t-Tell Paragraph Activity

1. Title for the Activity: “Pot Was Not My Motivation, Mom” Show-Don’t-Tell Paragraph Activity

2. Name(s) of the Authors of the Idea: David Rodriguez

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to

Author: Susannah Hall

Title: “Pot Was Not My Motivation, Mom”

Edition: 2008-2009

URL: http://english3.fsu.edu/writing/?q=node/684

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity: Teaching paragraph construction

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 20-30 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:

First read the essay out loud. Then return to the paragraph starting with “The week before my project topic was due.”

In that paragraph, Hall creates a pastiche of memories that all link her not only to her mom, but also to a specific, recurrent activity. In that way, the memories give importance to her decision to try to attempt this same activity with her mom as an adult. Yet the paragraph doesn’t follow the topic sentenceàsupporting evidence formula and never comes out and says, “This was important to me.” Instead, the paragraph uses an internal logic that organizes the details.

For the activity, have the students pick something from their lives that they’ve been doing since they were children—playing baseball, going to Disneyworld, mowing the lawn. Whatever it is, have them then write a paragraph where in each sentence they are at a different age and doing the same activity. When they are done, share around the room.

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:

“Pot Was Not My Motivation, Mom” essay

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:

Most students will probably write about their memories playing sports. This is fine as long as they see that a simple chronology shows the importance in their lives as effectively as saying, “I’ve been interested in sports my whole life. When I was five, yada yada yada. Then when I was seven, yada yada yada.” It’s another way of constructing a successful paragraph that makes its points through—our favorite saying—showing, not telling.

Exercises for Thinking and Reading Critically

Advertising Influence

ADVERTISING INFLUENCE

Deborah Hall

Time Required: 30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: Exploring culture and what images (and/or words) motivate people. The purpose is to make students aware of the influences by which they are surrounded, to become alert to that influence and to analyze it through freewriting of their observations. They also must form words for visual stimulation--something that they usually take for granted.
Description: Advertising Influence. This exercise calls for the students to evaluate and freewrite on a particular advertisement from a magazine.
Origin: Cindy Milne

Procedure:

1. Pass out ads and allow students to choose one.
2. Allow them to study the ad while you explain the purpose of this exercise. Remind students that real people are imagining these ads with a target audience in mind.
3. Ask them questions about the ads, for example: "What is the ad selling?", "Who is the audience?", "What visual stimulation does the ad use?", "What might happen to you if you... by the dress, drink the Bacardi. etc.?" "Do you become cool?"
4. Begin freewriting on all the descriptive elements that you pick up from the ad. Feel free to diverge into some other area that the ad stimulates.
5. Allow five to ten minutes for writing.

Discussion: What kind of discoveries did you make? How does that make you feel about these companies? The ads must be successful or the companies wouldn’t spend great deals of money to run them in popular media. Is this invasive? What about persuasive writing? How much are we responsible for our own critical thinking and can we blame companies for capitalizing off our absence of critique?

Lunch

LUNCH
Seth Kahn-Egan

Time Required: 15-20 minutes, longer if you want
Goals/Purpose: Critical thinking exercise--I use this exercise for two different purposes, depending on the class: (1) Talk about stereotyping and overgeneralization., or, more positively, reaching conclusions from a given set of ideas. (2) Talk about reading nonverbal signals.
Description: Lunch. The exercise provides students with two lunch menus. The students are then asked a series of questions, which they answer according to the kind of foods on the menus. I have conducted this exercise as both a writing exercise and a class discussion.
Origin: Brummet, Barry. Rhetoric in Popular Culture. New York: St. Martin’s Press, 1994. 29-30

Procedure:

1. Before beginning the exercise, write these two lists on the board, or provide a handout:

Lunch #1
Double Martini
Twelve-ounce T-bone steak
French Fries
Corn on the cob
Apple Pie a la mode
Stoneware plate
Bone-handled flatware
Paper napkins

Lunch #2
Hot Herbal Tea
Pita Sandwish with avacado and sprouts
Raw vegetables with yogurt dip
Simple china plate
Stainless steel flatware
Cloth Napkin

2. Give students a couple of minutes to read the menus and think about the kind of person who might choose either one.

3. Ask the students to either write or discuss answers to the following questions:

a) Which one of these diners in more concerned about the environment?
b) Which one of these diners is a fan of professional football?
c) Which of these diners is male or female?
d) Which of these diners is a Republican and which is a Democrat?
e) Which of these diners is over 55, and which is under 40?

In their writing or discussions, emphasize that students should be prepared to justify, or at least explain their responses. Also, let them know in advance they can respond with "Not enough information" (just like the SAT), but explain that they will have to defend that answer.

4. If you have had the students write their own answers to the questions, follow up the writing by having them share their answers in class.

My experiences with this exercise have been overwhelmingly positive. Students will almost always generate competing answers to the questions, which teaches them, depending on how you spin it, that stereotypes aren’t always right or wrong; that they need to be able to explain where their statements come from based on some kind of evidence; that you can learn a lot about someone by paying attention to what they eat; and any number of other conclusions you might want them to see. On top of all that, it’s really fun to hear their answers, and to see them realize that other people read "texts" differently, but no more or less validly, than they do.

The Devil's Advocate

THE DEVIL'S ADVOCATE

Paul Reifenheiser

Time Required: At least 20 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise is an attempt to get students to see that what they think they have written is not always what they actually have on the page. It is also an attempt to have students forge their own opinions, in particular about a reading assignment, and be able to back up those opinions as well. Therefore students will need to have made a close reading of a text in order to be able to validate their idea and beliefs.

Procedure:

1. Ask students to write a response or a short paper to a piece of fiction--preferably one that is wide open to interpretation (this exercise could work if all students were asked to read the same piece of fiction and then be able to discuss it, but I like it better with a response). Or have students use papers assigned in 1101, if applicable, like an argumentative paper, paper about culture, or anything that is filled with opinions that need to be backed up.
2. Ask students to get into pairs. Then ask your students to write the following: 1) In one sentence, their main position or thesis. 2) A list of their opinions included within the paper ( you may want to say at least 3 or at least 5, etc.) 3)Any possible counter-arguments to their opinions.
3. Then ask students to put that first sheet (with the three sections just listed) away and switch and read their partner’s paper. Then ask the students to write down, for their partner’s paper, the same thing they write down for their own: 1)The thesis 2)the opinions 3) counter-opinions.
4. Ask students to bring out the original sheets from Part 2 and then compare the differences between what they thought was in their paper and what an outside reader thought was inherent in their text.

Wrap-Up: Hopefully, some students will realize that their opinions were not well supported or that they did not express that which they thought as well as possible. Ask the class for some examples/highlights from partner discussion. This exercise also will reveal the different ways in which people read texts and think about them.

Exericses for The Scott Foresman Handbook for Writers

Avoiding Stand-Alone Quotations

Avoiding Stand-Alone Quotations

Joni Mayfield, Mary Larkin, Kelly Herring

Activity Accompanies Scott Foresman Handbook Chapter 50 “How Do you Handle Quotations?”

Time Required: 30-45 minutes

Goals/Purpose: to have students learn the importance of accuracy when quoting, to quote appropriately and creatively, and to use proper formatting. Proper quotations are demonstrated in SFH chapter 50 and students are asked to create and use various types of quotes. Students will learn to recognize the different types of quotes and be able to select the proper quote for their work.

Procedure:
A. Distribute 3 scenarios (teacher’s choice, see # 8 below) to each group. Round 1: instruct students to work together (on scenario 1 only) tailoring each quote to the situation stated in the passage. Encourage students to use the suggestions from SFH to craft quoted material to fit the grammar of their sentences. Students should only choose the most persuasive sections to use in their argument while leaving out less helpful things.
B. Allow groups 10 minutes before asking each group to share their statement with the class. Sharing the prepared statements allows the entire class to benefit from the thinking of each group.
C. For Round 2, inform students that they will be competing against their classmates to create the best tailored, most creative/persuasive use of the quote for this scenario. They must also cite the text correctly (MLA format, or the format of your choice).
D. After working 10 minutes, ask for a volunteer from each group to publish his/her group’s statement on the board or on a Word document through the computer projection system. Read each statement aloud, then ask students to vote (honestly, not selfishly) for the best. One way to keep it honest is to require students to give a genuine reason for their vote.
E. Round 3. Depending on how students have responded to this activity, place one of the following conditions on the 3rd scenario.
Statements must
· Have 3 or more sentences dealing with the quote (i.e. 1 sentence before, 1 w/quote, and 1 after).
· Have the longest/shortest sentence using a quote effectively and persuasively.
· Include at least 2 verbs of attrition (see SFH)
· Use ellipses and square brackets correctly.
· Incorporate 2 different frames, using 2 different parts of the quote in successive sentences.
(Note: You may also assign any of these conditions to the additional practice worksheet.)
7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.: The motivation for these exercises arose due to a problematic aspect the members of our group encountered while teaching the researched essay: quoting. We found that, often, our students let quotes dominate certain paragraphs of their essays (if not the entire essay itself). Additionally, students seemed unaware that quotes needed to be introduced or framed within their own commentary. The problem of stand-alone quotes also led to insertion of unnecessary or irrelevant information. Of course, students frequently used the extra information to “pad” their papers. As a result, the essays lost both focus and the voices of their authors.
8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice: Several resources are included with this activity: 3 scenarios to be used during class time, 3 scenarios to be used in conjunction with Convergences, 3 scenarios to be used as additional practice outside of class.
If you are using Convergences, you may want to use the scenarios associated with the book for class time. If not, the “Class Time Scenarios” (not related to Convergences) are great for any research-oriented class.

Also, the Mai Lai Court Martial trial in the “Convergences Scenarios” may be used as an activity on its own. You may want to hold a mock trial during class with lawyers (prosecution and defense teams), a judge, and a jury to decide the case. The students really get into this.

9. Resources:
Convergences Scenarios

Scenario # 1: Modifying Quotations

Text: Judith Ortiz Cofer’s Silent Dancing pp. 25-35 in Convergences

Students will first use direct quotes. Next, the students will modify the quotes, tailoring them to fit their sentences’ grammar.

Students will create two versions of each quote by varying the frame or the quote itself.

Scenario # 2: The Power of Quotes—Communicating/Miscommunicating

Text: Bill Clinton’s Public Apology 131-134 from Convergences

Write a brief paragraph making a claim or giving your opinion on something from Clinton’s speech. Select sections of Clinton’s speech and use direct quotes to support your statement.

Now, deliberately misquote something from Clinton’s speech, and shape a paragraph to create misinformation.

Discuss in small groups your observations and reactions to misinformation. Think about and discuss the importance of quoting properly.

Scenario #3 Quotation (after reading “Children with a Secret”)

After reading “Children with a Secret” on pp. 146-157 of our Convergences
text, write a paragraph answering one of the following questions. Support
your answer using the corresponding quotation taken from Faller’s essay.
Note: Kathleen Coulborn Faller is “a leading expert in the field of
child abuse” (Atwan 146).

1. Why do you think dolls might be helpful to a therapist counseling a
sexually abused child?

Corresponding quotation: “Anna both loved and feared her offender. These
complex emotions made it impossible for her to reveal her secret in
response to invitational questions. Instead, over time she was able to
reveal her sexual knowledge and experiences using dolls” (Atwan 151).

2. What additional difficulties might male victims encounter when
attempting to discuss their abuse?

Corresponding quotation: “Most offenders are males and thus most boy
victims must overcome twin taboos to tell, sex with an adult and a
same-sexed encounter. Moreover, male socialization, which implies that
being unable to protect oneself from injury and needing to talk about
worries are ‘unmanly,’ adds to boys’ difficulty in telling the secret”
(Atwan 153).

Scenario # 4:

Consider yourself a defense lawyer or a prosecution lawyer (instructor may assign defense and prosecution). Use the evidence provided in Convergences (161-167) the Court Martial Transcript, the journal entries, and the photographs to prepare a statement for your side. Be convincing and use quotations to support your argument.

Defense Team may use this quote from the “Court Martial Transcript.”
“Q: Everytime that the company would go, at least a company-sized unit, to try to get in that area and stay there, they encountered hostile fire, enemy fire, suffered casualties, and were driven out?
“A: Yes, sir” (Atwan 162).

Prosecution Team may use this quote from Tomas R. Partsch’s war journal, “March 16-18, 1968.”
“We started to move slowly through the village shooting everything in sight children men and women and animals. … I didn’t fire a round yet and didn’t kill anybody not even a chicken I couldn’t. …after a while they said not to kill women and children. … I didn’t think it was right but we did it but we did it at least I can say I didn’t kill anybody” (Atwan 164).

Classroom Scenarios
Scenario # 1: Exercise: Making Music

Whose lyrics are better? Which is the better singer/artist? Christina
Aguilera or Briney Spears? You decide! But you must quote a verse from
each singer/writer to support your views. If you can sing the song,
we'll be impressed!

Here are a few songs by each artist:

Artist Britney spears
Album Britney
Song Boys

I spotted u dancing
u made all the girls stare
ur lips and ur brown eyes
and ur sexy hair
I should SHAKE my thing
Make the world want u
tell ur boys ull be back
i wanna see what u can do
what would it take for u to just leave with me
Not try to sound concieded but me and u were meant to be
Ur a sexy guy
im a nice girl
lets turn this dance floor into our own lil nasty world
Boys
sometimes a girl just needs one
Boys
to love her and to hold
Boys
and when a girl is with one
Boys
then shes in control
Take the boy of the dance floor
whisper in his ear
must of said something bout me
cause hes lookin over here
Ur lookin at me
wit that sexy attitude
but the way ur boys movin it
it puts me in the mood
what would it take for u to just leave with me
Not try to sound concieded but me and u were meant to be
Ur a sexy guy
im a nice girl
lets turn this dance floor into our own lil nasty world
Boys
sometimes a girl just needs one
Boys
to love her and to hold
Boys
and when a girl is with one
Boys
then shes in control
Tonight lets ride boy have no fear
theres no time to loose
and next week u may not see me here
so boy just make ur move
Boys
sometimes a girl just needs one
Boys
to love her and to hold
Boys
and when a girl is with one
Boys
Come with me
lets fly into the night
Boy tonight is ours
Keep lovin me make sure u hold me tight lets head for the stars
GET NASTY!
Boys
sometimes a girl just needs one
Boys
to love her and to hold
Boys
and when a girl is with one
Boys
Cant live with um
cant live without um

**************************
Artist Britney Spears
Song Autumm Goodbye

I never promised you a happy ending
you never said you wouldn't make me cry
but summer love will keep us warm long after our
Autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye

Thinking of you and the love of our lives
in the sweet summer time
So sad but true(so sad,so sad)
we must lieve it behind, in our hearts in our minds

from April through September
bitter sweet was the love that we shared
don't forget I remember...

I never promised you a happy ending
(you never said)you never said you wouldn't make me cry
(but summer love)but summer love will keep us warm long after
our Autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye...

I never promised you a happy ending
(you never said)you never said you wouldn't make me cry
(but summer love) but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye.autumm goodbye...

memories can fade(they can fade)
but my heart has a place
for that smile on your face(on your face)
and maybe someday(someday)
we can be more then friends love will find us again

red days and blue tomorrows
time will give back the love that we shared
and the time that we barrowed

I never promised you a happy ending
(you never said)you never said you wouldn't make me cry
(but summer love)but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye

I never promised you a happy ending
(you never said)you never said you woldn't make me cry
(but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye..

we'll leave behind
the summer time
our hearts,our minds
they will remind
we won't forget
the day we met
the day we cried
Autumm goodbye

I never promisewd you a happy ending
(you never said)you never said you wouldn't make me cry
(but summer love)but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye...

I never promised you a happy ending
(yuo never said)you never said you wouldn't make me cry
(but summer love)but summer love will keep us warm long after
our autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye,autumm goodbye------

***************************************
Artist Britney Spears
Song Born To Make You Happy

Im sitting here alone up in my room
And thinking about the times that we've been through (oh my love)
Im looking at a picture in my hand
Trying my best to understand
I really wanna know what we did wrong
With the love that felt so strong
If only you were here tonight
I know that we could make it right
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
Cuz your the only one within my heart
I was born to make you happy
Always and forever you and me
Thats the way our life should be
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
I know I've been a fool since you've been gone
I'd rather give it up then carry on (oh my love)
Cuz livin in a dream of you and me
Is not the way my life should be
I dont wanna cry a tear for you
So forgive me if I do
If only you were here tonight
I know that we could make it right
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
Cuz your the only one within my heart
I was born to make you happy
Always and forever you and me
Thats the way our life should be
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
I'd do anything
I'd give you my world
I'd wait forever to be your girl
Just call out my name (just call out my name)
I will be there (and I will be there)
Just to show you how much I care
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
Cuz your the only one within my heart
I was born to make you happy
Always and forever you and me
Thats the way our life should be
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy
I was born to make you happy
Always and forever you and me
Thats the way our life should be
I dont know how to live without your love
I was born to make you happy

***************************************
Artist CHRISTINA AGUILERA
Album Stripped
Song Beautiful

Don't look at me

Every day is so wonderful
And suddenly, it's hard to breathe
Now and then, I get insecure
From all the fame, I'm so ashamed

I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down
So don't you bring me down today

To all your friends, you're delirious
So consumed in all your doom
Trying hard to fill the emptiness
The piece is gone and the puzzle undone
That's the way it is

You are beautiful no matter what they say
Words won't bring you down
You are beautiful in every single way
Yes, words won't bring you down
Don't you bring me down today...

No matter what we do
(no matter what we do)
No matter what they say
(no matter what they say)
When the sun is shining through
Then the clouds won't stay

And everywhere we go
(everywhere we go)
The sun won't always shine
(sun won't always shine)
But tomorrow will find a way
All the other times

We are beautiful no matter what they say
Yes, words won't bring us down
We are beautiful no matter what they say
Yes, words can't bring us down
Don't you bring me down today

Don't you bring me down today
Don't you bring me down today

***************************************
Artist Christina Aguilera
Album Christina Aguilera
Song I turn to you

When I'm lost in the rain,
In your eyes I know I'll find the light to light my way.
And when I'm scared and losing ground;
When my world is going crazy, you can turn it all around.

And when I'm down you're there; pushing me to the top.
You're always there; giving me all you've got.

For a shield from the storm;
For a friend; for a love
To keep me safe and warm,
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong;
For the will to carry on;
For everything you do;
For everything that's true,
I turn to you.

When I lose my will to win,
I just reach for you and I can reach the sky again.
I can do anything,
'Cause your love is so amazing; 'cause your love inspires me.

And when I need a friend, you're always on my side;
Giving me faith that gets me through the night.

For a shield from the storm;
For a friend; for a love
To keep me safe and warm,
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong;
For the will to carry on;
For everything you do;
For everything that's true,
I turn to you.

For the arms to be my shelter through all the rain;
For truth that will never change;
For someone to lean on;
for a heart I can rely on through anything;
For that one who I can run to....
I turn to you.

For a shield from the storm;
For a friend; for a love
To keep me safe and warm,
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong;
For the will to carry on;
For everything you do;
For everything that's true,
I turn to you.

For a shield from the storm;
For a friend; for a love
To keep me safe and warm,
I turn to you.
For the strength to be strong;
For the will to carry on;
For everything you do;
For everything that's true...

For everything you do;
For everything that's true,
I turn to you...
***************************************

Artist Christina Aguilera
Album Unknown
Song DREAMY EYES

I'm reaching out to touch you
In the middle of the the night
And I don't know if I've been sleeping
But I hold my pillow tight
Are you real,
Or are you my imagination playing games?
I can set you free you'll always be
My one eternal flame.

Your dreamy eyes,
They just wont say goodbye
Well, it must be my fate
'Cause I just can't escape
And the passion never dies
Oh, dreamy eyes
No matter how I cry
I just can't reach you
Dreamy eyes

You're a vision of tomorrow
And a ghost from yesterday
And I'll be trying not to let you
Take my breath away
You're a summer breeze
That comes and goes
But somehow lingers on
Tell me how can I forget you,
If you're never really gone?

Your dreamy eyes,
They just wont say goodbye
Well, it must be my fate
'Cause I just can't escape
And the passion never dies
Oh, dreamy eyes
No matter how I cry
I just can't reach you
Dreamy eyes

What do I have to do
To get that close to you?
And your
Your dreamy eyes,
They just wont say goodbye
Well, it must be my fate
'Cause I just can't escape
And the passion never dies
Oh, I try so hard to release you
But no matter how I cry
I just keep seeing through
Dreamy Eyes

***************************************
Artist CHRISTINA AGUILERA
Album Stripped
Song Can't Hold Us Down

So what am I not supposed to have an opinion
Should I be quiet just because I'm a woman
Call me a bitch cos I speak what's on my mind
Guess it's easier for you to swallow if I sat and smiled

When a female fires back
Suddenly the target don't know how to act
So he does what any little boy will do
Making up a few false rumors or two

That for sure is not a man to me
Slanderin' names for popularity
It's sad you only get your fame through controversy
But now it's time for me to come and give you more to say

This is for my girls all around the world
Who've come across a man who don't respect your worth
Thinking all women should be seen, not heard
So what do we do girls?
Shout louder!
Letting them know we're gonna stand our ground
Lift your hands high and wave them proud
Take a deep breath and say it loud
Never can, never will, can't hold us down

Nobody can hold us down
Nobody can hold us down
Nobody can hold us down
Never can, never will

So what am I not supposed to say what I'm saying
Are you offended by the message I'm bringing
Call me whatever cos your words don't mean a thing
Guess you ain't even a man enough to handle what I sing

If you look back in history
It's a common double standard of society
The guy gets all the glory the more he can score
While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore

I don't understand why it's okay
The guy can get away with it & the girl gets named
All my ladies come together and make a change
Start a new beginning for us everybody sing

This is for my girls all around the world
Who've come across a man who don't respect your worth
Thinking all women should be seen, not heard
What do we do girls?
Shout louder!
Letting them know we're gonna stand our ground
Lift your hands high and wave 'em proud
Take a deep breath and say it loud
Never can, never will, can't hold us down

[Lil' Kim:]
Check it - Here's something I just can't understand
If the guy have three girls then he's the man
He can either give us some head, sex her off
If the girl do the same, then she's a whore
But the table's about to turn
I'll bet my fame on it
Cats take my ideas and put their name on it
It's aiight though, you can't hold me down
I got to keep on movin'
To all my girls with a man who be tryin to mack
Do it right back to him and let that be that
You need to let him know that his game is whack
And Lil' Kim and Christina Aguilera got your back

But you're just a little boy
Think you're so cute, so coy
You must talk so big
To make up for small lil' things
So you're just a little boy
All you'll do is annoy
You must talk so big
To make up for small lil' things

This is for my girls...
This is for my girls all around the world
Who've come across a man who don't respect your worth
Thinking all women should be seen, not heard
So what do we do girls?
Shout louder!
Letting them know we're gonna stand our ground
Lift your hands high and wave 'em proud
Take a deep breath and say it loud
Never can, never will, can't hold us down

This is for my girls all around the world
Who've come across a man who don't respect your worth
Thinking all women should be seen, not heard
So what do we do girls?
Shout louder!
Letting them know we're gonna stand our ground
Lift your hands high and wave 'em proud
Take a deep breath and say it loud
Never can, never will, can't hold us down
Spread the word, can't hold us down
***************************************

Scenario # 2

You have a friend who thinks that listening to music is a waste of time.
S/he is mechanically oriented, and further, believes that beautiful music
possesses the ability to make its listeners emotional. “Emotion,” your
friend argues, “is the opposite of logic. Indulging in such an emotional
pastime is therefore silly.” You decide to write your friend a letter in
which you will cite the following quotation by the eighteenth-century
German philosopher and mathematician Gottfried Leibniz, hoping it will
persuade her or him that music can be meaningful to all people, including
people famous for their skill at logic:

“Music is an unconscious arithmetical activity of the soul in which the
soul counts unaware that it is counting” (Bernstein and Picker 7).

Bernstein, Martin and Martin Picker. An Introduction to Music. Needham
Heights: Simon and Schuster, 1998.

Scenario # 3:

You are trying to convince your friend to go bungee jumping but she is afraid that it isn't safe enough. Compose an email using the following quote about the many safety precautions used in bungee jumping to persuade her.

“Statistically one bungee jump is about as dangerous as driving 100 miles in a car. (About a 2 in one million chance of death) There have been millions of safe bungee jumps, and only a few accidents. Almost every accident was caused by the jumper not being properly connected to the cord or the cord not being properly connected to the jump platform”( http://www.geocities.com/nilymehta/bungeebody.htm#).

X-treme Adventure Sports, Inc. Copyright 2000-2004. 2 April, 2004 http://www.geocities.com/nilymehta/bungeebody.htm#

Additional Scenarios (homework)

Scenario # 1:

You and another student (both English majors) are thinking about which foreign language to study in college. S/he argues that Spanish is the
best language to study; not only is it easy to learn, but it is also
practical since we live in a state where Spanish is spoken frequently.
You, however, think that Latin is a better language to study because the
classes are easier (they lack a laboratory component), and many English
words are related to Latin. You do a little research and e-mail your
fellow student using the following statements by Professor Frederic
Wheelock (an expert in the Latin language and an author whose text is
commonly used to teach Latin in college) to convince him or her to study
Latin with you:

“It is the cognate of many languages and the parent of many; it can even
be called the adoptive parent of our own” (Wheelock xxxii).

“[E]ven a limited knowledge of Latin is a great asset to anyone who works
with or is interested in English and the Romance languages and
literatures” (Wheelock xxxix).

Wheelock, Frederic M. Wheelock’s Latin: The Classic Introductory Latin
Course, Based on Ancient Authors. New York: HarperCollins, 2000.

Scenario # 2

You are working on an article for your local newspaper defending fashion models from the scorn of the public who claim they are all anorexic and unhealthy. You want to inform the public that their claim is a blanket statement and a stereotype and that not all supermodels stoop to unhealthy means to achieve their fabulous bodies. How would you use the following excerpt from People magazine?

Note: The authors are writing about Yoanna House, pictured in the background of this article.

“As it happens, House has her own Cinderella story. Three years ago she weighed 189 lbs., ‘normal’ for her height, says House, who’s 5’11”. But not for the fashion runway. After spending more than two years whittling off 60 lbs. with diet and exercise, she now has a contract with IMG Models. ‘It makes me really proud that there can be a healthy model out there to show you don’t have to resort to crazy means to get the type of figure you desire,’ says ANTM creator Tyra Banks” (Adkins 19).

Adkins, Greg, Marisa Wong, Jennifer Wren, etc. “Scoop: Ready to Wear.” People
5 Apr. 2004: 19.

Scenario # 3: Paraphrasing

Text: A Movie of Your Choice
Write an excerpt of dialogue from a scene that struck you as significant. You might choose from movies such as Chicago, Moulin Rouge, or Titanic. Do not use direct quotes from the movie, but paraphrase what you remember. Give us a brief setting for the setting of the dialogue first.

Clean Your Room!

Clean Your Room! A Lesson on bringing Your Writing to Life.
by
Stephanie Singletary

3. Essay(s) or section(s) the Activity Relates to:

Scott Foresman Handbook:
-pg 252: 17b-How emotionally charged should your language be? 1)Understand how denotation and connotation work.
-pg 344: 19e-How do you use figurative language? 1)Look for fresh images that will strike your reader. 2)Use similes and metaphors to dramatize ideas.
-Outside sources listed in number 7. Background for the Activity

4. Goal/Purpose of the Activity:

The purpose of this activity is to show students how they can use punctuation, details and effective word choices to bring their writing to life. After reading the selected pages from the SFH (and the additional outside text) and after doing the activity, students should have a better understanding of how language can be used to create different tones/attitudes/emotions in their writing. They should also be able to distinguish between general and specific language and understand how to use figurative language to bring personality to their writing.

5. Estimated Time Required for the Activity: 45 minutes

6. Procedure to Follow:
1) Assign the reading before the class that you plan on doing the activity.
2) Spend about 10 minutes in class discussing the reading. (as well as sources listed under number 7. Background for the Activity)
3) Students should get into groups of four
4) Pass out the writing prompt (below) to each group
5) Assign each group a tone/emotion to take and give them about 15 minutes to rewrite or revise the prompt (using the techniques discussed in the SFH) to create the desired tone/emotion for the speaker.
6) Have one student from each group read their revision aloud.
7) Finally, have students respond to how varied the groups’ responses were.

Prompt: When I got home from school yesterday my mom was waiting for me in my room. She said that I needed to clean it immediately or I wouldn’t get my allowance that week. I really needed the ten bucks so I could go out that weekend. I looked around the room and my mom was right. The place was very messy. There were dirty clothes and food wrappers everywhere. I couldn’t even see the carpet.

Different tones/emotions:
1. sad or embarrassed
2. indifferent or casual
3. confused or hurt
4. frustrated or annoyed
5. angry or combative
6. sarcastic or funny

7. Background for the Activity, i.e., the source(s) which inspired the idea, readings that relate, etc.:
I found an online activity/example that lists a variety of different, creative ways to describe getting a parking ticket. The name of the page is Elements of Fiction. Style, Tone and Language Exercise and is found at the following address: http://bcs.bedfordstmartins.com/Virtualit/fiction/elements.asp?e=5_ex
From the cite:
Let’s take, for example, the somewhat common experience of getting a parking ticket. Here are several ways the parking ticket experience might be expressed by the recipient.

· The policeman gave me a parking ticket.

· Some bored cop tagged me with another ticket.

· Someone had slipped the ticket under my windshield wiper like a blade slipped under a rib.

· A citation for violation of parking regulations had been affixed to my car.

· I got another &*%@# ticket!

· Another week goes by, another parking ticket stuck to the car—what else
is new?
I also use punctuation as an example:

Hello.
Hello!
Hello?
Hello.

I can’t remember where this is from.

8. Other Comments, e.g., observations on using the activity, concerns or qualifications for using it, extra advice:
I have used this activity in my class (without the SFH reading) and the students really understood and enjoyed it. It’s a very fun and educational activity! The students really get into acting out the new paragraph’s they have created.

Creating Transitions to Make Your Essay "Flow"

“Creating Transitions to Make Your Essay ‘Flow’” (4 Separate Revision Activities)

Dana Kantrowitz, Jacqueline Schulz, Jennifer Dawson

Activity Accompanies The Scott Foresman Handbook for Writers, Seventh Edition, Pages
233-234 & 256-262.

Time Required: 35-45 minutes

Goal/Purpose: Students work independently or in groups, focusing on strengthening the
connections between their ideas, creating a natural flow of information, and arranging paragraphs (and sentences within paragraphs) in an organized and logical way.

Preface: You have the choice of 4 different exercises. For three of the four activity choices, students need a completed 2nd or 3rd draft of any essay of their own to work with (might not be the best exercise for narrative essays). One of the following activity choices is designed to be used without their drafts.

Procedure: Each of the four exercises has its own set of instructions.
You’ll probably want to assign pgs. 233-234 and 256-262 of The Scott Foresman Handbook before you do any of these exercises in class. Or, you can hold a class discussion on transitions, paragraphing, and organization and use the handout provided below as a review. After the students complete any of these exercises, if there’s time, you might hold a class discussion on what they learned and how they can apply this in-class work to their drafts.

[The following review of transitions and paragraphing is written for your students and can be used as a handout.]

HANDOUT: Making Your Essay “Flow”

You know that TRANSITIONS connect ideas from paragraph to paragraph, but maybe you’ve been ignoring the transitions that connect your ideas from one sentence to the next within a single paragraph. Maybe you didn’t even realize that transitions are not just words like However, Next, or Thus. When transitions are really working, they don’t stick out like a single word at the beginning of each sentence. Rather, they are ingrained in the very ideas of your essay. They move you reader from one point to the next, from your intro to the conclusion.

SOME BASIC PARAGRAPHING RULES:

· Each paragraph should have a single point or focus.
That doesn’t mean that every sentence in that paragraph repeats the same point, but that each sentence helps the reader understand that point. A paragraph may have more than one point, as long as those points are related to the extent that they need to be in the same paragraph.

· Each typed page should have 2-4 paragraphs.
When a single paragraph runs longer than half a page, consider breaking it in places where the point changes, or maybe when you’re explaining another point of view, or when you’re going into a set of examples and each can appear in its own paragraph.

· Don’t be afraid to rearrange your paragraphs or sentences.
Use the cut and paste option during drafting to organize your essay around your main points. Think of the order in which you present your ideas to your reader. Make sure all relevant sentences are in the same paragraph. Your goal is to be clear, easy to follow, and LOGICAL. Then, re-write transitions so every idea is connected. Think of your ideas or main points as “dots”—You have to connect the dots for your reader.

TIPS FOR WRITING STRONGER TRANSITIONS:

· Use repetition—Repeat key words or phrases to create a pattern or rhythm in a single paragraph. Or, find new words and phrases to establish your point in a way that won’t bore your reader.

· Use parallel phrases—phrases that begin with the same word or that share the same grammatical structure—to emphasize connections between similar examples or related pieces of information.

· Try the “old-new contract”—Advance an argument or idea by linking each piece of new information to what’s appeared before it. When a writer neglects to link old and new information, a paragraph may read more like a random series of observations than a coherent discussion.

· Watch out for sentences that begin with phrases like it is, there are, and there is—Often these phrases are indicators of weak transitions because it’s hard to tell who or what the subject is.

· Use pronouns like this, that, these, those, and such to tie ideas together. Each of these words must clearly refer back to the subject of the previous sentence.

[The following instructions are written for your students and can be administered as a handout.]

EXERCISE #1: ORGANIZING AND CONNECTING MAIN IDEAS

You will need a completed 2nd or 3rd draft of your essay to do this.

1. Underline—Go through each paragraph in the entire essay and underline the main point of that paragraph. If the main point does not appear in a single sentence (or two), then write (in the margins next to that paragraph) a single sentence that clearly defines the point of that paragraph.

2. List—On a separate sheet of paper, write out every sentence you’ve underlined and written in the margins. When you’re finished, you should have a list of sentences that illustrate each of your essay’s main points.

3. Brainstorm—If there are main points that you would like to make in your essay that do not appear in this list, take the time to add them to the list now. You may also list minor points that you want to include in your essay, but each point should be written as a complete sentence. The idea is to have each sentence serve as a single point or idea.

4. Organize—Think of the natural and logical order in which you should explain all of these points to your reader. Think of your destination—what you want your reader to realize when he’s finished reading your essay. Order is important since the reader does not know the point of each paragraph or where you’re going next in your analysis. You might try numbering each sentence in the order in which you’re considering placing it in your essay.

5. Write it out—On a separate sheet of paper, begin by writing the first sentence that is the first point you want to make in your essay. Write only in complete sentences on this page. Then, identify the next sentence that states the next point you want to make. Before you write it down, write a complete sentence that links these two separate sentences (these two points) together. This sentence IS the transition between your ideas.
o Think logically.
What do these ideas have to do with one another?

o Think about your reader.
What can I say here that will help make my points easy to follow?

o Think about your main point and destination.
Where is my argument going?
How do each of these points relate to my main idea?

After writing the transition sentence, write the sentence from your list that illustrates the next point you want to make. Then, write another transition sentence, and then another sentence from your list that illustrates your next point. Continue this pattern until you’ve used every sentence from your list and connected each of them with a transition sentence.

6. Revise—Go home and apply this exercise to your draft.
Cut and paste your paragraphs and sentences. Use the transition sentences you’ve created here, write new ones, and combine old and new sentences when needed. Add to or combine paragraphs that are incomplete, too short, or don’t fully make a single point. Insert new paragraphs when needed, but make sure you follow through with new transitions.
o Review the Basic Paragraphing Rules listed on this handout.
o Remember to re-read the ENTIRE essay from start to finish once you think you’re done to make sure that everything flows and makes sense in the new order you’ve created.

[The following instructions are written for you, the instructor.]

EXERCISE #2: FOCUSING ON SENTENCE-TO-SENTENCE TRANSITIONS

Materials Needed: Second or Third draft of current essay
Scissors and tape
Blank pages

Reading: (Specifically) Scott Foresman 233-234

1. Select—Have students select a body paragraph from their essays and cut it free from the rest of the paper.

2. Cut and Separate—Next, instruct the students to cut each sentence in that paragraph free so that they will have a small collection of independent sentences in front of them when they finish.

3. Shuffle—Shuffle the sentences around.

4. Reorganize—Instruct the students to tape the sentences to one blank page in a random order. They should not try to recreate their original order.

5. Make Meaning with Transitions—Then, explain to the students that the goal of this exercise is to make “sense” of the new order of sentences in the paragraph by using transitional statements or connectors from sentence to sentence to give the paragraph a logical, smooth flow.

6. Write it Out—On another blank page, have the students rewrite the paragraph, in its new order, utilizing sentence-to-sentence transitions. When they are finished, the sentences will essentially be different from when they started because students will have added new material to connect idea to idea.

7. Revise—Tell students to apply this technique when they go home. Encourage them to see that the original sentence order they have can be played with and rearranged. Remind them that they can create connectivity with existing sentence order by providing sentence-to-sentence transitions.

[The following instructions are written for you, the instructor.]

EXERICISE #3: BRAINSTORMING FOR TRANSITIONS

[No draft necessary for this exercise option. Students can work in small, 2-3 person groups or by themselves.]

1. Create Two Topics Forums—Create two columns on the blackboard. Have students
think of a topic heading for each column. Both should be headings that students have a lot of ideas about: movies, magazines, campus issues, current issues in the media. Encourage them to select two topic headings that may relate to each other in some way. A possible strategy could be to ask for one heading topic and then ask for a different topic that is loosely related.

2. Brainstorm and List—Ask students for ideas that fit with the topic in each column. List about five ideas in each column.

3. Write It Out—Instruct students to create two paragraphs. One paragraph will unify the
ideas from the first column; another paragraph will unify ideas from the second column. Remind them that they should try to connect ideas in each paragraph with sentence-to-sentence transitions and that they should connect the main ideas of the paragraphs with a broad, paragraph level transition. Students can arrange the ideas of the columns in any way they like; they can also arrange the second column’s information to precede the first’s if they like. It’s all up to them.

4. Discuss—After the class has finished with the exercise, ask for volunteers to read their paragraphs. Ask the class to take notes about what’s working well and what could be stronger about the flow and connectivity of the paragraphs. Create a discussion by examining a number of student’s paragraphs and pointing out strengths and weaknesses of the transitions created.

[The following instructions are written for you, the instructor.]

EXERCISE #4: SMOOTING TRANSITIONS BETWEEN PARAGRAPHS

Required Materials: 2nd or 3rd Draft of current essay and scissors

1. Divide the class into groups of three or four students. Everyone should use their own paper, but hopefully students assist one another in this process.

2. Give each group a few pairs of scissors and have them cut up their drafts by the paragraph.

3. Have them rearrange their paragraphs, shaking up the order of their paper. They must use transitions (hopefully transition ideas they have learned from the Foresman) to smooth the flow of the new version of their paper and make it readable.

4. After about fifteen minutes, have the students “report” on their findings. Do they understand what transitions are now? Were they able to use transitions effectively? Did they realize that they had been writing jumbled/scrambled papers all along?

Critical Reading & Thinking Exercise

Critical Reading and Thinking Exercise

Patrick Braley, Flore Chevaillier, Manny Lofdahl, & Phil Robey

Activity Accompanies “Critical Thinking” The Scott Foresman Handbook, pg. 142-155

Time Required: 30 minutes

Goals/Purpose: Exploring and analyzing writing with a critical eye. Too often students read visual and written texts, they rarely comprehend them. Even if they do understand the material presented, when asked to discuss the texts most only engage the topic superficially. They either like/dislike or agree/disagree with the text. Though valid responses, the students rarely elaborate on why they feel that way about the texts. Often, a lack of practice in the skills necessary for reading critically is the cause. This exercise will allow the students the opportunity to engage with a text: make notes, highlight unknown words and phrases, argue with the author, and question the written word for validity.

Description: Critical Reading. This exercise calls for the students to evaluate and freewrite on a text of your choice (an ad, an editorial, a TV commercial, etc.).

Procedure:

1. Find some opinion-oriented piece of writing/visual material of substantial length and make enough copies for the class.
2. Have the students read the appropriate section in SFH the night before and go over the main points in class to refresh their memory.
3. Allow the students to read the text and employ the strategies outlined in SFH. Suggest to the students that the read it once straight through and then begin to engage with the text. Have them employ the “believing and doubting”
4. Ask questions as the students are writing to help them along, such as, “What is the author’s point?”, “What do you agree with? Disagree with?”, “What is confusing?”, “Is the author effective in achieving their goal in the text?”, etc.
5. Allow the students five to ten minutes to freewrite a response to the text and pursue as they see fit.

Follow up: Ask the students to bring a page of an opinion-oriented piece of their own. Have them read it to the rest of the class. While the student reads his/her piece, students will write down and evaluate the different points of the presented argument. You can then discuss how to improve the piece using some of the tools they have while reading the Handbook and your selected text.

Dear John Paul II

DEAR JOHN PAUL II

Mandy Catron & Sarah Brandeberry

Time Required: 30 minutes

Activity Accompanies The Scott Foresman Handbook for Writers, Seventh Edition, Chapter 18.

Goal/Purpose: Teach students how to use language based on audience & register

Procedure:
1. Have students write an email in journals to their best friend describing a wild party that they recently attended. This story can be completely fabricated, but should include many specific details. Encourage students to be creative. Allow approx. 5 minutes for this entry. This can also be done as a class email on the board.

2. Have the students rewrite the email as a letter to their high school principal, grandmother, the Pope, etc. (They can do this either separately or in groups). Emphasize that they must write about the same party and same general events. Allow approx. 5 minutes for this entry.

3. Ask one or more of the students to volunteer to read both letters to the class. Then discuss with the students the differences between the two letters. Encourage students to explore the relationship between audience and levels of formality.

4. Make three column headings on the board: Formal, Informal and Casual. Write a word in the Informal column and have the students come up with synonyms to put in the Formal and Casual categories. For example, for the word “party,” students might respond with “kegger” or “hoedown” in the casual category and “gala” or “reception” in the formal category. Try to choose words that have popular slang alternatives. Students respond well to words like: butt, drunk, dance, bad and good.

5. Then, draw a line above the chart ranging from Casual to Formal and have students discuss where different types of writing fall on the scale. Examples include research papers, thank you notes, an email to a professor or friend, journal entries and personal essays. Take a few minutes to explain how this relates to audience and register.

6. Encourage students to reread current drafts with consideration to audience. Have them pick out areas where different word choices would be more appropriate.

Editing Paragraphs

Editing Paragraphs

Jason Freels, Danielle Robitaille and Doug Root

Activity Accompanies The Scott Foresman Handbook

Time Required: A Class Period

Goal/Purpose: The purpose of this exercise is to help students identify appropriate paragraphs for specific rhetorical situations. While this exercise helps students learn to vary the lengths of paragraphs, it will also help them focus on understanding the expectations of their audience. In addition, it will allow students to use the Scott-Foresman Handbook to aid them in their attempts to determine key elements of proper paragraph formation.

Procedure: Step One – Essentially, the idea that we developed involves using three different types of media in expressing the variation which exists among paragraph length/structure. The first example would be something literary which is widely accepted despite the fact that it may not meet the conventional notions of “proper” grammar or mechanics. In this case, we opted to use the opening paragraph from Henry David Thoreau’s “Where I Lived, and What I Lived For” from Walden:

“At a certain season of our life we are accustomed to consider every spot as the possible site of a house. I have thus surveyed the country on every side within a dozen miles of where I live. In imagination I have bought all the farms in succession, for all were to be bought, and I knew their price. I walked over each farmer’s premises, tasted his wild apples, discoursed on husbandry with him, took his farm at his price, at any price, mortgaging it to him in my mind; even put a higher price on it, - took everything but a deed of it, - took his word for his deed, for I dearly loved to talk, - cultivated it, and him too to some extent, I trust, and withdrew when I had enjoyed it long enough, leaving him to carry it on. This experience entitled me to be regarded as a sort of real-estate broker by my friends. Wherever I sat, there I might live, and the landscape radiated from me accordingly. What is a house but a sedes, a seat? – better if a country seat. I discovered many a site for a house not likely to be soon improved, which some might have thought too far from the village, but to my eyes the village was too far from it. Well, there I might live, I said; and there I did live, for an hour, a summer and a winter life; saw how I could let the years run off, buffet the winter through, and see the spring come in. The future inhabitants of this region, wherever they may place their houses, may be sure that they have been anticipated. An afternoon sufficed to lay out the land into orchard woodlot and pasture, and to decide what fine oaks or pines should be left to stand before the door, and whence each blasted tree could be seen to the best advantage; and then I let it lie, fallow perchance, for a man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone” (387).

Students should convene in groups and identify the five key components according to the SFH regarding paragraph structure and have them break these ideas down to develop new paragraphs (in a sample such as this, there should easily be 2-4 new paragraphs). At such a point, the students should consider Thoreau’s audience and the stylistic appeal that he utilizes to engage the reader/make his desired point.

Step 2: Students will repeat this process with a different form of medium (i.e. The FSView, Tallahassee Democrat, etc.). The objective of this aspect of the activity is to better disseminate the difference in literature (particularly wordy literature, like Thoreau) and mass media (like newspapers) where efficient, economical language reigns supreme. (If paragraphs like Thoreau’s were to appear in The Washington Post, readership might decline significantly). Also, students can look at the use of “economic” language in the sense that perhaps in documents like newspapers, paragraphs can often be too short or glib for the sake of easy readership.

Step 3: Have students bring in an outside source of their own – preferably something aside from literature or a newspaper (since those will have been touched on by the instructor). This source can be anything from a magazine to an advertisement with extensive word use.

Conclusion: Hopefully the activity will show students that different forms/lengths of paragraphs are more acceptable in certain venues; ultimately, there is no exclusively right or wrong way to write a paragraph, but students should realize that in 5-8 page explications, paragraphs of Thoreauvian proportion are certainly not necessary/beneficial to achieving the goal of being reader-friendly. Conversely, although the SFH states that one sentence paragraphs can stand on their own, they also are not the norm in acceptability and overuse of such a technique can be jarring and disorienting for the reader. Of course, by attempting to make the students realize that a major ideal of writing with stylistic variation is to achieve a friendly rapport with the reader, students will realize the inextricable link between their writing and knowing the expectations of their audience.

Integrating Sources

Integrating Sources
by Kajsa Henry

Activity Accompanies the Scott Foresman Handbook
How do you Handle Quotations?
Pages 751-757

Time Required: 50 mins

Goal/Purpose: To give students the tools necessary to recognize material that should or can be used as "good" secondary support within their paper. Students often cannot recognize when it is a good idea to quote directly and/or paraphrase or summarize.

Procedure:

1. Have students bring in a source they are thinking about using, maybe after the first draft.
Discuss what makes a quotation necessary or usable on pages 751-753.
2. Have the students to investigate their source and come up with one possible direct quote and/or one area that could be summarized or paraphrased.
3. Discuss the correct way of using the verbs of attribution listed on page 753. Use example from the following page.
4. Have students complete the project by writing a paragraph or two using the source material.
5. Then have the students use a partner to critique whether or not they think the students has effectively used the material.
6. It may be necessary for the instructor to review them also and briefly give comments.

Additional Comments: It may be helpful to use one of OOW essays, such as Muzzle Flash: The Symbol of a Violent Culture. Then create a handout of two paragraphs of additional source material that fits into the subject matter and have the students use that to complete the exercise. It will also be a change to investigate whether or not the author of that essay correctly integrated the source material. This exercise can also be used to facilitate a discussion on parenthetical citations and the conventions of quotations.

Interviewing Exercise

Interviewing Exercise

Bill Eville

Activity Accompanies pages 712-716 in the Scott Foresman Handbook. These pages introduce the idea of conducting interviews to beef up a research paper.

Time Required: The time needed for this exercise is about 30 minutes. You can do it in a shorter amount of time but I think you would be undercutting its effectiveness.

Goal/Purpose: The goal of this exercise is to get students over the hump of being afraid of actually approaching someone to conduct an interview. All the technique lectures in the world won’t help if the student can’t first overcome the very real fear of asking a stranger questions.

Procedure: After discussing the benefits of including interviews in their research papers I go over the nuts and bolts of how to conduct an interview. Then, just as their eyes begin to glass over, I tell them to leave the classroom and spend about 10 minutes interviewing anyone they encounter on campus. I also give them their first question, which is, “What are you doing tonight.” It’s a simple but also purposely loaded question because I want the students to experience the thrill of letting the interview go wherever the speaker takes it. When the interview is done the students return to class and spend about 10 minutes writing it up. Then we read a few of these aloud. The results are priceless.

For example, in most cases the students preface the question by telling the interviewee that they are in a class and their teacher is making them do the interview. However, in one case a scantily dressed Sorority girl forgot to give a context for her question. The young man to whom she asked, “What you doing tonight?” responded immediately with, “I don’t know sugar, what are you doing tonight?” Despite the provocative beginning the interview continued and we all learned quite a bit about the man who said he would spend most of his evening, ‘smoking weed.’

Students from both my classes accosted the woman who works at the hot dog stand. In the first interview we learned she was going to the movies, etc., etc. However, in the second interview the student became more interested in what life was like working at that food stand and so re-directed the focus of the interview. It was a perfect example of letting one’s curiosity drive the piece rather than adhering to the pre-packaged question.

Additional Comments: This exercise works especially well when given on a Thursday or Friday because there’s apt to be more excitement generated by the interviewee about what they are doing that night.

Plagiarism Exercise

Plagiarism Exercise

Molly Hand and Roger Siebert

Activity Accompanies The Scott Foresman Handbook for Writers

Part VII ("Research and Writing"), Section 49 ("How Do You Use Sources Responsibly?"), Subsection D ("Do You Understand Academic Responsibility?")

Supplemental sources: Bruce Ballenger's The Curious Researcher, fourth edition, pages 130-39, and the Purdue University Online Writing Lab (OWL) Web site (http://owl.english.purdue.edu)

Time Required: thirty minutes, or up to an entire class period, depending on how much detail or repetition the instructor feels is pertinent for that particular group of students

Goal/Purpose: to supplement the mandatory plagiarism exercises first-year writing students complete at the beginning of ENC1101. This supplement is designed for ENC1102, 1142, and 1145--classes that involve research writing.

Procedure: This is a writing exercise, and we recommend collecting work and reading over it so that you can get a feeling for the particular problems students might be having.

First: Ask students to take out blank pieces of paper and have them define "plagiarism." Then have them define "common knowledge," "paraphrasing," "quoting," and "summarizing." Ask them to state which method they normally use (if any) in research writing (if they've done any; most were required to write a research paper in high school). Take a few moments and discuss their answers. Try to come up with a working definition of common knowledge. In The Curious Researcher, Ballenger writes that common knowledge is something everyone knows, but his example, the date John Kennedy was shot, is problematic because a lot of students don't know that! The Purdue University OWL site (URL listed above and below) defines common knowledge quantitatively, which might help clarify the concept for students (and yourself). They state that an item is common knowledge: 1) if "[y]ou find the same information undocumented in at least five other sources," 2) if "[y]ou think it is information that your readers will already know," and 3) if "[y]ou think a person could easily find the information with general reference sources" (http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/research/r_plagiar.html) During the discussion, you should probably end by saying, "When in doubt, cite."

Second: Have students do exercise 3.2 in The Curious Researcher, the "Say Back" exercise. As Ballenger suggests, explain the pitfalls of paraphrasing, that paraphrasing is actually plagiarism if it does not put a phrase in quotations that comes directly from the source, if it copies the author's style (even if it does not employ the same words) or syntax, or if it does not include a parenthetical citation. Explain that even if the student includes a parenthetical citation, if a reader cannot distinguish between the student's words and ideas and those of the source, then the student has plagiarized. After discussing and answering questions on paraphrasing, have students exchange "say backs" and read to see if their classmates' paraphrases are really plagiarism (Ballenger's suggestion).

Third: Give students a handout with a short paragraph that you have composed (or you can use the one below). The paragraph should include both paraphrases and quotes, but no parenthetical citations. Have students read the paragraph and show where they think citations should go (chances are, they'll put them after the quotes but probably not after the paraphrases). Then hand out the excerpt from which you are quoting/paraphrasing and have students go over your paragraph again, citing after paraphrases and circling paraphrases that should be in quotes or that copy the author's style so closely as to warrant rewording.

Fourth: Discuss other elements of plagiarism; address any questions or lingering concerns. Some additional items you could cover are the facts that a student can "plagiarize" his/her own work by using the same paper for two courses; that current copyright law does not require the copyright symbol or a copyright statement in order for a work to be protected by law; and that even using someone else's original ideas (not just his/her words) without credit is plagiarism. Importantly, you'll want to emphasize that quoting is safer than paraphrasing, which they should be able to understand after having completed these exercises.

You'll of course want to go over as much pertinent plagiarism information as you see fit for your particular class, but we emphasize covering paraphrasing and its dangers in detail because so many students tend to do this, and do it poorly--they plagiarize. This exercise is preventative maintenance.

Citation exercise original text:
It is difficult, in the wake of the sixties' youth rebellion, to appreciate the weight and authority that once attached to the word "maturity." Looking back on his first marriage in the 1950s, A Alvarez wrote in 1981, "I had this terrible lust for premature maturity, this irresponsible desire for responsibility, before I had any idea what maturity involved or had ever tasted the pleasures of youthful irresponsibility." Maturity was not dull, but "heroic," a measured acceptance of the limits of one's private endeavors at a time when action on a broader political scale could only seem foolish--or suspect. Novels like The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit and Marjorie Morningstar endorsed maturity, and the 1950 bestseller The Mature Mind held it up as an evolutionary achievement. (Ehrenreich 17)
--Ehrenreich, Barbara. The Hearts of Men: American Dreams and the Flight from Commitment. New York: Anchor Books, 1983.

Paraphrase:
Ehrenreich writes that contemporary audiences may have a hard time comprehending the gravity denoted by the word "maturity" in the 1950s. She quotes A Alvarez, who explains that he had a lust for "premature maturity" before he had any real idea of what being mature and responsible entailed. Maturity in the 1950s was not boring, but valiant; to be mature was to prove one's worth in an acceptable form, whereas taking political action was deemed "foolish" or "suspect." Novels such as The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit and Marjorie Morningstar affirmed the value of maturity, and the 1950 bestseller The Mature Mind "held it up as an evolutionary achievement."

Additional Comments: We suggest, among other things, referring to The Curious Researcher, and we like Ballenger's section on 133-34, "Why Plagiarism Matters." Also, if you use Purdue University's OWL site, you should read their "fair use" page thoroughly first.

Invention Exercises

Abstract Shapes

Abstract Shapes
by Seth Kahn-Egan

Time Required: 15-20 minutes
Goals/Purpose: To teach description skills, and to illustrate difficulties with describing objects an audience has not yet seen.
Description: Abstract Shapes. Students find this exercise both fun and frustrating. I like to use this at that point in the semester when students think they have learned everything they need to know; we’ve been through several invention and revision strategies, and they think they have it all down pat ...
Origin: My wife Chrys taught me this exercise. She uses it in her public speaking classes.

Procedure:

1. Divide students into pairs. Ask the pairs to move so that one person is facing the chalkboard and one person is facing away from it. The person facing away from the board needs paper and pen/pencil.
2. Once the people who are supposed to be facing away from the board are situated, draw an abstract shape (any combination of lines, arcs, shapes, symbols, etc.) on the board.
3. Let the student facing the board see the board look at the picture for about 30 seconds. Then give them two minutes to describe it to their partners. The describers are not allowed to use their hands at all. The partners who are listening to the descriptions must try to draw what is being described to them.
4. Once time is up, ask each pair to display their results to the class. If you want, you can be the judge and give the group that comes closest a prize.
5. Have group members switch roles and repeat this exercise with a new abstract image.
6. Once the second round is over, hold a class discussion about the difficulties students encountered in either or both roles. Which job did they think was harder? Why did you ask them to do this exercise? And so on.

This exercise shows students how complex the relationship between an object and the language we use to describe can be. The describers see that their words may mean very different things to different people. Describers also begin to see how revising their language revises the meanings that audiences construct. The listeners see that there’s no such thing as "face value" in words, and that they actively interpret every word they see and hear

Between the Lines

Between the Lines
by Elizabeth Trelenberg

Time Required: 45 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise is an attempt to appropriate the word: the writer attempts to "get at" or capture the unspoken text generated by the written text.
Description: Between the Lines. When we read "between the lines" we are trying to find the implied meaning. By writing between the lines, we are attempting to put into words and meaning that may have been merely implied.
Origin: Inspired by Bakhtin, particularly his assertions that "language for the individual consciousness, lies on the borderline between oneself and the other."

Procedure:

1. Discuss the phrase "reading between the lines". How can one read between the lines when there is nothing (no visible text) to read?
2. Have the students choose a paragraph they have written that they are not satisfied with, or would like to explore. Focus on a particular phrase, sentence, or idea.
3. Explore the selected passage, thinking about what is unsaid or ambiguous, in other words, freewrite on the selected text.
4. Read the original passage with the freewrite. How has the meaning been amplified or changed?
5. Select a point of focus from the freewrite, and freewrite again on this idea.
6. Again, evaluate in writing how this has helped provide a context for the original text.
7. Switch papers with a classmate, and have the classmate read the text without the freewriting initially, and then with the added text. Ask the students to write how the meaning has been magnified or altered.

Obviously, this exercise generates more text (with more unwritten text), but considered in the light of the original text, each will add to the other, defining rather than diffusing the meaning. This exercise works very well when used with Chapter 9 of The Subject is Writing and should be used in conjunction with that chapter if possible.

Brain Teaser

Brain Teaser
by Mark Hamilton

Time Required: At least 10 minutes but it can go as long as 40 minutes without becoming tedious.
Goals/Purpose: Creative thinking, developing voice and sarcasm
Description: Brain Teaser. This exercise gets you students to think creatively by requiring them to write with one of their main tools (word choice) tied behind their back, forcing them to compensate and, consequently, develop other aspects of their voice.
Origin: Idea was developed from Wendy Bishop’s book Working Words.

Procedure:
Give your students a group of words, usually vocabulary words that you use in class or, better yet, in their reading, and ask them to describe certain occupations or entities usually not grouped with those words. For instance, I might give words like "Cornucopian", "Opulent", or "Affluent" and ask them to use these words to describe a beggar. Or I might ask them to describe Arnold Schwarzeneger using the words "Tenuous", "Feeble", and "Sickly". The trick is for them to creatively--using other components of style, namely their imagination but also things like tome and sentence structure--to describe these people or things by their adjective antonyms. Importantly, they can’t ever say that the beggar was not "any of those things".

Perhaps they’ll compare him to other beggars, i.e. "he was an upper-class, high faluting, rather opulently dressed beggar", or perhaps they’ll have the beggar imagine being such things when he isn’t; it doesn’t matter. The exercises main goal is to improve their creativity, forcing them to write out of a difficult situation with something other than word choice. Take note of the ways students try to get out of it--because this is an exercise that you can use at least once more--although I’ve never been brave enough to--using different words, of course, and with different objects to describe. The second time makes their first escape techniques taboo.

This exercise encourages students to think sarcastically, which is something I desire for my students, because I think it gives them a much more unique voice than a completely serious style.

Commercial Break!!

Commercial Break!!
by Emily Dowd

This exercise is designed to work with Paper #1 of the Engaging Cultural Mediums strand in ENC1101, but I’ve also tested it out on my ENC1102 students in prep for the “Respond to and Analyze a ‘Text’” (Paper #3) in the Exploring Ourselves, Our Culture, and Beyond strand. The goal is to get students thinking critically about their childhood experiences with television in a personal, creative way. This exercise may turn into their paper, or it may simply stimulate their thinking about what they watched and how much those programs and commercials affected them.
(You may want to write-up an example of a TV memory to get them moving in the right direction.)

Ask the class what their favorite shows were as kids: cartoons, sitcoms, even documentaries. You may want to bring in a few stills to project (in a tech class), and ask if anyone remembers them (I brought the Cosby Show, Ren & Stimpy, etc).

Once you’ve got a nice variety of TV programs, ask the class to freewrite for 5-10 minutes (however long you wish to tell them) in first-person POV about their experience watching a show like these as a kid. They should be specific and detailed, writing whatever comes to memory about what’s going on in the program and their thoughts/reactions/and situation as they watch. What are the characters doing? What does the animation, clothing, setting look like? Are you excited as the show comes on? What kind of viewer are you: young, girl, boy, etc? Be as vivid and in-the-moment as possible (you can make it up if you can’t remember). But, most importantly, JUST WRITE.

Reading your example may help get them thinking about how to approach it.
[Ex: I rush in the door from school, straight to the sofa - just in time to catch the first scene of Animaniacs. My 12-year-old younger brother is already there, digging into a bag of Doritos. “Hey, pass that over here,” I demand. Meanwhile, the three catty siblings, 2 boys and a girl in a skirt and a flower on her head (and I guess that’s supposed to be hair), escape from their water tower on the Warner Brothers lot on cue to the lyrics of their theme song. “While Bill Clinton Plays the Sax… We’re ANIMANIAAAAACS! And those are the facts!” The Animaniac’s cute, black and white bodies resemble cats, but I’m never sure. Sometimes I think we’re not supposed to know. I wait impatiently for the spiel to end and the skits to begin, hoping against hope that it’s NOT Rita the obnoxious singing cat, or that STUPID Dog and that ANNOYING baby – is that dog’s name Bubbles? Yeah, no Bubble, please. OH, YESSSS! “Pinky and the Brain” kick-off the program, a very promising start. Now all I need to perfect the mix is “Dot’s Poetry Corner,” and I’ll be set.]

Give them ample time to get into their memories, but try to catch them while they’re still writing.

Now, STOP!! – It’s a commercial break. Exchange your TV Show with a neighbor. Quickly read the ‘memory’, keeping in mind how the show is presented and the audience that appears to be watching it – your own memories may help here, too. Now, describe an actually or otherwise appropriate commercial segment for the broadcast at this time. Try to match your ‘voice’ to the original author’s, so that your commercial break fits in with the narrative. What does the narrator do when the commercial comes on? How would they perceive it? Think fast!

Give the class about 5 minutes to complete their commercial segments before asking them to pass the freewrite back to its original author. Ask for volunteers to read their shows aloud, including the commercial break. Was this an appropriate commercial? Why do you think this commercial aired during this show time? Was the narrator’s reaction to the show and commercial typical? Why or why not? Discuss the influence these stimuli have had on us. Discuss target audience, and the factors that go into programming: time of day, gender, age, visuals, etc. What do students notice about the types of ads that air during certain programs? And finally, how might this offer an option for their paper?

Exploring Culture

Exploring Culture
by Deborah Hall

Time Required: At least 20 minutes plus discussion time
Goals/Purpose: Exploring culture and what images (and/or words) motivates people. The purpose is to make students aware of the influences by which they are surrounded, to become alert to that influence and to analyze it through freewriting of their observations. They must also form words (thus think more carefully) for visual stimulation--something they usually take for granted.
Description: Exploring Culture allows students to evaluate and freewrite about a particular advertisement from a magazine.

Procedure:

1. Pass out ads and allow students to choose one.
2. Allow them to study the ad while you explain the purpose of this exercise. Remind students that real people are imagining these ads with a target audience in mind.
3. Ask them questions: "What is the ad selling?" "What kind of visual stimulation are they using?" "Who is the audience?" "What might happen in you...buy the dress, drink the Bacardi, etc.?" "Do you become cool?"
4. Begin freewriting on all the descriptive elements that you pick up from the ad. Fell free to diverge into some other area that the ads stimulates.
5. Allow five to ten minutes for writing.

Discussion:

* What kind of discoveries did you make?
* How does that make you fell about these companies?
* The ads must be successful or they wouldn’t be spending vast sums of money to run them. Is this invasive?
* What about persuasive writing?
* How much are we responsible for our own critical thinking? And can we blame the companies for capitalizing off our absence of critique?
* Did anyone diverge? (Let them read aloud) Anyone get any great ideas about something you’d like to write about?

Fortune Cookies

Fortune Cookies
by John Grosskopf

Time Required: 15-30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This is a "stretching exercise" that calls for students to expand and develop a particular thought, then revise and narrow the scope of that thought.
Description: Responding to Fortune Cookies. This is a fun exercise that can be used to help pull students out of a writing slump or after a long weekend.
Origin: Inspired by Susan Wheeler’s "Exercises for Discovery, Experiment, Skills, and Play" in Nuts and Bolts.

Procedure:

1. Each student chooses their own fortune cookie and writes down their fortune at the top of a clean page. Have a few extra cookies on hand in case some students receive a fortune that is too cryptic or for ones that the student just doesn’t like.
2. If the student enjoys fortune cookies they may now eat them, otherwise the teacher should take this moment to gather and discard unwanted cookies.
3. Now give the students a few moments to consider their fortunes, then ask them to rewrite their fortune in a few sentences. They can adapt and expand their fortunes but they must stick to the original spirit and intent of the fortune. For example, a prediction about the student’s personality should remain about their personality and not stray to other possibilities like future success, relationships and so on.
4. Now tell the students to underline any strong words or descriptions they wrote in their revised fortunes. These should be whatever words make a strong impression on the student.
5. Now using the underlined words as a guide, have the students write a short fortune for themselves that would be appropriate to put inside a fortune cookie.. Don’t feel constrained by Chinese Restaurant language, do it in your own words.
6. Discuss the new fortunes with in groups or share with the entire class. Consider the nature of the types of changes that were made and question why the student made those changes. The teacher could then ask the students to use the underlined words as key words in an idea cluster or tree to develop other personal ideas for a longer piece of writing.

I believe this gives students a light stretching exercise before a good writing workout. It encourages them to think about themselves and try to capture some narrow aspect of their individual charter, or hopes or fears, and narrow them down to just a few words. Then they are given an opportunity to expand on these few words and say more about themselves.

Hypertext

Hypertext
by Kathryn Martens

Time Required: At least 30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: Hypertext is an early-semester exercise, hopefully to be conducted within the first two or three class periods. Its intent is to open students to a variety of other voices. Hypertext can also be used as an icebreaker exercise, intended to reveal students’ varying backgrounds. Failure of the exercise can be useful too, as a measure of how willing or unwilling various students may be to talk about themselves.
Description: Hypertext is inspired by "links" technology on the Internet. Hypertext is a language through which certain words in a line of text are highlighted in a different color, signifying that there is a "link" from that word to an entirely different page of text. The concept of hypertext in English is similar, but more metaphysical. Any person can look at the exact same sentence or passage and think entirely different things, purely because of the links to his or her different pages of personal experience.

Procedure:

1. Write a sentence on the board, highlighting certain words. The sentence can be basic, but possibly polarizing. For example: "The cat reached the tree two feet ahead of the dog that was chasing him."
2. Ask them to freewrite for five minutes on each of the underlined words, "cat," "tree," and "dog." Build up the classroom pressure with a few prompts before each. "Think of a cat you once owned, or knew. What was its name? What did it like to do? Was it your chore to clean out the catbox?" For the second writing, "What kind of tree was it? Where was it? Could you climb it?" For the third, "Did you own a dog, or know one? Was it a neighbor’s dog that took dumps on your lawn?" Then let them loose.
3. After each freewrite, ask the students to read their work.

With any luck, the students will start their own discussion. Cat-lovers in the classroom will probably be on the defensive; dog lovers will be a bit amused. Even though the discussion may be a bit sophomoric(!), there will be quite a bit of it. The point is not to produce deep insight, but rather to get students talking and interacting with each other on a fun, personal basis--and to realize that the very same sentence produces a multitude of information, all of it different, all of it equal, all of it worth hearing.

In Quest of Culture

In Quest of Culture
by Emily Dowd

A Topic-generating Exercise for the Interrogating Culture Strand based on Bruce Ballenger’s The Curious Researcher

This exercise helps students learn how to ask the right questions when beginning a research-oriented assignment. By asking them to generate questions about a seemingly uninteresting object, this activity demonstrates the infinite possibilities and important aspects of researchable topics. You’ll find a variation of the exercise discussed under “The Myth of the Boring Topic” in The Curious Researcher (4th ed, 34-36). I’m also indebted to Ballenger’s talk in February of 2005 at which he demonstrated a version of this called “Passing the Bottle.”

You might discuss the “Myth of the Boring Topic” with the class. What’s there to write about? How do I approach something that I can research? How can I be sure my topic’s not too broad, too narrow, too boring? What is there to write about “culture”?

Estimated time: 30 minutes – full class period

STEP 1: You might ask students what cultural artifacts they carry with them this very moment. It could be cell phone, a pair of designer glasses, a magazine, Desani bottled water, a dollar bill. Collect a few of these items, or supply some of your own.

STEP 2: Divide the class into groups of four or five. Give each group one iconic, cultural artifact. For about 10-20 minutes, ask each group to generate a list of “potentially interesting questions” about their object. Ask them to consider the objects in terms of:

* Cultural uses
* Possible impact on people
* Processes of creation or development

STEP 3: After 10-20 min., ask your groups to trade objects AND the lists already generated for them. Give them about 5 minutes to consider the new object, and come up with questions the previous group didn’t think of.

STEP 4: Return original objects and questions to their groups. Overhead, or on the blackboard, discuss the characteristics of good researchable topics. I’ve modified Ballenger’s list of “What Makes a Question ‘Researchable’?” (35):

* Not too broad or too narrow
* Focuses on some aspect of the topic about which something has been said (it CAN be researched)
* It’s interesting to YOU
* Answers the question “SO WHAT?” (Relates to how we live, might live, care about, believe, or what we should know)
* Implies a potential audience (part 2, of the question above)
* Implies an approach – how you might go about answering it
* Raises more questions that can’t be answered with “Yes” or “No”

Each group should review their list of questions, and choose ONE they find both interesting and the most researchable. Ballenger asks students to imagine that they are a team of editors working on a new magazine project, and this is precisely the kind of focus we want for this researched article. Ask each group to propose/pitch their topic, with an initial starting question, to the “board room” with the following considerations:

* What’s my publication? (specific, or a general idea: magazine, Cable program, newspaper, journal, etc.)
* Who’s my main interest group/audience?
* What’s my narrative position?

Ballenger continues with approaches through “People,” “Trends,” “Controversies,” “Impact,” and “Relationships” (35-36) – all of which apply to our cultural perspective for the research article/exposé. You can wrap-up discussion by asking students to pose other questions, modify ones from their lists, or examine the possibilities Ballenger offers.

Making Connections

Making Connections
by Billie Bennett

Time Required: At least 30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise gives students the opportunity to use critical thinking skills by asking them to create connections between things that seem to be very different, and encourage students to express comparisons and/or contrasts in original language that they have created, and possibly avoid use of clichés.
Description: Making Connections asks students to make connections between unrelated concepts.
Origin: Thia Wolf’s "Writing as a Tool for Learning and Discovery" in The Subject is Writing, and Marsella and Hilgers’ "Exploring the Potential of Freewriting" in Background Readings for Instructors Using The Bedford Handbook for Writers.

Procedure:

1. Ask students to make a jot list of things they like and feel strongly about. Ask them to think of this as a list of possible paper topics. You may ask them to label this list "A" for sake of convenience. Make your own list on the board if possible.
2. Ask students to make a jot list of things they dislike and feel strongly about. Ask them to think of this as a list of possible paper topics. You may ask them to label this list "B" for sake of convenience. Make your own list on the board if possible.
3. You may ask the students to share some of their items from these two lists and discuss the strength of some of them as paper topics.
4. Ask students to consider their lists and think about which of these items could be good paper topics. Then ask them to circle one item from list "A" and one item from list "B".
5. Ask students to do a focused freewriting starting with the sentence: "A is like B". Let students freewrite from 5 to 10 minutes (even more time may be necessary). I think this will probably be difficult at first, so it might be a good idea to remind them that their writing is an exploration. You might also want to tell them that they may not end up exactly with "A is like B".
6. When they have finished their writing, ask students if they were able to find a central metaphor or connection from this exploration. If so, how did it help them to look at their subjects in a different way? Tell them that this new perspective may be something may be something they will want to consider if they choose to write on one of these topics.

Map Induced Memory

Map Induced Memory
by Paul Reifenheiser

Time Required: From 20 minutes to an entire class period
Goals/Purpose: To stimulate memories in students. It helps students to look deeply at memories, which hopefully are not often triggered, in an attempt to cause them to expand upon that which may normally remain hidden.
Description: An invention exercise that generates new material that may be crafted into possible ideas for journals, essays, etc. There are two main options for this exercise:

* to create a topic for an essay--such as one where students are asked to write about themselves or about a memory
* to forge a topic to be used in journals. The former may or may not, depending on teacher preferences, delve deeper than the latter.

Origin: This exercise has been adapted from one that I saw in Stephanie Harrell’s class. I think she made up the exercise or stole it from Leo.

Procedure:

1. Ask the students to consider the map of a place of residence or area that they would like to draw, while you show them an example on the board. The map may recreate a house, apartment, etc. from childhood or recent times, preferably an older one but that is not necessary. If desired, the teacher could ask to include a yard, a park, etc.
2. Draw the map of your own place on the board. As you draw each room discuss some of your memories of that room or place. The draw little phrases in or around the room, i.e. DINING ROOM - Broke all of my parent’s best China: BEDROOM - Place where I spent the next week after breaking the China - thus missing my favorite band in concert.
3. Ask the students to take about 5-10 minutes in order to draw their own map and think back to their own memories.
4. After some time has elapsed ask students to choose one memory, preferably one that they had not thought of in some time, from one room. If you wish to use this for a journal, ask them to use that memory as the substance for their journals for next class. If this is going to be used for a possible essay topic then you might want to ask the students to partake of a focused freewriting session with that memory in mind.
5. After freewriting, ask them to read them again and find, as Elbow would note, the "center of gravity" and then freewrite again using that center. Ask them to repeat that step as time permits or until they have found an acceptable, interesting topic for the essay.

My Ten Commandments

My Ten Commandments
by John Grosskopf

Time Required: At least 30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: To get students to think about their own personal codes and understand that their conceptions of right and wrong, and their conceptions of what is ethical or moral, are socially constructed. By examining the issue of how society influences our own personal values we can better understand how what we choose to write about, or not write about, and what we chose to include or leave out of our writing is directly and intimately connected to our socially constructed values.
Description: My Ten Commandments asks students to generate a list of their own personal commandments, and then rank these commandments in various categories to determine how much of our values have been influenced by the different communities which we exist in.

Procedure:

1. Each student is asked to generate a list of their own personal 10 commandments. They don’t all have to be as grandiose as "I’ll never murder" or "I’ll never steal." I tell my students to imagine that they are at a bus stop and are approached by a stranger who has a great deal of money. What are 10 things which that stranger would never be able to convince you to do. I find that students are generally more comfortable with this if you tell them no one but you will see this list--even better, tell them no one else will see it.
2. Ask the students to look over their list and mentally test themselves to see if these commandments are indeed inviolate, or if there are any extreme circumstances under which they would be willing to violate it. (I would not murder someone. But I would kill someone if they were trying to kill my kids, and so on.)
3. Now have your students create a four column graph. In the first column, they listed their Ten Personal Commandments. In the nest column they rated these on how terrible a violation they viewed them to be--1 would be a very minor transgression, while a 10 would be unthinkable. In the third column, they listen the names of the people or institutions most likely to be hurt by these transgressions, and then in the forth column the students gave a rating number to how serious this other party would view this transgression. This leads my students to see that different people, with different values, view each transgression differently, indicating there are no absolutes.
4. Now ask the students to write (journal assignment?) about why there are such discrepancies between the way different persons rate the seriousness of these transgressions. You could ask people to volunteer some of their personal commandments and level of seriousness and generate a list on the board. This will undoubtedly lead to further discussion or additional writing.

Follow Up: This ties in very nicely to the Taboo Paper.

Play It Again, Sam: Analysis vs Summary

Play It Again, Sam: Analysis vs Summary
By: Lisa Nikolidakis

This works in conjunction with any number of papers in the 1101 and 1102 strands, though I used it in 1101 when my students were struggling with the difference between summary and analysis.

Goal: To help students differentiate between analysis and summary, and then apply that knowledge to their own drafts. This works particularly well if the students are doing analysis of visual texts in their papers, though it can be adapted for written texts as well.

Time: Full class

Task:
1. Show an action-packed, short (5 min.) scene from a film. I had success with a clip from Pulp Fiction because it is both entertaining and few of my students have actually seen it. I used the first scene in which Vincent and Jules go to the apartment of the boys who have stolen Marcellus Wallace’s briefcase. I play it from when they walk into the apartment until they shoot them. This scene works well because there are a number of unanswered questions in it (such as what’s in the briefcase that glows bright gold when Vincent opens it).
2. Ask students to write a one-paragraph summary of what they’ve seen.
3. Discuss what they came up with in their summaries. Be sure to note if something they say is analysis. Try to keep them focused on plot so that they understand that summary often does just this. (This is what happens vs why it happens.)
4. Show the clip again. I say I’m doing this to see if we missed anything.
5. When it’s finished, ask them to turn their papers over and write a one-paragraph analysis.
6. Discuss their responses again, noting if something is summary. I write the analytical points on the board. This might take a little prodding, but once they get the hang of it, you should have no shortage of responses. You might also be wary of students jumping to conclusions. Ask them for evidence from the text (film) to support their claims.
7. Take one of the responses—I’d go with the briefcase, which someone will surely mention—and start a deeper, discussion-based analysis. What conclusions can we draw about the briefcase? What might it contain? How do we know this?
8. Ask the students to break into pairs and read each other’s drafts in search of summary, circling the portions they find.
9. Afterwards, have the students discuss how the summary portions might become analysis. I walk around and pop my head into groups as needed. Some get the hang of this right away, and others need a little guidance.

Modifications: You could take any text and make this work (do this with a short story, an excerpt from a graphic novel, a YouTube video, etc…)

Note: This was one of my most successful exercises all semester. My students’ papers were really struggling with differentiating between summary and analysis, and their papers improved vastly after this exercise.

Snap Shots

Snap Shots
by Gabe Rikard

Time Required: At least 20 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise allows students to take a point of view and create a context for it. They then give the pictures purpose in relation to the context they have created. This exercise fosters creativity, the examination of point of view, development of detailed descriptions, and cooperation between students. It forces them to bounce ideas off one another and to create a plausible start for a fictional work using a point of view other than the personal "I".

Procedure:

1. Place students in groups of two, giving each group one picture between them.
2. Separately, each student decides the camera’s point of view, creating a character for that point of view. Telling:
* Who he/she is- include physical description and other pertinent information.
* Where he/she is.
* Why he/she is there- what is the significance of the setting.
* With relevance to this character, find an object in the picture that serves as important to the camera person. Describe what it is and why it is important.
3. Coming back into the groups of two, now take each student’s point of view, including its contextual information, and develop a "lead-in" (a paragraph) for a novel, short story, poem, or essay.

The Exquisite Corpse

The Exquisite Corpse
by Harry McCandless

Time Required: At least 20 minutes
Goals/Purpose: To get students thinking about how language works by having a little underhanded basic grammar refresher, and jarring them, if only briefly, out of the world of our normal conscious uses of language.
Description: The Exquisite Corpse is an idea that, by stringing together random parts of speech, sentences can be constructed which, while they do not make "sense," have, nonetheless, an internal grammatical logic.
Origin: This exercise was developed by the surrealists in the 1920’s.

Procedure:

1. Ask each student to write down two nouns, two adjectives, one verb and one adverb. Color-coded index cards work well for this: designate a color for each part of speech, making sure that there are twice as many cards for nouns and adjectives. Some students who have trouble visualizing what kinds of words fit into each category may feel too embarrassed to ask, so give a few quick examples to get them going.
2. After they have written down their words collect them into four stacks by color and shuffle them.
3. Distribute the cards so that each student once again has a verb, an adverb, and two each of nouns and adjectives. At this point they should begin to arrange their cards to form sentences. Articles and possessive pronouns may be inserted wherever needed and verb tenses may be changed or nouns changed from singular to plural or vice versa. When all are finished go around the room and ask each student to share his or her sentence. Discuss the exercise with the class. Ask them what they got out of it, if anything, and why.

Follow Up: Students could be asked to write a paragraph or a poem around their sentence to share and discuss with the rest of the class.

TV Personalities (Icebreaker)

TV Personalities

This exercise comes from one Bill Eville developed (and is also a simplified variation of one by Dustin). I’ve reworked it so that it coincides with the ENC1101 Engaging Cultural Mediums Strand, but you can apply it many class to get students writing. It makes a great first day introduction to First Year Writing, getting students to relax and think about ‘voice’ while they’re at it. For the ECM Strand, it also gets students thinking about who they see in the media, and analyzing what makes those people/characters what they are.

Start out by asking the class if they like writing. You’ll probably get a roomful of “Noooos!” Ask them if they ever write on their own. Again, most will insist “Never!” Then, of course, as Bill would, exclaim “Excellent!” Throw them for a loop. Ask them if they ever email anybody, or use IM – isn’t this writing? This should cause a bit of a shift in classroom thought, take the opportunity to have the students come-up with a topic – any topic – that they’ve been dealing with in their first days at FSU. If someone yells out, “Parking!” then go with that. Then ask the class to come-up with some different TV/Movie Personas. The Terminator, Paris Hilton – you can throw in something off-the-wall, like Wylie Cayote. When you’ve got about 3 or so characters down, set the students to writing about the situation at FSU from the perspective of each character, one at a time, in 2-4 minute shifts. Encourage them to write in the ‘voice’ of that character (even if it means swearing!), how would that person/thing talk, think and behave?

By the end of the exercise, the students should have 3 brief descriptions of a single situation in 3 different voices. Take some time to share a few, depending on the time that you have.

When I Grow Up

When I Grow Up
by Elizabeth Trelenberg

Time Required: 15 minutes to an entire session
Goals/Purpose: Invention exercise, especially useful for a career paper, or identity paper.
Description: When I Grow Up asks students to remember what their goals and dreams were when they were younger and challenges them to write in that voice and from that position.
Origin: Angel Barbee

Procedure:

1. Ask the students to remember what they wanted to be "when they grew up" when they were younger (from 5 years old to 12 or 13 perhaps). Encourage students to use the voice they would use when they were that age; to write as if they were five years old, for example. Let them freewrite for about 5 minutes on this topic, then have a few of the students share their writing with he class or in small groups ( I usually get lots of volunteers for this one).
2. Next, ask the students to write about what their present plans are for their career, and why they’ve picked their particular career. If they don’t know, ask them to speculate and to write about potential careers that might interest them. Again, have students share their writing.
3. Then ask students to look into the future 5, 10, 15 years; however long they think they need in order to be able to picture themselves now in the world of work. Encourage them to use the voice they think they will have at this time. What are they now doing? Do they like their job? What is " a day in their life" like at this time? Have they attained their goals (a certain salary, promotion, job satisfaction, etc.,)? What goals do they have now? Once again ask the students to share their writing.

My students really seemed to enjoy this exercise, plus some of them included parts of this freewrite in their drafts. One of my students this semester used the last writing assignment as a jumping-off point for her research paper; she did an excellent job. I might add that I’ve had very positive feedback from students regarding this.

Repainting The Starry Night

Repainting The Starry Night
by Lindsey Phillips

Time Required:
30 minutes or an entire class, depending on the length of the discussion

Goals/Purpose:
This exercise will allow the students to critically look at visual images as well as practicing close reading of texts. Moreover, this activity should provide the students with an understanding of the varying interpretations of images. Also, they will begin to see the importance of closely analyzing the image as well as the text, which will lead them to regard the image as a separate form of text that can be closely analyzed.

Description:
For this activity, you will use Vincent Van Gogh’s “The Starry Night,” Robert Fagles’s “The Starry Night.” Anne Sexton’s “The Starry Night,” and Don McLean’s “Vincent” in order to have the students move past summarizing visual images and begin to closely analyze images as they would texts. Students will not only analyze images and texts separately but also see the intersections between visual and textual elements and develop an appreciation for how this relationship can alter our understanding of works that incorporate both aspects (such as films).

Origin:
Robert Atwan’s “Guidelines for Writing about Visual Art” (found in Convergences) provides an understanding of how to analyze an image and how to treat the image as a type of “text.” Atwan’s questions, paired with my love of Don McLean’s “Vincent,” lead to this exercise.

Procedure:

1. Divide the students into groups of three or four; each group should be assigned one poem/song dealing with Vincent’s painting. You can have the students complete these readings prior to the day you do this activity or you can have them read over their specific poem/song in the groups.

2. Have the groups closely analyze the words and the meaning behind the poem/song. It helps to have the artwork displayed in the background (or print off a picture for each group). Ask the students for similarities between the words of the poem and the visuals in the painting. Have any images in the painting inspired certain parts of the poem? What image/color in the painting struck the author of the poem/song? What first strikes each student? Has the author altered anything in the painting? What details are lost or added in these “translations”? Do these textual “translations” convey a different meaning or evoke another emotion?

3. Next begin with a general discussion about the painting, focusing on the students’ own interpretation of it. Next, I go around to each group and closely analyze the words of the poems and song in connection with the image. Before you discuss McLean’s song, I like to play the song, which allows us to also analyze the tone of the music; I ask them how the music element may explain or alter the feeling evoked by the painting or the song. I also ask the students questions about the different titles each artist chooses to use, the different occupations of Van Gogh, Fagles, Sexton, and McLean (what do they have in common?), and if religion becomes a important aspect in any of the interpretations to Van Gogh’s painting, or even in the painting itself.

Discussion/Follow-up:
At the end of the discussion, you could have each group make their own song or poem based on their interpretation. What part do they want to focus on? What would their title be? Even if the students do not create their own poem or song, you could have a discussion about the possible titles or images they would focus on in their own version. You can also point out that there is not one correct interpretation of a visual text, which these poems and song demonstrate.

Mechanical and Grammatical Exercises

1101's One-of-a-Kind Apostrophe Test

1101’S ONE-OF-A-KIND APOSTROPHE TEST

Jenny Caneen-Raja

“Well,” said the Captains wife “I knew it might come to this. Hes been hinting about NASAs plans for some time now; its scary but if he has to go on this 5 year survey of the Gindari system, well, he has to go . . . Im a military wife . . . and the militarys always come first with Glen.” she finished, somewhat sadly. Then she looked imploringly at the General. “Please General Henderson, youve got to tell me! Do the researchers plans include trying to contact any possible inhabitants of that star system? I mean, what if theyre not very friendly?”

“Oh now Mrs. Lovelace,” chuckled the General “Youre letting your imaginations worst fears prey on your mind! The possibilities of other beings contacting us are minuscule at best! But remember, your closest friends concerns must not tempt you into telling them the truth about your husbands mission! NASAs plans are too sensitive to publicly discuss just yet; weve been waiting for the right time . . . it could come at a moments notice . . .” and though he finished speaking, the Generals lips continued to move as he stared dreamily off into space.

All of a sudden, Mrs. Lovelace screamed “YOWWWEEEEEZ!” The cats tail had brushed against her fetchingly exposed calves, and in her reverie its unexpected presence had startled her. The General looked at her with some concern and not a little admiration. “Ive heard some screams in my time Mrs. Lovelace, but thats a 10 if I ever heard one!”

Mrs. Lovelace smirked back at him. “Do you often rate women as 10s, General?” she asked coyly. Suddenly, the General was reminded of his old Sunday school; the churchs school room had displayed Moses ten commandments, and for some reason “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors wife” popped into his mind just then.

Mrs. Lovelace, her hands maintaining a constant, expressive summary of their own, continued: “Glens been planning for some time now to be gone . . . at times Ive almost felt as if hes already left; our Friday night get-togethers havent happened for some time . . . ,” and then both of her hands constant gesturing suddenly ceased as she clasped the generals arm and said in her best bedroom voice “Hell be gone a long time, wont he General? And admit it, youre a part of the project too. When he does return, the projects next subject will you be, isnt that right? Shame to lose yet another sexy man to space . . .”

The Generals mouth felt very dry as he admitted “Youre right . . . Lois . . . upon Glens return, Ill be shipping out for my stretch at . . .”

“Dont,” Loiss hands seemed to say as she lay one gently against the Generals lips, stroking his bald head with the other. The Generals mind became a blank of non-verbals: yowzas and hubba-hubbas filled his head.

“But Lois, its not right!” he managed to say, just before Loiss eyes rolled back into her head, her scalp split open, her skins seams quickly detached from each other (dropping to the floor) and her four claws talons raked through the Generals stomach, eviscerating him in one fell swoop.

“Good,” thought the Scanlon Didtrac from the Gindari system as it stepped through the entrails mess and re-gathered its ‘woman-suit’, once more situating itself into Loiss appearance. “These busy-body earthlings never seem to know when theyre not welcome! Now lets see about one last Fridays get-together with Glen.”

1101’S ONE-OF-A-KIND APOSTROPHE TEST ANSWER KEY

“Well,” said the Captain’s wife “I knew it might come to this. He's been

the wife of the captain

hinting about NASA's plans for some time now; it’s scary but if he has to go

the plans of NASA

on this 5 year survey of the Gindari system, well, he has to go . . . I’m a military wife . . . and the military's always come first with Glen.” she finished, somewhat sadly. Then she looked imploringly at the General. “Please General Henderson, you've got to tell me! Do the researchers’ plans include trying to contact any possible inhabitants of that star

the plans of the researchers (there are many researchers/ i.e., plural noun)

system? I mean, what they’re not very friendly?”

“Oh now Mrs. Henderson,” chuckled the General “You’re letting your

imagination's worst fears prey on your mind! The possibilities of other beings

the fears of your imagination

contacting us are minuscule at best! But remember, your closest friends’ concerns must

the concerns of your friends (plural).

not tempt you into telling them the truth about your husband's mission! NASA's plans are too sensitive to publicly discuss just yet; we’ve been waiting for the right time . . . it could come at a moment’s notice . . .” and though he finished speaking, the General’s lips

the notice of a moment

continued to move as he stared dreamily off into space.

Mrs. Henderson thought to herself, “Why, that's just like Harry's new, weird

habit! The General must be involved in this thing . . . YOWWWEEEEEZ!” she

screamed aloud. The cat's tail had brushed her, and in her reverie its unexpected presence startled her. The General looked at her with some concern.

“I've heard some screams in my time Mrs. Henderson, but that’s a 10 if I ever heard one!”

Mrs. Henderson smirked back at him. “Do you often rate women as 10's,

Use an apostrophe to pluralize numbers mentioned as numbers

General?” she asked coyly. Suddenly, the General was reminded of his old Sunday

school; the church's school room had displayed Moses' ten commandments, and for some

the school room of the church (singular noun, add ‘ + s).

reason “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife” popped into his mind just then.

Mrs. Henderson, both of her hands maintaining a constant, expressive summary of

their own, continued: “Glen's been planning for some time now to be gone . . . at times I've almost felt as if he's already left; our Friday night get-togethers haven't happened for some time . . . ,” and then her hands’ constant gesturing suddenly ceased as she

there are 2 hands and THEY are doing something: the gestures of her hands (plural).

clasped the general's arm and said in her best bedroom voice “He'll be gone a long time, won't he General? And admit it, you're a part of the project too. When he does return, the project's next subject will be you, isn't that right? Shame to lose another sexy man to space . . .

The General's mouth felt very dry as he admitted “You're right . . . Lois

. . .upon Glen's return, I'll be shipping out for my stretch at . . .”

“Don't,” Lois's hands seemed to say as she lay one gently against the General's

Lois ENDS in s, so a singular noun is possessing something, add ‘ + s

lips and softly stroked his bald head with the other.

The General's mind became a blank of non-verbals: yowza’s and hubba-hubba’s filled his head.

Use apostrophe + s to pluralize words mentioned AS words

“But Lois, it's not right!” he managed to say, just before Lois's eyes rolled

back into her head, her scalp split open, her skin’s seams quickly detached from each

the seams of her skin (i.e., what’s possessed is plural, but the possessor is singular).

other, dropping to the floor, and her four claws’ talons raked through the General's

she has more than one claw, and they possess those nasty talons, so apostrophe ONLY.

stomach, eviscerating him in one fell sweep.

“Good.” thought the Scanlon Didtrac from the Gindari system as it stepped

through the entrails’ mess and re-gathered its ‘woman-suit’, once more situating itself

entrails is a plural noun: they are possessing the mess, so s + apostrophe only.

into Lois's appearance. “These busy-body earthlings never seem to know when they're not welcome! Now let's see about one last Friday's get-together with Glen.”

Chaos is (not) our Friend (?)

Chaos is (not) our friend (?)

Jenny Caneen-Raja

Below is an example of discombobulated writing: without proper capitalization, spelling and punctuation, we might unintentionally create potentially embarrassing sentences. See what you can do about fixing the mess below.

Whenever I’m getting reading to eat my cat is always at my feet at the stove I am always tripping over him and swearing at him nevertheless he is such a funny creature how many cats can eat artichokes correctly after all when my husband cooks the kitchen smells of strong erotic spices from what I have incorrectly called the middle east but now I refer to as south asian I didn’t know the difference and was embarrssed to realize I was referring to an actual incontinent incorrectly no matter how hard I try I haven’t been able to reproduce his best dishes but then he does have the benefit of spending most of his life in pakistan where do we get hour specialty spices I bet your wondering but to my surprise it hasn’t been difficult to find a decent ethnic grocery store all you need to do is look in the yellow pages hey theirs a novel idea you wouldnt believe how fresh and inexpensive the foods at these stores are when we shop at our favorite store rhythyms of india the owners know now us they often encourage us to buy the most recent shipment of goat meat I wasnt really crazy about that curry but love makes you do crazy things like happily married people everywhere we compromise when it is about something important we talk and sometimes agree to disagree though youve got to be yourself right

Miscellaneous Exercises

Curious Researcher Teaching Groups

Curious Researcher Teaching Groups
by Emily Dowd

[Instructors: The sheet that follows serves as directional advice for your groups. There will be five groups total, one for each chapter of The Curious Researcher by Bruce Ballenger. Depending on the number of class meetings you have per week, and the material you’ll need to cover each day, the length of these presentations may vary from 15 – 30 mins.]
At the end of this web page, you'll find a "Teaching Group Evaluation"to help you give the groups feedback on their presentation and a "Teaching Group Member & Self-Evaluation" to help the group members tell you about their contributions to the presentation.

TEACHING SECTIONS OF THE CURIOUS RESEARCHER

Direction for Groups: Get in contact with your members ASAP so that you can decide how to divide your chapter. Through Blackboard, you can send emails and exchange files to your entire class, or a particular person. I suggest you meet with your group at some point, though it's not necessary.

Think like a teacher – What material will be most relevant to the class at this point? Which pages can I recommend they pay close attention to? How can you present the material so that your students will grasp it? Which exercises will work best at this stage in the writing process?

You can use our projector with the Internet, handouts, Power Point slides, and/or demonstrations. The consol also plays DVDs and CDs. Handouts that mark-out your overview of the chapter work well, though your classmates can also make notes. If you want your students to bring materials to class for your lecture (handbooks, photos, ads, magazines, paper drafts, etc), you may send them emails through Blackboard, or make an announcement beforehand. I am also willing to help you as needed, so if there is something I can do let me know.

Think as a student – Which exercises worked best for me at this stage? Which were forgettable? If you lead an exercise in class, test it before you present so that you know how long it will take, and how many you'll have time for. Confer between members on which ones seemed most effective. Make sure any assignments you give the class for homework will help them advance their papers, but you are authorized to do so.

Note: Some chapters have a lot going on, so you'll need to really focus on covering the most pertinent material and exercises with the class. Also keep in mind the readings and journals we’re working on at the stage of drafting you present for. How might you choose/phrase your exercises or chapter material discussed to fit in with our process? Will your classmates have drafts in hand to work with? Should they bring in sources or pre-draft material?

Teaching Group Evaluation

Section:____________________

Presentation Date:____________

Group Members:__________________________________________________________

Chapter Presented:____________

Evidence of Preparation (scale of 1 – 5):
Notes:

Presentation of Main Points (scale of 1 – 5):
Notes:

Use of Extra Media, if applicable (1 – 5):
Notes:

Choice of Exercises (1 – 5):
Notes:

Involvement of Group Members (1 – 5):
Notes:

Teaching Group Member & Self-Evaluation

Section:____________________

Presentation Date:____________

Group Members:__________________________________________________________

Chapter Presented:____________

Rate Preparation of Each Group Member (scale of 1 – 5):

Notes to add:

Rate Your Preparation (scale of 1 – 5):

Notes to add:

Who Made the Most Effort? Why?

Who Made the Least? Why?

Considering your group’s honest interest in conveying the most crucial information to the class at the appropriate stage of drafting (preparation, methods, participation), what mark (1 – 5) do feel your group realistically deserves?

Guidelines for a Writing Conference

Guidelines for a Writing Conference

by Ormond Loomis, adapted from a model developed by Carissa Neff

Time Required: 15-20 minutes

Procedure: Schedule individual conferences with students to discuss the drafts they're writing and ask them to prepare by following the steps below.

STEPS TO FOLLOW BEFORE A CONFERENCE

Have a Writing Conference With Yourself

Writing helps us develop our thinking because it allows us to revisit our first thoughts. Through writing, we can re-see, reshape, and refine those thoughts. When writing is thought of as a process of dialogue between the writer and the emerging text, it means that we shift from being writers to being readers of our own drafts. As readers, we should always question our own draft(s).

Initial Questions Pull back from your paper. Ask yourself:

* What else can I say?
* What can I add here?
* Will this make sense?
* Is this what really happened?
* What will my peers or teacher ask? Notice? Feel? Think?

Questions About Information

Do I have enough information?

* What’s the strongest or most exciting part of the piece and how can I build on it?
* Have I shared enough detail to put readers in the action, instead of reporting what happened? Have I explained told where, when, and with whom this is happening (if another person is present?) Have I described scenes and people with enough detail that readers can see, feel, smell, touch, and taste what’s happening?
* Have I shared my thoughts and feelings at the points where my readers will wonder?
* Is there any part that might confuse a reader? Have I explained each part well enough that a reader will know what I mean without my explaining it?
* Does this piece need conversation (internal or external)? Did people talk? Did I talk to myself? Have I directly quoted the words they said?
* Does the conversation in the paper sound real?
* Are my internal thoughts clearly distinguished from words that were spoken?

Do I have too much information?

* What parts aren’t needed--don’t add to my point or story? Can I delete them?
* What is this piece really about, if I had to sum it up in a sentence? Are there parts that are about something else? Can I cut them?
* Is this a “rise-to-bed” piece, going through every event of the day? Can I focus on the important parts and delete the rest?
* Is there too much conversation? Too many fussy little details? Have I explained too much?

Questions About Leads

* Does my lead bring my reader right into my piece, right into the action?
* Where does the piece really begin? Can I cut out the first paragraph? The first two? The first page?

Questions About Conclusions

* Does my conclusion leave readers eager to reread the piece?
* Does my conclusion go on and on with obvious summary?
* How do I want readers to feel at the end of the piece? Does this conclusion do it?
* What do I want readers to know at the end of the piece? Does this conclusion do it?

Questions About Titles

* Does my title fit what the piece is about?
* Is my title a “grabber”? Would it make a reader want to read my piece?

Questions About Style

* Have I cluttered my piece with unnecessary adjectives and adverbs?
* Have I said something more than once?
* Have I used any word(s) too often?
* Are any sentences too long and tangled? Too brief and choppy?
* Have I paragraphed enough to give my reader’s eyes some breaks?
* Have I broken the flow of my piece by paragraphing too often?
* Does the voice stay the same--first person participant (I did it) or third person observer (he or she did it)?
* Does the main verb tense stay the same--present (it’s happening now) or past (it happened before)?

Get Ready for the Conference with Me

Prepare Written Notes for the Conference

* Pick five of the questions above, write responses to them, and be prepared to discuss them.
* Identify at least two issues you’d like to ask about. What advice would help you move ahead with the writing? Which issue is the most important for you?

Bring Copies to the Conference

Without the material we need to discuss, you’re unprepared, and we won’t get far. When you arrive, be sure to have:

* Two copies of the current draft of your paper. It may be useful to bring earlier drafts, backup notes, and copies of reference documents as well, but toting them along is up to you.
* Your conference notes.

During Our Conference

At the conference, you can expect me to ask a few of the following questions:

* How did you write this paper?
* How long have you been working on this draft?
* What problems have you encountered while writing?
* How is the writing going now?
* When you read over your text, how do you feel about it? If you were to lay out all your drafts/paragraphs/openings/conclusions and then sort them into piles of “very best,” “good,” and “less good,” which pile would this be in? Why?
* What are you planning to do next?
* What kind of writing are you trying to do? Do you have a sense of how you want your writing to be in the end?

Private Gardens in Public Parks: Writing the Bridge Between Self and History

Private Gardens in Public Parks: Writing the Bridge Between Self and History
by Cindy King

"The work of the poet investigating personal experience is always to find such points of connection, to figure out how to open the private out to the reader." –Mark Doty

One of the main objectives of this exercise is to increase your awareness of audience. As Doty says, "[writing] is about engaging the reader. Not with our opinions about things, but with our felt involvement in the world, the self's inextricable implications with our culture and time." The overall intention of positioning self within the context of history is to encourage you to see that the personal is political, political in a way that is attentive to how an individual sense of identity is shaped by what Doty calls a "collision with the collective." This exercise is designed to give you the opportunity to explore how your sense of self and others is defined through encounters with the social world, encounters between personal experience and the world at large.

Step 1: First freewrite, creating a portrait in words of someone you feel strongly about (a family member, friend, enemy or loved one, or the writer him- or herself). You should spend time developing a clear picture of your subject, rather than telling about how you feel about this person. Remember, word choice can reveal your attitudes about your subject without direct statement. Use the following prompts to help you get started:

* Describe what this person looks, sounds, feels, smells, or even tastes like.
* Write about what you know about this person's childhood or past.
* Image the how this person acts in a public place (at a bank, in the supermarket, at the library, etc.). Describe his or her public persona or façade. What do you think is this person's secret character (hidden notions or qualities they don't always exhibit)?
* What are this person's strengths and weaknesses?
* What kind of work does/did this person do? What does/did he or she know how to do?
* What inspires this person? What does/did this person do in his or her free time?
* Discuss what this person wants or hopes for? Speculate about this person's future.
* Who does/did this person love or fail to love?

Step 2: Next, you will need to go to the library or to the Internet in search of newspaper articles published from the year or exact birth date of the people featured in your written portraits. Lexis –Nexis and Wilson Select are great places to start. You may also find articles from other significant dates from the lives of your subjects—marriages, divorces, deaths, births, anniversaries. You should feel free to choose articles at random, perhaps on topics or events you find interesting; however, after having written your portrait, you will more than likely begin searching for articles that have some connection, however tenuous, to your written portraits. In browsing through newspaper archives, you will undoubtedly discover advertisements and pieces of popular culture. These may also be useful in Step 3.

Step 3: Lastly, you will write a personal narrative, story, or poem, weaving details from both Steps 1 and 2. You will begin intuiting links between personal experience and the events of the past, thus seeing it in the context of the world at large and allowing your audience to engage with your writing through a shared sense of history.

Raising the Stakes: Adding Tension and Intensity to a Story

Raising the Stakes: Adding Tension and Intensity to a Story
Paul Stenis

In her book, Writing Fiction, Janet Burroway explains a very important aspect of fiction writing:

Only trouble is interesting. This is not so in life. Life offers periods of comfortable communication, peaceful pleasure, and productive work, all of which are extremely interesting to those involved. But such passages about such times by themselves make for dull reading; they can be used as lulls in an otherwise tense situation, as a resolution, even as a hint that something awful is about to happen. They cannot be used as a whole plot. (29)

Using this quote as a guiding principle, take the following situations and rewrite them. Turn a dull situation into something worth reading. First, here's an example from Burroway's book:

Example of a dull situation: Joe goes on a picnic. He finds a beautiful deserted meadow with a lake nearby. The weather is splendid and so is the company. The food's delicious, the water's fine, and the insects have taken the day off. Afterward someone asks Joe how his picnic was. "Terrific," he replies, "really perfect."

Example of a situation worth reading about: At the picnic, Joe sets his picnic basket on an anthill. Joe and his friends race for the lake to get cold water on the bites, and one of Joe's friends goes too far on the plastic raft, which deflates. He can't swim, and Joe has to save him. On the way in he gashes his foot on a broken bottle. When Joe gets back to the picnic, the ants have taken over the cake, and a possum has demolished the chicken. Just then the sky opens up. When Joe gathers his things to race for the car, he notices an irritated bull has broken through the fence. The others run for it, but because of his bleeding heel the best he can do is hobble. Joe has two choices: try to outrun him or stand perfectly still and hope he's interested only in a moving target.

Now, rewrite the following situations to make them more interesting:

Dull Situation #1: Joe, his roommate, and his girlfriend take a trip to the bowling ally. They bowl three games together, and each person wins one game. There's a group of three high school boys in the lane next to them who courteously challenge them to a team game. The game ends in a tie, and everyone shakes hands afterwards. Joe even promises to help tutor one of them in math, and his girlfriend buys everyone sodas. They all have a great time.

Dull Situation #2: Joe and his parents take a trip to the movies. They rarely take these trips together, but Joe is confident they will enjoy whatever film he chooses for them to see. He decides on a romantic drama starring Robert Redford and Michelle Pfieffer, and they all enjoy it. Afterward his parents take him out for coffee and pastry. His mother comments on the fine acting, and his father, in a rare display of emotion, cries when asked how he feels about the plot. Joe pats his father on the back, and then leaves them with a feeling of contentment.

Dull Situation #3: Joe travels across the country to visit an ex-girlfriend. They meet at a restaurant to talk about old times. Both of them are now married, and they each discuss how happy they are in their respective relationships. His ex-girlfriend's husband arrives at the restaurant and buys the three of them a round of drinks. He and Joe have a great time talking about football. They even find ways to give Joe's ex-girlfriend a hard time about the days of her youth. Joe feels no regret about the encounter and arrives at the hotel thinking of his wife. Once he enters his hotel room, he calls her long distance to tell her everything. "I miss you," he says as soon as she picks up the phone.

Writing a Zine Agreement

WRITING A ZINE AGREEMENT

by Ormond Loomis

Goal/Purpose: This activity can be used as an early step in having students develop an anthology or zine of their workshop group's writing. It has several aims: clarify what texts the students will contribute to publication, give each member a role to play in the collaboration, create a schedule for the group to follow on the project, and give the students experience with writing a contract. I adapted it from my experience with writing contracts.

Time Required: 10-15 minutes in one class to let students brainstorm and write notes for the agreement; 10-15 minutes in the following class for students to read and further revise a typed draft of the agreement that one or more of the group members prepares plus 5-10 minutes for the instructor to read and approve, or not, the typed and revised draft (15-25 minutes total for this class period); and 5 minutes in another class to allow for members to sign the revised draft. Additional changes to the agreement can be discussed and written in group meetings either in or outside class.

Procedure: After explaining the group anthology or zine project, ask the students to work in small groups, of 3-6, to plan their publication and write an agreement that outlines their plan. It's important to give guidelines such as the ones that follow in the box below. It's reasonable as well to provide samples of agreements that students in preceding classes have written, but students may simply adapt samples without thinking as much as they should about the contents.

After the second class devoted to the exercise, in which the students revise a typed draft, review the agreement to ensure that it meets your expectations. If it does, mark it "S," and return it for the students to sign. If it doesn't, mark it "U," add comments to explain what's missing, and return it for additional revisions until it earns an "S."

Guidelines for the ZINE AGREEMENT

Develop a written statement outlining your workshop group's collective plan for developing your zine. There is no required length for the agreement, but it should cover at least six areas:

* who the audience of group's zine will be and what the theme of the issue will be;
* what pieces of writing and what graphics each group member will contribute;
* how the work for the zine will be divided;
* what schedule of work the group will follow;
* where and when critical meetings will be held; and
* what step(s) of the production each member will be responsible for -- for example,
o who will convene group meetings
o who will serve as group scribe;
o who will write a general introduction for the collection of papers;
o who will prepare a graphic layout or web page design for the collection;
o who will copy edit the drafts;
o who will compile the manuscripts on paper or upload them to the english3 server, or both;
o who will who will track the progress of the drafts if any are late?

You should develop an initial draft of your zine agreement during workshops on [insert date] and refine it in discussions outside class. Circulate a typed draft among the workshop members on [insert date], and change any parts that need expansion or correction. Prepare an operating version for every member to sign on [insert date]. Once it's completed and marked satisfactory, have each member sign it, and give each group member a copy to keep for her or his own reference.

Be sure to save the fully signed copy, and include it in the final portfolio.

Additional Comments: Students usually have fun dividing the work. The roles suggested in the guidelines can be combined or split up as the group members like. Caution them, however, about giving anyone more responsibility than anyone can, or should have to, reasonably manage. In fact, I usually ask workshop members to divide the work equally among themselves. To reinforce this point, I give the group a grade for the project, and give each member a percentage of the grade multiplied by the percentage of the work she or he contributes to the result. For example, if a group that consisted of four students created an A+ zine and they agreed they'd all done the same amount of work on it (25% each), the formula for each member's grade would be 100 (the A+ for the zine) x 4 x 25% = 100. If the same group of four created an A- zine and they agreed that three of them had each done 20% of the work and one had done 40%, the formula for the first three students' grades would be 90 x 4 x 20% = 72; and the other student's grade would be 90 x 4 x 40% = 144. (The amount earned for the project is added to grades for other work done during the semester to total a maximum of 100%.)

Remind students that the agreement is a working document. The process of drafting it in its initial form involves collaboration and negotiation. Unlike some documents, however, it can be amended if unanticipated events make changes necessary -- as long as all the members agree to the changes. To encourage everyone to stay informed about changes in the plans for the project, I insist that everyone keep her or his own up-to-date copy of the agreement, and I usually ask each student show me hers or his fully signed copy at some stage before the end of the zine assignment. As noted above in the guidelines for the agreement, I also require students to include their copy of the agreement in their final portfolio.

Revision Exercises

Changing Voices

Changing Voices -- Sarah Royalty

Time Required: At least 20-30 minutes

Goals/Purpose: This exercise prompts students to understand all the mental audiences they unconsciously have listening to them while writing, and how this might effect their writing in negative ways. It hopefully aids them to let loose of these negative or critical voices that might cut out the creativity or detail they could put into their writing.
Description: Changing Voices. This should be helpful when students are feeling stuck in the middle of their writing and semester and lack any fresh ideas--an exercise to break up the log-jam of frustration. and boredom.

Origin: This exercise is a combination of two ideas: 1)The horoscope exercise from Nuts and Bolts and 2) my thoughts after reading Ted Hughes’ poem "The Thought Fox", causing me to wonder about all that might go on in our heads as we read.

Procedure:
1. Ask students to take out a clean piece of paper and write their names on the top. Tell them this is something that will be turned in, so to write it accordingly--remind them this means it’s high quality and appropriate for a teacher’s eyes.
2. Give them a good five to ten minute writing topic, depending on your time--the longer the better, which gives some room for creativity and description, but has enough specific details that you don’t need to spend extra time thinking up ideas. For example: pretend you are sitting in a doctor’s office, or remember a real time that you were, and write about it. You can make up the details and situation, but this person has to be you. Another example: you are packing for a trip with your family. Describe what is going on and what you are thinking.
3. Now pass around cut-out photos of interesting looking people from magazines, Let them choose which one they want, so have enough available so that the students can have lots of choices. Ask them to make up a name for that person.
4. Tell them to put that name on a piece of paper. This will be handed in as well, but tell them you will not know who wrote the piece--the person in the picture is the writer, and the student will remain completely anonymous. Ask them to write about the same topic, but pretend they are this person doing the writing. Write about how they experience things, what they see, what they think. Tell them to be as imaginative as they want, but to take that person seriously (don’t make fun of them, make them real).
5. After they are done, start a discussion about which seemed "better" to them, or more interesting. Let them know there is now right answer, some students will prefer the first and probably the majority will prefer the second. Ask about the different writing experiences--who was their audience, what were the helpful and unhelpful voices in their head, was it good to be in disguise as a writer? Perhaps the disguise will lead you to your strongest writing voice.
6. Finish the discussion by talking about our own voice as writers, and negative voices that inhibit writing. Remind them that although they were in disguise, they were still the ones doing the writing, and perhaps when their writing seems bland or inhibited, they should try enlarging their voice as writers.

Follow up with readings about the effects of voice, for example, Carolyn Kremers and Brad Usatch’s essays in The Subject is Writing.

Comapring Tone and Style

by Paul Reifenheiser
Time Required: At least 30 minutes
Goals/Purpose: To show students some of the ways that tone and style are linked in decent writing.

Description/Procedure: I take two pieces of writing of vastly different tone and style and bring in copies of them for my students. I use the opening italicized section of "Prologue: I Hate Myself and I Want To Die" from Elizabeth Wurtzel’s Prozac Nation and the first chapter from both The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy and The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, which were both written by Douglas Adams. Prozac Nation is incredibly serious and pretty depressing. However it also has some decent writing and much of the section I employ is useful for the teaching of the personal memory paper. Douglas Adams’ work is, to me, hilarious and about the furthest possible thing from Wurtzel. If you haven’t read these books yet, then stop reading this junk and get a copy--now! They may even help you get tenure one day (well, maybe not but it can’t hurt).

I usually ask students to read them out loud and then we discuss the different techniques used. I use this as a way to introduce style and tone or to reinforce them later on in the semester. I’m sure you will know of some excellent works that you can contrast but these work well if you are looking for an easy way out. You can get by without using this one in a semester but it is a good one to have up your sleeve for those nights when you just can’t figure out what to do in class tomorrow (and there will be many of those). This can also work if you put the works on transparencies (getting copies can be annoying, but if you use them, make sure to cite the sources and only leave them on the Internet for one semester).

Creating Meaning

Creating Meaning -- John Grosskopf

Time Required: 30 - 40 minutes

Goals/Purpose: This exercise allows students to see how mutable meaning in writing can be, and how meaning is recreated by a reader.

Description: Creating Meaning. This exercise allows students to work with, and change, someone else’s meanings.

Origin: Jeddie Smith adapted this idea from Barry Lane’s After the End, Teaching and Learning Creative Revision, and from the board game Balderdash.

Procedure:
1. Write four obscure words or phrases on the board. Assemble students in groups of four or one large circle. Have them count off in fours and write the corresponding word on a piece of paper. Describe the defining feature of "Balderdash"--that these are real words and they need to find the meaning for them.
2. Everyone writes what their word represents for them. Remind everyone that an object is the most useful type of definition.
3. After everyone has finished, pass the papers to the left. Everyone should then read the meaning before them and jot down 5 questions that search out details in the meaning. Remember that questions that begin with "what" produce the best results--such as "What is it made from?"
4. Again pass the papers to the left. Now have the students read the definitions and questions and write short and creative answers to the questions.
5. Once more, pass the papers to the left. The fourth person in the sequence now has a piece of paper with a definition and questions that elicited further details. Read them and use them to write a descriptive paragraph in a focused freewriting style.
6. Return the writing to the author of the original definition. Discuss how the meaning has evolved. How is it different from what the original author intended?
7. Discuss this phenomenon in relation to how meaning is constructed and reconstructed in relation to entire texts.

John’s Note: This ties in well with Janette Harris’ chapter in The Subject is Writing. Discuss how this reflect the concept of an author’s mental text, by being converted to a physical text, is subject to recreation by a reader.

Developing Source Dialogue

Developing Source Dialogue
by Emily Dowd

Time Required: 35 minutes to full class period

Goals/Purposes: Research Article Revision

Description: This revisions exercise helps students identify source-heavy writing, and work towards viewing source material as a "person" with whom they carry on a conversation. You'll want to have an excerpt, short essay, or film clip ready for Part 2. Choose one with an overtly opinionated bent/bias that is sure to elicit a response. For a video clip, something like Michael Moore's interview with Marilyn Manson would work.

Origin: This is a combination of techniques gleaned from Bruce Ballenger's Fall 2005 presentation at FSU, and a variety of suggestions floating around the room afterward.

Procedure:
Part 1:

1. Ask students to bring two different-colored highlighters to class with their drafts. They’ll likely be in the later stages of drafting the research article, using a lot of source material.
2. Talk about tone and narrative voice (probably a topic you dealt with at the beginning of drafting), can they easily identify different "voices" in writing? More importantly, can they identify the voice of a source over their own?
3. Now, have them take out the first highlighter color and find all the sentences on at least the first two or three pages that contain source material, and highlight the from-source portions. Even if they have paraphrased the source, highlight it.
They’ll probably start to notice their pages turning pink, orange, yellow, or green – depending on the color of the highlighter! This is an indication that there’s too much source, and not enough author-source dialogue. Explain that there should be no more than 20% strict source material in any article – the author’s voice and focus should always predominate.
4. Now, take out highlighter color two. Ask them to go through now and mark those passages containing strictly author opinion, viewpoint, unique ideas, or thoughts. Most students will find this color a bit underused, but others will notice too much highlighter here if their source material was seriously lacking.
5. Take a moment to diagnose the different problems these papers may be suffering from. Too much color one means source overload. Too much color two means empty opinion and guesswork. A comfortable balance means they’re probably doing well – but they can still benefit from developing smooth narrator-source dialogue.

Part 2:

1. Tell students that you’re going to play the part of a talking source by reading your chosen excerpt allowed (or playing your video clip). Read or play the sample, statement-by-statement, pausing at each point to allow students to write their honest, opinionated, conversational response to what the "source" has just said. They should pretend that they’re talking face-to-face with the author or speaker. Replying naturally and intelligently.
2. Once you feel you’ve got sufficient conversation/dialogue generated on paper, ask a few students to read their replies as you reread the "source" (like a script), creating an actual conversation. Discuss handling sources as if in dialogue with them. Have student try this with highlighted source sections of their drafts.

Exploding a Moment

Exploding a Moment -- Angel Barbee

Time Required: 45 minutes
Goals/Purpose: Revision Activity
Description: Exploding A Moment. This revision technique is especially helpful in eliciting rich details (and the students will love the length it adds to a draft) It’s almost like writing in slow motion--slowing down the moment--to capitalize on sights, thoughts, feelings, and more.
Origin: Inspired by Barry Lane’s After The End: Teaching and Learning Creative Revision and fellow Teaching Assistant Chris Davis.

Procedure:
1. Read orally the following paragraph:

I woke up late this morning--as usual. I had no clean clothes and the fridge was next to bare. Traffic was heavy as I sped to work. Some jerk cut me off and I almost had a wreck. At work I went to my desk and there was a note to go and see the boss. I waited outside her office for a while before she called me in. I couldn’t figure out why she wanted to see me. I went inside and sat down. My boss handed me an envelope. She told me that my services were no longer needed and that I was free to go. I got my belongings from my desk and left. The drive home was quick. I am now unemployed.

2. Point out the lack of details in this paragraph. Explain that any one of these sentences could be "exploded" to create an interesting story. I then read them the following explosion I wrote as an example:

Some jerk cut me off and I almost had a wreck. I hate people who can’t drive. I decided to teach him a little lesson by playing near bumper cars with his bright red 300 ZX. He kept hitting his brakes, and eventually even shook a fist of rage at me. I giggled gleefully--kind of like that lady in Fried Green Tomatoes who got immense pleasure from repeatedly rearending the car of the person who had stolen her parking space. Space is crucial, and that jerk will probably think twice before he cuts into mine again.

3. Now pass out copies of the first (bland) paragraph to students while they are getting into pairs. Tell them to choose one sentence to explode, making up the most interesting details they can--as long as their additions will still fit in the facts of the original paragraph.

4. After giving them 15-20 minutes, read the original paragraph again orally one sentence at a time, asking for volunteers to share their explosions. Students usually enjoy this time and are eager both to share and to listen to each other’s explosions.

5. Finally, after discussing the differences between the bare bones of the first paragraph and the rich details of their explosions, have students take out their most recent drafts and choose a sentence they feel is ripe for explosion (with actual details this time). Have students explode the moment(s) they’ve chosen as a means of adding interesting details to future drafts.

Believe me, as far as revision techniques go, this one has been phenomenal. "Exploding a moment" is a tool that can really add depth to student writing. It even gives a new vocabulary for revision; I can’t tell you how many of my students have said, "I think I’ll do an explosion here!"

Fun with Death

FUN WITH DEATH

by Paul Reifenheiser

Time Required: At least 30 minutes

Goals/Purpose: Same as rewriting horoscopes: to bring out details in writing. Most obituaries (obits) are dull and give little details. Use this as a way to have students actually do what an obit is meant to do--celebrate the life of a person who has died. Some may find this morbid but it doesn’t have to be -- have them focus on creativity and positives in ther person’s life. If some still think that this is not a proper exercise then just write up your own brief descriptions of people: "Paul Reifenheiser, attends F.S.U., moveds here from N.Y. and lives with dog, cat, and fiancee." From something like that, or an obit, have them create an entire character. Or, in the case of the obit, ask them to reveal the details of what the obit only alludes to -- names of children, how the person died, what they did for a living. It will offer a chance for groups to work together and shows them how to add depth and creativity to poor writing. I have also found that it is a good reinforcement because at the end of the semester some students forget everything you have attempted to drive into their skulls all semester long.

Description: "Fun With Death" is an exercise to bring together workshop groups and have them work together on a group project. I tend to have my students create Zines at the end of the semester and use this as a way of getting the ready for the project. This exercise should also reveal who in the group is serious, doesn’t care, is a leader, etc.

Origin: Stephanie Harrell

Procedure:

1. Cut out obituaries from a newspaper. I would use something like the New York Times for two reasons: 1) They may know some of the people in the Democrat, and 2) reading the Democrat is the intellectual equivalent of bludgeoning your head with a hammer.
2. Give each group an obituary and have them add depth to the writing by rewriting them as a whole group (only one rewrite per group, that is). If they fool around a bit or don’t seem to care -- good, let them screw around (you’ll see why in a moment). In effect, give them the asignment then leave them alone.
3. When they are done, have one person from each group read the obit alood to the class. Then have the class (and yourself) ask them questions which will lead to more deatils that they missed, i.e. What was her sisters name? What company was she VP for? What was the name of her lover in the mailroom. etc?
4. Don’t let them answer out loud -- tell them they will have to write them down and rewrite the obit again. However, tell them that this time it counts for a grade (I tell them it counts as 5 or 10% of their total Zine grade and they have 10 minutes to finish. I don’t actually go through with the grading part, and I tell them taht when they are through. This should give them some idea of who won’t work well without pressure, who will work hard all the time, who takes charge when it simply has to get done. Some groups work well all time, but most work very differently.
5. Follow up with journal assignment asking them to write their own obits.

Hidden Conversations

HIDDEN CONVERSATIONS

Mark Hamilton

Time Required: 45 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise gives students a practical example of a situation with lots of internal text.
Description: Hidden Conversations. For every external text (body language, spoken language, written language) there is an internal text (individual thought). For instance, in every conversation between teacher and student, athlete and coach, celebrity and fan, boyfriend and girlfriend, there’s something internally going on. Often the internal text is much more honest and much more brutal than the external text.
Origins: This is a very slight variation on an activity Robert Pastor used. He credited, I believe, Jerome Stern for the idea.

Procedure:

1. The teacher draws a large, upside-down triangle on the board. This is an iceberg, and it’s notable for this exercise in that a large part of it (perhaps 75-90%) is underwater, just as much of life’s text in never seen externally. A large part of life always exists under the surface.
2. Tell two students to sit down across from each other next to the chalkboard. Then instruct the students to pretend that they are meeting for the first time, and this is the first time they have ever seen or spoken to each other. As they talk, the teacher should write in bubbles (just like the comics) above their heads what you think they are really thinking. Usually its the exact opposite of what they are actually saying to one another. This is the hidden conversation model for the class.
3. After you have modeled the activity, have two students write the hidden internal dialogue for each of the two students in the chairs as they talk. Make sure everyone has time to participate.

You can substitute other scenarios to generate dialogue; new roommates, someone who has just dented your fender in a parking lot, an annoying person that won’t leave you alone at a party. Have fun.

Learning to Lie

LEARNING TO LIE

Jim Bowers

Time Required: As little as 15-20 minutes, or nearly an entire session-- depending on the number of student samples chosen to be read aloud and questioned.
Goals/Purpose: This exercise encourages students to discover and invent convincing details.
Description: Learning to Lie. This makes use of each student’s experience, through the selection of exact details, imagery, and sense evocations, in order to illuminate the role of specificity in the writing process
Origin: What If? Writing Exercises for Fiction Writers by Anne Bernays and Pamela Painter.

Procedure:

1. Ask the students to write in two or three sentences, three unusual, startling, or amusing things they did or that happened to them. One thing must be true, the other two must be "lies". Ask them to use specific details.
2. Read one example as follows:

* Elvis Presley wrote me a two-sentence letter after I sent him a poem I written about him and a picture of my sister in a bikini.
* The first time I heard him play, Buddy Rich through me a drum stick during a drum roll and never missed a beat.
* I asked Mick Jagger to sign a program for me, but he said he preferred to sign my left, white shoe. And he did.

1. Now require everyone to do three.
2. Then have students, one by one, read them to the class. Other students are allowed to ask three questions that pertain specifically to the details. For example, someone might ask (using the example above), "Why did you send Elvis your sister’s picture instead of your own?" Or "What was Buddy Rich playing?" Or "Do you still have the white shoe?"
3. The writers have to be able to think on their feet, to make up more convincing details, to "lie". Then ask for a vote as to which story is true and which were fictitious. It is surprising how many students find that they are already excellent "storytellers."

This is a good exercise to use in the beginning of the drafting process, when students are busy building their early writing through the discovery of significant details--but it is also a lesson in revision in that information and detail may be added at any point during the drafting sequence.

Proofreading Pitfalls Handout (Exploring Cultural Mediums Strand)

Proofreading Pitfalls Handout--Exploring Cultural Mediums Strand

This is not so much an Invention or Revision exercise as it is a demonstration for good proofreading skills. In using this exercise, remember it is meant to be cut-up and distributed to the class, or you could just project it if you have a tech room.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn’t myyaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. this is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter.

Silent Film Exercise

SILENT FILM EXERCISE

Maxwell Wheeler

Time Required: 45 minutes
Goals/Purpose: This exercise will actively expose students to their assumptions and biases and those of their peers, and the film maker’s world views. It also provides an experience to write descriptively.
Description: Silent Film Exercise. Students will provide dialogue to and interpretation of a silent piece of a film.
Origin: The idea of using film in the classroom, but not this specific exercise, came from Suzanne Model, a Sociology professor and the University of Massachusetts, Amherst.

Procedure:

1. Choose a scene from a motion picture. Obscure films will probably work best since fewer students will know them already. The scene should have plenty of action or a variety of characters.
2. Play the film clip to the class without sound, but first explain that afterwards they will write a descriptive account of the clip. Suggest that they might want to focus on a single character, invent dialogue, depict the place and time, create a situation or background, or say what happens next.
3. Let the write and share their descriptions.
4. Play the clip again, this time with the sound on and provide the necessary contextual details.
5. The you may want to ask them to write about the similarities in and differences between their individual accounts and the screen writer’s.

I think this activity affects students more if they perform it after their first paper or after they have participated in several workshops or have read several selections from Our Own Words. Since its intent is more conceptual that practical, it suits any draft stage.

Stylistic Revision

Stylistic Revision

Stacy C. Brand, Sarah Fryett, and Samantha Levy

Time Required: At least 40-50 minutes

Goals/Purpose: The goal of Stylistic Revision is to concentrate on sentence construction in later revisions. It is designed to engage students with their essays on a sentence to sentence level that will enable them to write in a clear, concise, immediate style.

Description: This exercise should be helpful in the later drafting stages. Students will be required to pay close attention to language and to their closings (end of their essay).
This exercise has two parts:

Part I: avoiding passive voice
[Create passive voice handout with examples if you feel it is necessary.]
1. Pass out individual copies of “Another Fish Story” to students at the beginning of class. Ask them to take 10 minutes to read over it, underlining instances of passive voice and also any striking similes or metaphors.
2. Have a brief discussion about what they underlined, including a brief discussion of passive voice using examples from the essay.
3. Students should pick a paragraph of their choice and rewrite with the knowledge taken from discussion (and their own) using active, immediate language.
4. Share with class!

Part II: ending the essay
1. Now discuss the closing paragraphs of the essay, describing what’s working, what they notice, what strikes them, what doesn’t, etc. Discuss ways to tighten the language avoiding clichés and generalities. Also discuss how to close the essay without being conclusive, avoiding the traditional modes of restating what’s already been said, etc.
2. After discussion have students rewrite the last paragraph avoiding clichés, etc. implementing also what was discussed in Part I.
3. Share!

Have students implement this exercise in their own work for the next revision.

Additional Comments: This is not a lesson in grammar; it is lesson in language.

The Wet Beagle: Show Me Don't Tell Me Workshop

THE WET BEAGLE: SHOW ME DON'T TELL ME WORKSHOP

Paul Reifenheiser

Time Required: An entire class session
Goals/Purpose: To prepare students for workshopping and the writing of their first paper (in my classes the personal memory paper). This one is so obvious that it is sickening, and its also easy and a great exercise.
Description: The Wet Beagle: A Show Me Don’t Tell Me Class Workshop. this is a way of showing you students what subject matter and language are worthwhile, and also what you expect from workshop sessions.

Procedure:

Write a paper on the same topics your students are writing. Experienced TA’s may want to use past student papers of In Our Own Words but I advocate writing one yourself. If you write the paper then you can make sure it has all the positive and negative qualities that you desire. Don’t be concerned about the time involved, it is not extensive--I write mine in less than half an hour--just write the thing and don’t proofread it (remember, you want there to be stupid mistakes and poor writing). You can also use the same paper over and over again in later semesters. Be creative, you ask that of your students. If you don’t want to share any moments with your students, make one up, or don’t tell them that you wrote it.

Overall it is a "show, don’t tell" exercise. Rather than tell my students what to do I showed them in my own paper. This is an excellent way to show them what types of subject matter and language you think are worthwhile. I want my students to feel as though they can and should write anything they want so I try to choose personal (often embarrassing but serious) topics. I also show them uses of language, such as ways to use curse words effectively in an essay. I find next to nothing offensive and use this as a way of showing that. However, this exercise can be tailor-made to show whatever you don’t want (repetitive, redundant, too long, too boring, spelling mistakes, grammar errors). However, at the core use some decent writing and some good techniques. The essay I use (for the personal memory assignment) uses a flashback and "show don’t tell" techniques to try to tell the story of an entire night in actual time of a few minutes (both flashbacks and showing are new to and risky for students). I tried to make an opener that would suck in the reader and make them want to read more (another thing I emphasized in my classes). I also try to get them to use interesting or at least uncommon titles (thus the name of the exercise) that add to the paper. It also works well to make a first and second draft of your paper and show students how to workshop and the process of drafting at the same time. Leave the second draft open for improvements though.

Have the paper put on a transparency and workshop it as a class on the overhead projector going paragraph by paragraph. As you workshop, praise comments that are useful and don’t let students give responses like "I like that" or "I don’t like that--it sucks." Make them tell you why and elaborate on why they don’t like something. In essence just show them that you what you want form workshopping. My classes always found things that I had missed in my own writing, and more often than not, found everything that I was hoping they would find. It is usually one of the best things I do all semester long.

Wrap-up: I usually close by asking them how they would respond to this as a first draft. I ask if it has potential, should be scrapped, etc. Then I tell them how I would respond--this tends to give them as idea of what to expect.

Titles (Say So Much)

TITLES

by Emily J Dowd

Start by reading aloud, or writing on the board (if you have an interactive classroom there are even better ways) the following title. I make a point of not completing it written, reading the last of it instead.

A very surprising narrative of a young woman, discovered in a rocky-cave, after having been taken by the savage Indians of the wilderness in the year 1777, and seeing no human being for the space of nine years. In a letter from a gentleman to a friend.

[A chapbook from America, between 1788-1851. Chapbooks were the Reader’s Digest of the period; cheaply printed and pedaled by traveling booksellers.
In this story, “A most beautiful young Lady sitting near the mouth of a cave” [oh, I bet, after 9 years she musta been somethin’ else] is discovered by two travelers in the wilderness. After recovering from a faint upon seeing them, “Heavens! Where am I?” she exclaims, and proceeds to tell them that she and her lover had been attacked by Indians, who murdered her lover and captured her. She chewed threw her bonds [this sound fishy to anyone else?], and in order to escape: “I did not long deliberate but took up the hatchet he had brought and, summoning resolution I, with three blows [she took note to count them, apparently], effectually put an end to his existence [axes will do that].” She managed also to lop off his head, quarter the corpse, and drag it half-a-mile to some foliage she figured could use the fertilizer, and hid it. She’d been growing Indian corn ever since. Of course, once returned home by her rescuers, she is reunited with her father, who’s so happy to see her again he dies and leaves her a handsome fortune. (From Popular Culture in American History, Jim Cullen ed.)
Other chapbook titles include: At a Court held at Punch-Hall, in the Colony of Bacchus. The Indictment and Trial of Sir Richard Rum…]

I ask questions like, Boy, wonder what happens in that story! Do you want to read it? What’s wrong with it? How does it lose your attention? I explain that print culture has changed in these decades, that books then couldn’t afford advertising or enticing covers to inspire readership, and that no print could be spared for a back cover description. So, the title became the description. People also had much longer attention spans and fewer competing stimuli!

This leads into the present day, and how this story could be adapted – or what stories/movies they know of that seem to have borrowed this theme. How can we make it better? What would you title the story?

After we’ve exhausted this discussion, I move on to titles of the present, and how/why they work. On the board, I write simply…

IT
- How does this title work?
- Does IT make you curious? Why?
- What things do we associate with the term “it” (It’s gonna get you! It’s out there!)?
- How does the size of the book make you ironically interested in terms of the title? (book huge, title small = something’s going on with “it”!)

Lord of the Flies
- Oxymoron creates interest
- What do we associate flies with? (dead things, feces, etc) How does this make the word “lord” more intriguing?
Kick Ass
- Carl Hiaasen’s collected editorials from the Miami Herald
- How does it grab attention? Why?
- Dual function, it’s also a statement of Carl’s personal philosophy of metropolitan journalism. “Turn over rocks. Dig out the dirt. Kick ass.”
Something Wicked This Way Comes
- Speaks for itself: what’s coming?
- Turn of phrase is out of the ordinary, and is both pleasing and dissonant to the ear.
All the King’s Men
- Nursery rhyme plays on our common knowledge and we recall the rest of the tale, makes us curious about how this one will turn out
- Begins in mid-phrase, requiring us to fill it in, leaving us hanging
Where the Red Fern grows
- Where? Curiosity’s raised by implication. Who cares about ferns? There has to be something else going on there, we think.
- The color red paints sinister pictures in the mind.
G.I. Jane
- We recall the common phrase “G.I. Joe” and are interested by the switch.
- We know enough about this story by inference to maintain some interest.
Let’s Get World Serious
- Title of a Sport’s Illustrated article, by Rick Riley.
- How does the switch of the word “series” to the near “serious” have an effect?
- How does it target its appropriate audience – sports fans?

I complete the discussion by extending the invitation: Can you guys think of any good ones, and why are they good? You may want to have them practice on their own papers, or trade papers, and practice on their classmates’ papers.

Transitions

TRANSITIONS

Paul Ketzle

Time Required: About 20 minutes
Goals/Purpose: To teach students how to construct effective transitions in their writings and look for connections between ideas where a natural link might not be obvious.
Description: Transitions asks students to link unrelated ideas and discovery new and creative ways of tying together concepts in their writings.

Procedure:

1. Tell them to divide a sheet of paper in half, making two columns. In the left column, have them list what they like about Tallahassee. In the right column, what they dislike. Give them time to make a fairly decent sized list, at least seven or eight in each column. I write my own list on the board.
2. Have them randomly circle two ideas in the like column. Then two ideas in the dislike column.
3. Have them number these four ideas, starting with a like, then a dislike, then back to a like again. e.g. 1.rainbows 2. bloody noses 3.warm soup 4.pop quizzes
4. Now begin a discussion about Transitions. Ask them if they understand what teachers mean by rough transitions. I explain that the difficulty often arises in people's inability to see the connections between ideas, and one way to get better at that is to practice looking for those connections between ideas which don't seem naturally related.
5. Tell them to write, to move from subject one to two to three to four. I explain that a bad transition is one which just jumps suddenly from one idea to another with no idea logically connecting the two. It will probably also be beneficial to explain that good transitions also do not stray too far from the main idea of the writing. i.e. don't just ramble.
6. (optional) When they have worked on this for a while, have some people read their pieces out loud. The first people done will probably be the ramblers. Discuss what could be done to tie all of their ideas together.

What Is It?

WHAT IS IT?

Kelly Tompkins

Time Required: 30-45 minutes. Works best if students are asked to think of the object they will write about the night before class.
Goals/Purpose: This exercise is designed to help students enrich their narratives through use of detailed descriptions, imagery, and metaphors, asking them to explore creative ways of using language to expand their powers of expression.
Description: What Is It? The students must use their senses to describe an ordinary object and to take that object and bring it to life through acute observation.

Procedure:

Ask your students to think of an object. It could be anything--a pen, their favorite teddy bear, a book--whatever they want. Then read the following questions aloud, giving them a few moments to respond to each one. Tell them they must answer the question on a full sentence, not just a one column list.

1. Imagine you are sitting in your favorite room. Where are you?
2. You are sitting on something. Reach down and touch it. What does it feel like?
3. You look around the room and see your object. How well can you see it? Where is the light coming from?
4. You stand up and immediately notice your feet. Why? What are you standing on?
5. You walk over to your object. How many steps did it take?
6. Your object is lying next to several other things. One of these things reminds you of something or someone else. What does it remind you of?
7. Pick up the object. How heavy is it? Can you toss it in the air?
8. Put the object close to your eyes, so close that it becomes blurry. What do you see? (tiny bumps? little lines?)
9. Put your object against your ear. Does it make a sound? What does that sound (or lack of sound) remind you of ?
10. Put your object under your nose. What does it smell like? What does the scent remind you of?
11. While you have the object this close to your face, you might as well taste it. Go ahead, stick out your tongue. What is that taste? What does it remind you of?
12. You are getting tired of this exercise. Get rid of your object. Dispose of it somehow. How did you get rid of it and how do you feel now that it is gone?

Workshop Exercises